Anxiety - how do you cope?

Thanks Roy - I’m going to try this. I checked out the ingredients and it has lots of things in it that I really like. Thanks for the recommendation!

This is a product that I’ve found really helpful, after a bath a lot of anxiety just seems to go. I then normally have sleepy tea and listen to an audiobook. I’ve recommended it to a few people and had really good feedback. Boots the chemist sell it for £5.99, The chain ‘Savers’ sell it for £2.99!

There are real things in life which are worth being mindful about. Preventive.

I would suggest long term you find a puppy who will turn into a watch dog. But I would spend time researching dogs for the right one, not just for personality and lifestyle, but one who will have a connexion to also care for your other dog. But perhaps one who will need a ritual of exercise, maybe part husky?

This kind of being anxiety can be due to a wealth of built up unresolved issues or even unresolved understanding, which most of us experience. How does society function? How do humans connect? What makes a bumblebee fly. They could be extensive or even unresolved matters from relationships. I might suggest to see if you can't just buy a small notebook or a plain notebook and try writing things down. There's no overnight fix. But one needs to explore everything setting the self on edge. And find a sort of grounding - perhaps a spiritual one and also a physical one (knitting, yoga, walking, etc.)

Thank you - I think the book might be helpful it looks really good  - thank you for the recommendation. I’ve been doing some sewing and that has helped - I’ve been repairing and altering lots of clothes (although now I’ve run out of things to repair!). I really appreciate your suggestions, it’s so kind of you. Anxiety can make you feel quite lonely at times - even though I have a loving husband and children. 

I feel the same it's also nice to have someone who understands as well, I don't know if you have come across this book but I also find this helpful "The Guide to Good Mental Health on the Autism Spectrum" I'm always dipping in and out of it. When I am anxious I do my Jigsaw puzzle or adult colouring I find this helps.

Thank Shardovan - I will get the book you mention. I would be incredibly grateful for even the briefest respite from my anxiety at this point, as I’m finding it so hard to cope with. I’m really struggling to cope at the moment. I’m sorry you’ve experienced so much pain from this too. It’s so hard. Solidarity my friend. 

I'd say 80% of my anxiety is controlled by medication as it helps my mind rid of the silly worried thoughts that would often float around in my head but still leaves room for my logical thought process to remain active.

Obviously keeping my mind ticking over either by work or hobbies helps stop my mind from having the time to do too much think too so creates less anxiety also.

Thanks - I will look at getting these, thanks for letting me know :) 

I really like crystals too - I really love semi precious gemstones. Like you I love rose quartz ( I have some rose quartz bracelets which I associate with feelings of calm and comfort. I also love Chrysoprase as I find it to be a really uplifting and optimistic colour. I don’t have a thumb worry stone but I’d like to get one I think. 
im sorry you struggle with anxiety too -  it’s so difficult to live with isn’t it?  Anything that helps is so valuable. I find holding a hot water bottle (with a furry cover) very comforting when I’m really anxious. Thanks for your reply - I really appreciate it. It’s nice to talk to someone who understands. 

Hi Kate

My diffuser that I have got is a steam one I add water then the oil and it's a colour change one aswell 

I have used loads of fidget toys in the past but my 3 favourite are fidget simple dimple keyring, pop it fidget toy ( I use this one in the house) and a pop it spinner

But I also use a a thumb worry stone crystal ( I have a tiger's eye gold), Amethyst and a rose quartz) as this helps with my anxiety and skin picking 

Hope this helps 

I love lavender oil too - and lots of other essential oils. I really like a blend from Tisserand at the moment called ‘Sleep better’ - it’s a lovely soothing oil. I used to burn a lot of incense too but decided to use this less as the smoke is not really healthy if you’re burning it every day. Can you recommend a good fidget gadget? I looked at these but there were so many and I wasn’t sure which would be good - so gave up on the idea for a while. 

Hi Jess

Do  you like the smell of lavender, when I have anxiety I put on my essential oil diffuser and put  a few drops of lavender oil in it  that makes me relax I also read and do jigsaw puzzles or use fidget gadgets ( there are lots of different ones available

Hope this helps 

Julie 

Not very well, I have my fidget cube with me 24/7 at the moment 

I’m glad that your daughter is being helped by that medication, sounds like it’s been something of a game changer. It’s interesting you should mention antihistamines as I’ve been finding that Loratadine - which I take for hay fever anyway- seems to take the edge off just a little bit. I have to ration my remaining diazepam carefully, so having a plan B that’s over the counter offers a bit of an alternative coping strategy. Even the ‘non drowsy’ ones do make me quite tired, but I’d rather that than the alternative. 

I've read all the replies with great interest and really hope everyone can find their own little bit of peace somehow. I can't add much other than mentioning that Promethazine (which is just an over the counter med usually used as an anti-histamine) has been a bit of a life saver for my daughter during her most anxious times. She gets so anxious that she hallucinates really badly and can get into quite a dangerous state where she is capable of doing all sorts of things. If she takes 25mg of Promethazine if she feels she is likely to go into one of those states, it really helps and I would say it has actually prevented many trips to A&E. It does act as a sedative, so isn't ideal if you need to drive, but she does sometimes take 10mg before school if she feels she needs to (although I think this dose has more of a placebo effect). It takes an hour or so to kick in so you need to be pro-active and aware of when you might need it, but I would really recommend having some in the house/your bag for those really difficult times.  

That's really well put. I really identify with the 'never goes away' dimension, and the mind choosing times of rest to double down on the awfulness. I'd say that for me, anxiety is on a good day present as constant background radiation, and on a bad one I'm just completely composed of it - it consumes me. Sleep is the only true release, and maybe the blissful 30 seconds or so when regaining consciousness - before the first thought kicks in and starts the ball rolling again. The recent ASD diagnosis has helped a lot with understanding why techniques that others find very beneficial (meditation, medication, throwing themselves into an activity)more typically only take the edge off a bit for me. I became entirely resistant to Sertraline, Venlaxafine etc. within months/weeks of starting them, and I now realise that autistic people don't feel the benefits in the same way. All I was left with were awful side effects (weight gain, restless limbs, insomnia), so I came off them. I recently asked my GP's permission to get 28 diazepam every 6 months and ration them to avoid addiction. They help a little bit, I think, but not as much as they would an NT with anxiety of the more regular kind. 

I'm tortured with rumination over events that most people seemingly would (horrifically in my opinion - I'm not sure I'd ever trade my suffering for their eventual, or sooner, coldness/indifference) get over after a briefer spell. I honestly think I'll spend the rest of my life striving for some sort of radical acceptance about deep hurt and confusion about some stuff - the iron price for briefer, more miraculously happy times. I wouldn't change those for the world so I know I shouldn't complain. It's just very hard to walk this path alone, without closure or the likelihood of ever mending bridges. Life is just very hard most of the time now. Managing anxiety can sometimes be about getting through the next five minutes, then the next. 

It's weird - for the briefest of moments about three years ago, I was helped enormously by Tolle's The Power of Now. It's still worth re-visting that (audio)book time and time again (I may need to do so very soon to stay sane), but it's almost like the universe played a bit of a cosmic joke on me. It let me have that brief peace, even let some profoundly wonderful situations enter my life through the different energy it gave me. Then things went off the rails in ways I still can't even fully understand - and the punchline seemed to be 'OK, now try embracing the 'suchness' of *this* eternal moment and see how you get on - byeee'. And, like an addict trying to get back that first hit, my subsequent attempts to re-access that state of grace have had much less effectiveness. Still just enough, on a good day,  to be worthwhile, but - again- only taking the edge off the existential horror and unrelenting despair of not being designed to ever fit in. 

And yet, would I trade in my neurodivergent brain for a more normal one? I don't think so. The inevitable  suffering is unbearable at times, but to gain a calmer default state but lose my ability to stand obliquely to things and sometimes know with lonely certainty that I'm part of a sane minority in a population otherwise designed to be unconcsiously insane, who contradict themselves blindly at every turn, and run breakneck in pusuit of societal box-ticks that are based on fitting in, not true individualism? No thanks, I'll take the unending pain instead. 

I know all I've done is vent rather than offer something positive. Sorry! Though maybe do try that book if you haven't already - it's got some important insights about how to cope with existence that certainly can't hurt to know.

Honestly, keep yourself distracted. Anxiety and stress are two ideas that will never fully go away. They'll always hover over you, sometimes heavily sometimes more subtly. The worst is when you have too much free time and allow your mind to wander off into fucked up areas.

Personally, I like to go to the gym to release stress, listen to my favorite albums, pick up the guitar, or go around the city with my camera. And also, for some reason, caffeine somehow subdues my anxiety levels.

Also, a couple hits off a joint can't omegle.2yu.co hurt.

I’m sorry to hear that Becky. I understand it - I struggle so much with anxiety and at times it’s driven me to have suicidal thoughts. It’s such a difficult thing to live with - especially when it goes on for months and years. Over the last few months my anxiety has been totally overwhelming. In the past I’ve used alcohol to help me cope with my anxiety. I have a quite low tolerance for alcohol so in a way that was good as I never really went over about 3 units a night. It dulls the anxiety. I had a really serious physical illness late last year though so haven’t had much alcohol since as I feel it’s bad for my recovery. I still have it sometimes though if I am feeling really desperate. I only wish I could get really good help from the nhs for my anxiety - but that’s not easy to access sadly. We are all doing our best aren’t we? Trying to cope with dreadful anxiety on your own is really hard. 

I've used alcohol as well. Specifically wine. It numbs the anxiety and stress for a little while. Usually I'll have a glass or three every night which can't be good for me but it helps so I do it. If my anxiety gets severe and really bad and I can't cope in the past I've tried to commit suicide to escape it - not proud of that, but sometimes it feels like the only way out. Last time it was that bad was February.

Most of us have probably already been to the GP. I am actually going to ask for medication now as councelling implies I have time to work through the tasks but I can’t do that in a workplace when the condition seems perminent. 

I’m ashamed to say that I’ve used alcohol for all of my adult life to try and combat anxiety. I know it’s not the answer and it is a depressive but it’s how I cope. I have been a lot better recently, it’s only been 4 months since  I’ve known that I’m autistic. It’s a very big learning curve. I have started treating me better and feel a lot more positive.