Published on 12, July, 2020
I dated an autistic guy in February this year since then we have been talking, i really like him, I've told him how i feel, and I want a relationship, but he is struggling after losing his job 3 months ago and wont commit to seeing me again. He's recently opened up to me and said he struggles to fit in, he has nothing to bring to a relationship, his life is complicated and he is struggling. He has no friends, and no girlfriend for 10 years, I am doubtful if he's ever had a girlfriend and i am not sure if this is another reason he wont date me again as he has no confidence in himself. I keep getting frustrated with the situation, it's affecting him and he gets down. he's told me he likes me but cannot tell me how he feels when i ask him. He can easily walk away with no emotions, and i get upset. Clearly he's not interested in a relationship but enjoys my company i feel maybe i am comforting him as he also said he's lonely. He longs for something meaningful but cannot see the bigger picture. We met on a dating site so I am hoping he's just going through a hard time. I keep telling myself to be patient and he will change and want to see me. I would like some advice what to do with the situation as I am not autistic.
Despite the tribulous nature of this post, I find it quite encouraging, simply because it exists.
But as an observation, autistic persons tend to do better with procedure, so establishing a routine or goal that communicates or manifests your intention may work better than any declaration ever could.
Perhaps it’s not that he is not-interested in relationships, and he is not-interested in complexity, perhaps he is more-interested in simplicity. Over time it may equate to a big love made of many layers..:)
Hi there, thank you.
I talk to him mostly every day with the intention of getting to know each other and hoping he will let me into his life. I don't know what else i can do.
He finds life in general complex and confusing, its quite sad, he needs a purpose but doesn't know how to achieve it.