Published on 12, July, 2020
I've realised that people prefer it if I start with pleasantries, not just going straight to the point of what I want to say.
e.g. just now I went to get my recycling bin after it had been emptied. At least I thought it was my bin. I saw my neighbour getting into his car so I called 'is this my bin?' He looked blankly at me and said, 'hello, how are you? Haven't seen you for a while.' I was confused, I needed to know if that bin was mine or his. He was confused because he hadn't seen me for a while and wanted to say hello, not talk about bins.
Then it dawned on me, ta dahhhhhhhhhh! I should have said 'hello how are you?' Before launching into the questions about the bin.
I like to get straight to the point, never mind chit chat. Most humans prefer the chit chat first.
I hope this has been helpful
Thank you. I am not used to being complimented. My mother has never liked me. My in laws don't like me. Hardly any people I meet like me. I am used to being the outcast and disliked.
That sounds better.
That is very nice. People in real life always laugh at my comments and I never know why. They don't appreciate my directness about most things and give me a wide berth. I always try to be more indirect and woffly in real life to avoid this. It is tiring.
They sound like strange people.
I don't mind pleasantries, but whenever others talk; they rip the backside of a conversation.
My uncle tries to explain things to me by taking the conversation for a walk. Whenever I get the point, he's saying, "Woah, woah! Take your time!"
Women are even worse, because they get all emotional and say, "I think the world of ye!" Their life evolves around TV, Drinking, Smoking, Eating and Talking.
that is a better description,
I am not good with words,
blunt like lumberjack chopping wood with a dull axe I am :P
Yes, you have a lovely nature and relatability. Nobody is laughing at you, I believe we are laughing with you
Tassimo's right,
while being dead serious you can make laugh
unitentional sarcastic natural talent?
Kiki, I think Mariusz is pointing to the fact that you have a wonderful, direct way of expressing yourself— your comments and posts always have a quality of open-ness, vulnerability and authenticity that give off positive vibes. I'm certain there is nothing remotely derogatory in his comment.
So, exactly why are my comments funny? Can you enlighten me because I have no idea? I'm usually being serious.
Which specific comments are funny? Are you being serious that they are funny? Or are you just being nasty to upset me? I am floundering here.
I just nod and smile. As a wife and mother I get plenty of practise at that listening to my family's stories. Then if I can change the subject I do.
I don't talk to people who only talk about themselves though, I assess people to see if they're good at back and forth conversations. If they lecture me, I don't talk to them if I can help it.
I don't mind talking to my neighbours, they don't really do small talk either. I just chat to them in case I need them e.g. when people break my fence, they are witnesses.
That's a good point. Don't ask a question if you don't want to hear the answer. For me, this usually applies to much bigger subjects though.
^ agree, same for me.
which is why it's irritating when you get the 'fine, you?' response when you actually care enough to ask the question!
You know, I realised at some point I think it has been part of my masking. Asking people how they are cos that's what youre supposed to do when really often times, I'm not much interested at that point in time.
I find KikiCat's comments hilarious most of the time real talent in cheering up autistic
this made me laugh thanks
btw. it will be 'hit of the week' topic this week
I have only just discovered this myself. I have only just discovered Im neurodiverse so thought I was just blunt and have no speech filter lol, I generally just blurt out what is in my head... but yes people generally like a bit of small talk first which I need a lot of practice one. Glad Im not the only one that does this though so thanks for the post.
yes, I say, be sure if you want to hear an answer before you ask a question, My colleagues often make that ''mistake''