Published on 12, July, 2020
I'm not a fan of them. Even as a little girl I never got excited for my birthday, in fact the weeks leading up to it were always filled with dread and this is something that's never changed.
My birthday is next month and I'm already dreading it. People keep asking me what I want, should we do a party, am I excited...
It must sound like I'm not grateful, I actually am grateful for the thought and care but as with every year I just want to stay in my room and wait for the day to be over. Everyone fusses and the majority know I don't like my birthday or celebrating but they do it anyway.
If it was a quiet occasion it would be much better and I wouldn't have such a big problem with it but it's never a quiet occasion and by the end of the day I'm always exhausted and nearing a meltdown.
There's still a month to go but I'm anxious already. If I'm really lucky they will forget it this year and I can carry on like normal.
Ooh they are all amazing! That's a really hard one!!! I love Maximus too... He's the reason why I would love a horse now
I'm guessing your favourite Frozen character is Anna? In Frozen I think my favourite character is Hans. I just love how nice he is and how dedicated to Anna he is. Like a true gentleman.
Kitty said:I planned so many things to say and do and it literally went the complete opposite way. I ended up having meltdowns and went home again.
Kitty said:I've noticed in life you can plan so much but it never tends to work out the way you plan. That's been my experience with a lot of things now.
I like planning and it can help reduce anxiety. However when something doesn't go to plan that's when we autists can really struggle, resulting in meltdown or shutdown.
Kitty said:Will you be going anywhere this year?
Not sure yet. It's hard to plan anything currently as I'm looking after my elderly mum and her health is poor.
Kitty said:maybe I could go to Devon or something.
That sounds good. Devon is lovely
Whos your favorite character(s)? I cant decide between Varian, Cass, and Eugene.
Thank you Yes I have! I've seen pretty much everything related to Tangled and Disney. I like how your username is related to Frozen as well. I should have done that for mine with Tangled.
Kitty said:I love your PFP. Frozen are great films
Thank you! I like your pfp too. Have you watched the series of Tangled?
I find birthdays - like Xmas - are the most stressful times of my life. Considering it's only one day I can't help but obsess and feel overwhelmed by panic.
Former Member I love your PFP. Frozen are great films.
I do like other peoples birthdays though
I often look in from the outside at my family members birthdays and an curious as to how they are so excited and enjoy the parties. It's something I wonder what it feels like to actually enjoy birthdays.
That's what it feels like to me a lot of the time.
Aww. That's really sad that after all that planning it didn't go as planned. When I was about 7 there was a sleep over which I was oddly invited to, didn't want to go but my parents both agreed it would be good for me and I planned so many things to say and do and it literally went the complete opposite way. I ended up having meltdowns and went home again.
I've noticed in life you can plan so much but it never tends to work out the way you plan. That's been my experience with a lot of things now.
Autonomistic said:As an adult I do usually try and 'celebrate' my birthday by going on holiday, to give it some positive association and mark the occasion
Will you be going anywhere this year?
I might start doing this... I'm 19 this year, not exactly an important age but maybe I could go to Devon or something.
No not really. I'm lucky in that there are never any celebrations to overwhelm me, as the only person who knows when my birthday is is my mum. The last (and only) time I've ever had a birthday party was when I was 7. That was enough to put me off them for life.
It wasn't until I attended primary school that I became aware that other children had birthday parties, but I wasn't invited. Around the time of the Silver Jubilee street parties my mum tried to help and took it upon herself to speak to the other parents in the neighbourhood and invite their children to a birthday party at my house. I was so excited and planned the event with military precision, what games were going to be played and in what order. Unfortunately the day itself was a complete disaster. The other children were just interested in playing amongst themselves, doing silly dances, etc. Any attempts I made to get any of them to join in with any of the activities I had planned were completely ignored. I remember not being able to understand what I had done wrong and I was so upset afterwards
As an adult I do usually try and 'celebrate' my birthday by going on holiday, to give it some positive association and mark the occasion. When that isn't possible it is just another day and really does not feel like anything to celebrate. The older I get the less I want any more birthdays.
My experience of birthdays as a kid was that everyone else seemed to be made a fuss of or had a party or whatever but my birthday was always ignored or forgotten.
It just felt like another of those things that I just didn’t know the rules of.
just another day for me. no different to any other.
I wonder if there is a correlation of disliking your birthday and being autistic. Ive always didnt like my birthday and any autistic friends I have/had also hated when their birthday came around.
I do like other peoples birthdays though. I like to remember them and compare the date with other peoples. And I always try to say happy birthday even if they dont like birthdays because people forget my birthday a lot (including my family sometimes) so I think its nice to know someone remembered
I used to really want to do something big for them, like it was my day where I was considered important for a change, but I've found myself stressing myself over plans more often than not.
I realise as I've gotten older, I don't need a big celebration or whatever. I'd be happy if only the people I kept close cared.
I really dislike my birthday. I hate being centre of attention so try to get everyone to forget about it as much as possible.
That's the problem: when you spend most of your time trying to hide away and then suddenly for a day everyone sees you and wants to talk it's a nightmare.
Phone calls from family on my birthday are the worst part for me. I've never been any good at talking on the phone. I have no idea what to say to people.
Aw I'm sorry. X
A holiday sounds nice. Where would you like to go? My Gran and Grampy went to Venice for my Grans 60th birthday.
I solved the awkwardness of my 50th, I was offered a party or a break to Italy. Just the wife and I went to Italy, no contact with the outside world and the sun on my back. Perfect.
Nobody even remembered my birthday this year
I really dislike my birthday. I hate being centre of attention so try to get everyone to forget about it as much as possible. I turn 50 this year and I've told my other half I don't want any celebrations. I even dread the text messages and awkward phone calls from family members.