I am romantically interested in someone who is autistic

I’m baffled why you would insert such a comment. To equate the archaic and damaging concept of sinfulness with someone’s disability is profoundly disturbing. I’m not sure the person who posted gave any indication that they are Catholic to merit such a response, and even if they are it is still not appropriate to speak in this way. I think it is safe to say that the majority of people do not actually care one jot what the Catholic Church has to say about such things.

I really appreciate your response and it is comforting. I have been thinking similar thoughts. Recently he pushed me away and told me to be with someone else but still wants me to contact him. I've spent days upset and looking for an answer. Previously he's told me he wants to see me and be intimate but he wont because his situation its complex and he's struggling in general.

If you really hope to have him let you in, it won’t be any one declaration that breaks him down, it will be routine made of regular contacts.

A silver lining can be seen in this, given its slow start it can be hard to appreciate, however rigid he is in his apprehension, will be evident in his love of you should you succeed.

If you succeed the complex will become simple and the confusing will become clear. He may not be able to declare his purpose too easily but the well trodden exposure of a purposeful trail will render that trouble obselete.

I wish you a lovely journey and thanks for the reply, I feel a lot myself in this man, so your adventure here feels particularly heroic..:)

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That's just awful, everyone deserves to be loved and to love. 

I feel thankful that attitudes have changed since then and become more relaxed. Deeming it sinful for people with disabilities and/or mental health issues to have romantic relationships strikes me as extreme. I imagine their lives must have been rather miserable.

The traditional teaching of the Catholic Church has always been (before Vatican II) that if one has any sort of disability or mental health issue, that one should refrain from becoming romantically involved with anyone as it is considered gravely sinful in all cases 

I somehow missed your comment. Thank you for your help. I have started learning a hobby which he is passionate about, for my interest but also to be able to connect with him. We've had some good discussions. I am trying to be there for him, unless he tells me he doesn't want my friendship anymore

he certainly is, he seems to be struggling more now the longer he is in this situation. I feel sometimes i might say something that can trigger his depression, it can be anything, he then becomes distant. He would never admit to it. I have been trying to help him build his confidence i hope it has helped then it might give him false hope. Its really difficult i get very upset, i care about him a lot i don't know what to do for the best. 

I know it's difficult, but from what you say he seems deeply troubled and unable to sustain a romantic relationship.  

I'm pleased to help.

He was OK when we first met, now he's not interested in life in general, and i just don't understand him,  i keep thinking he's interested but maybe he has alternative motives to our friendship. Thank you, it is also difficult to walk away from this type of situation 

Think about your wellbeing and health first.  Autistic guys, especially with difficulties can be stuck in self destructive patterns of frustration and self loathing, latching onto anything or anyone who gives us the least bit of stability.

Sometimes walking away is the best option.

I hope this helps and I wish you good luck!

tbh I am already emotionally tired I am fighting a battle i cannot win. I need to consider walking away 

It may turn into codependency, be careful and know when you are close to emotional burnout.

You need to think of Your own needs as well.

I agree, i had no idea he had autism until i met him. He's ended it many times, i assume because he convinced no one will be interested in him and possibly he doesn't want to put in the effort or doesn't know how.

Thank you! 

That's why it's better to get to know somebody well before You date them.
Your expectations may have preceded the reality.
I wish You both the very best.

Hi there, thank you.

I talk to him mostly every day with the intention of getting to know each other and hoping he will let me into his life. I don't know what else i can do. 

He finds life in general complex and confusing, its quite sad, he needs a purpose but doesn't know how to achieve it.

Despite the tribulous nature of this post, I find it quite encouraging, simply because it exists.

But as an observation, autistic persons tend to do better with procedure, so establishing a routine or goal that communicates or manifests your intention may work better than any declaration ever could.

Perhaps it’s not that he is not-interested in relationships, and he is not-interested in complexity, perhaps he is more-interested in simplicity. Over time it may equate to a big love made of many layers..:)