Have our lives been stolen from us?

Did you ask her if she'd be comfortable with said offer beforehand? I have known of female friends (who are not single) who would feel a bit iffy about me sending them gifts, even if it's just in a friendly context.

Not because they wouldn't appreciate it but because of the optics. A card should be fine but anything beyond that, I'd probably be a bit more careful.

She was a fellow drama group member who I was friendly with. We'd talked about the possibility of spending time together outside of drama group but hadn't actually done so. She knew I wasn't trying to initiate a romantic relationship, she was married.

I'm still known in my local community; even though I hardly venture out, anymore.

To be honest, I'm concerned about the direction we're facing.

The Long March through the institutions.

I do feel like life has passed me by, for sure. But blaming society for not including us is a rough bet. Is our struggling to fit in a symptom of society's failures? Maybe. The purpose of a community is to promote mutual growth through using the strengths of some to cover for the weaknesses of others, after all. On the other hand, putting the responsibility on the community to accept and embrace us is Social Darwinism at work. If we stop making an effort to fit in, then instead of society, we take responsibility for our alienation entirely upon ourselves.

I'm here on this site because I feel lonely, isolated and directionless. I'm hoping through engaging with you all here, opportunities to overcome that will present themselves. I'd like to make friends with people who understand what I'm going through. Learn from people who have overcome problems I'm facing. And hopefully before too long, figure out how to fit in with a larger community.

Yeh no worries. I like sharing. Interesting you say this because my grandad never had a measles jag either yet has Asperger’s/level 1 autism. So I actually am thinking that measles the viral infection might cause autism. I was reading in a book recently about some scientific studies that question whether natural measles viral infection could perhaps cause autism or at least play a part in the pathogenesis. A couple of interesting things I noted: I received MMR jag at 3 yrs old yet at 7 I developed a bad case of the measles virus. This is nearly impossible or it’s supposed to be. Because MMR is supposed to eliminate risk of later contracting measles. So the fact that I caught it at 7 would suggest I always had it. Like a case of persistent measles that several scientists have spoken about. What if measles naturally infected some people with weaker immune systems and spread through the family genetically causing all the neurological issues seen in severe measles cases like seizures, epilepsy, myoclonus, tremor, social impairment etc. I dunno I have my theories. That’s all they are theories. 

Hi YT.

Thanks for sharing your experience. However, I just want to balance that by saying that I never had a measles vaccination (not available in the 1960s) but I'm still autistic - I know that I was this way since birth.

I dunno maybe they have. But who stole it from us? Who was it? I can’t help but feel the same way, I feel as though life was stolen from me. I remember being a normal boy happy and enjoying life when I was very young and then something changed almost over night. I’m not saying vaccines cause autism but I remember this change happening after getting my first measles vaccine. I was running away from the nurse saying please leave me alone. She didn’t listen. Is this what caused my autism I dunno. But that’s how I remember it happening. You can call me crazy all you want but that’s all I remember happening. I don’t know the science behind it. No one does but something happened that changed me and getting that injection is the only thing I remember happening that could have made me change so suddenly. I was constantly sick after this and had to take a lot of time out of school I also became extremely shy and introverted. Not wanting to share with other children etc. I would have nightmares of being locked away from everyone else in a massive tower separated from all the other humans. Will I ever find out the truth? Will I ever find out what truly happened to make me change into a shell overnight? I dunno maybe or maybe not. But I hope that by sharing this here I can get some price of mind. I don’t know what you all will think about this but it’s just my experience. I have never shared this with anyone before until now. 

I thought I had "made it" in my 20s - no career success, but I was married and felt I had a good family life and a few friends. In my 30s it all went horribly wrong - husband made redundant from his job, we were on benefits, family & friends turned against us. It only started getting better after I turned 40. I sympathise with you and hope life gets better for you soon

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It depends on the friendship level whether or not it's appropriate to give a gift. I take it that you are male, and because she is female she may have been wondering if you were trying to initiate a romantic relationship when she didn't want that type of relationship with you.

Friendships are extremely complicated.

Here is an article explaining the 4 levels of friendship and what to expect:

socialself.com/.../

I feel there's more context to it than just that though. Was this someone who was merely a colleague or someone who had already expressed that they didn't want you to speak to them on that level?

The same, if not worse, exists within the gay community, speaking from my own experiences as an older gay man, given the experiences that I’ve had within the gay community up to 18 years ago. For me as a traditional Catholic, it is a moral issue, one of moral and ethical values and that those in power have lost their moral compass and are morally bankrupt.

Yes. I definitely feel as if life is passing me by. And definitely persecuted for differences that I'm not even aware of. I even got told once that someone felt uncomfortable because I'd offered her a birthday present! Do neurotypicals not offer people birthday presents? What's so different about me doing it!!?