Hi :)

Hi Kate, I'm so sorry you are struggling so much at the moment with your anxiety. It's so hard isn't it when it gets really bad. I used to find with mine that I had flare ups where it went from mild to really severe and now it's constantly severe can't escape it. You're right only people who have it really understand what it's like. The effect it causes is just terrible in every way, tiredness is a major pain. I'm tired all day every day. No nothing has or is working for me yet. I try so many things but nothing helps. I even tried eating healthy stuff because that's meant to help but nothing worked. It's getting to a point where I might have to see my doctor but I really don't want to do that because the thought makes me extremely anxious! Don't want to go but I also can't live like this forever either. Have you found anything that helps you Kate? I hope yours gets better soon :) no one should have to live with this sort of thing. It's so hard.

I've got my dog but she is a coward so doesn't offer much comfort haha. I love her to bits though. I've thought about going to more busy places but even a few people is too many for me and it sets off the anxiety - and suddenly I'm more anxious than I was before. Wish I could cope a bit better but I can't. I try all the time but it just is so bad I really am lost now. Hate it so much. I do try to walk when I can but because I'm so scared and on edge I hardly leave the house now but I don't think that's healthy for me so I do force myself out at times but the end result is anxiety and panic attacks. Hopefully your walks are a lot better! 

I really hope things improve for you Kate. :) 

Hi Jess - yes - I really struggle so much with anxiety at the moment - I’m trying my best to cope but not doing great to be honest. I’m sorry you’re experiencing this too - only people who live with this know just how horrible it is. It’s exhausting too. Have you found anything that really helps you with your anxiety and panic attacks? 

I’m sorry you don’t have anyone to walk with - I would also be a bit nervous about walking in remote places on my own. Maybe there are some places that are busy enough that you could though? Some parks are busy enough to feel quite safe. We quite like walking round cities/suburbs/villages sometimes too. Sometimes we go out to a city really early in the morning so that they’re aren’t many people about. Or perhaps you could find a walking group with not too many people? I wonder if there are any walking groups just for autistic people? If there isn’t there should be! 

Hi Kate. I hope you don't mind me replying to you. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry that you suffer from anxiety and panic attacks, I do as well and it's really hard to get through each day with this. Do you find that as well? I live on the edge of my nerves and going out or being around people makes me so anxious I feel like I'm going to be sick! Maybe at some point I'll improve with this but so far it seems to be getting worse.

Going for walks with your husband and youngest son sounds lovely. I like to go for walks as well but on my own because of bad experience I had a few years ago. Being with people makes me so nervous.

Hello, welcome here. 

I'm new as well. Hope we both enjoy being here.

Hi welcome. I just joined as well 

Hi Pru - to be honest I’m not coping very well with my anxiety at the moment. I’m doing my best to try all the strategies I have but am still really struggling. What do you do to help with your anxiety and panic attacks? I do definitely find that getting out into nature is one of the best things. Generally I love being at home but recently I feel I’m stuck in a groove of worry etc and being in the house all the time isn’t helping with that. We went for a walk the other day and just followed the public footpaths without really knowing exactly where we were going (other than a vague sense of direction) and it was lovely. We ended up doing an 8 mile walk - much longer than we intended! Both my son and I are struggling with anxiety so it does us both good to get out. We take snacks and drinks - it’s nice. 

I’m incredibly nervous about going to the doctor too - sometimes my husband phones them on my behalf because I find it so difficult - so I can really relate to that. I worry that I withdraw from things so much though due to my anxiety - as  I feel it can become a bit of a vicious circle - the less I do things the harder I find it to go back to engaging with some aspects of life. Part of me would like to go and live on a remote Scottish island - maybe then I’d be able to relax more?! Or maybe it would be worse and I’d just focus more on my worries? I don’t know. I do like going to places though - and so would miss being able to have a day out in Cambridge or wherever. I like to roam around interesting place. 
Talking of Cambridge - do you ever go to Choral Evensong? We sometimes go to cathedrals or University chapels to go to Choral Evensong - they have the most fantastic choral music and it’s totally free and anyone can go and enjoy it. Some cathedrals have a Choral Evensong almost everyday. It’s a great way to access free live music of a very high quality. 
I do feel very lucky to have met my husband and have two children (my eldest has their own place and a girlfriend now). To be honest I’m not even sure I’d still be here if it wasn’t for them - as I do struggle to cope with life and might have given up without my husband’s support and the fact I feel I need to be here for my children. I know some people view autism as a ‘superpower’ but most of the time I just find life very difficult and very stressful - I certainly don’t feel very powerful because of it. 
im sorry you don’t have anyone to walk with. Although sometimes I have gone on walks on my own and really enjoyed it - it can be nice can’t it? Are there any walking groups in your area you could join? Or do you prefer walking on your own? What sort of landscapes do you like to walk in? We like Derbyshire, the Lake District, and Cornwall. But also local walks too with are less spectacular but still nice - just your regular English farmland footpaths. Still good. 
I’m sorry you’ve been feeling lonely. You’re not alone - lots of people on here can really relate to what you’ve said here. People on this forum are very supportive and we can relate to each other’s struggles and ways of thinking. It’s so good to feel that isn’t it? We’re not alone because we are chatting on here. 

Hi Kate, it's lovely to meet you :) 

I'm so sorry you suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. Are you coping ok with this? I justo to confess I am not, I probably should see a doctor but the thought makes the anxiety and panic even worse! So at the moment I'm just hiding away to keep myself calm. I've been hiding for 4 and a half years so far.

I hope your anxiety and panic get better for you soon! 

Oooh you have such amazing taste in music. I love it all especially choral music there's just something so relaxing and soothing about it I think. When I was driving, stopped because of anxiety, I used to have so much classical in my car. Absolutely loved that.

I love walking in the countryside as well! It's so peaceful and relaxing. Aw wow your married and have a son, big congratulations to you Kate. I would love to be married and have a child one day. It must be nice that your husband is autistic too, I mean that in that he must understand a lot of how you feel and what you go through. It must be nice walking with them as well. Sadly I've no one to walk with.

I can understand that Kate. That's pretty much why I'm here as well. I've been away from everything and everyone for so long but I'm lonely and I don't think it does my mental health much good either. I've already met so many lovely people here today, yourself included in that :) so already I'm so glad I came here.

Hi Desmond,

Thank you!

You should definitely give it a try. It can be hard work but so rewarding especially if you're growing your own food. It's a good hobby as well, keeps you busy and gives you less time to worry. That's what I find when I'm in my garden.

It sounds like you have a wide range in your taste of music. I will have to look some of them up, I know Bob Dylan though! 

Hi Bill,

Thank you!

I would absolutely love that! I'll get my gloves :-) 

Hi Pru - I also suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. Like you I would like to be more sociable but tend - instead - to avoid too much contact with other people as it makes me anxious to be around a lot of people. I love classical music too (I like Bach, Rachmaninov, Mahler, early choral music, Gregorian chant etc) and I also find that getting out into nature is the best thing for my mental health. I like going on really long walks in the countryside with my husband and youngest  son (who are both also autistic).

We tend to keep in our comfort zone too (when we can anyway!) but lately I’ve thought it might be nice to have one or two friends. I came on here because I thought it would be a good way to start being a bit more friendly towards people - to connect with other people more.

so: hi! 

Welcome, Pru.

I'm hoping that an old Family Friend will help me set up a Polytunnel. The plan is for me to grow my own potatoes, with a man I know building raised beds - with his son - for me.

I like most music, but am Indie at Heart. Listen to Radio X when driving. I grew up with the likes of Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Oasis, Blur and Supergrass. Now, I've evolved towards Bob Dylan, The Velvet Underground, Joy Division, The Fall and The Stone Roses.

Hi Pru,

No need to say you're sorry at the end,

Welcome to the forum, many of us have exacrly the feelings as you, so understand.

Bill.

ps. Will you come and do my garden, i've only got weeds growing.