Bordem

I've been struggling with the same Situation. I devour books, I used to play games and surfing but lately I have no time to do so.  Gym has become boring. The ONLY time I actually have some fun is when I'm learning something new, or at yoga class and even then it gets boring after a while. Is this how it's suppose to be? I feel a Little Lost and without a purpose in life. I Also feel extremely tired and without energy. Social interactions are draining more of me now, than ever...

Mhara said:

The ONLY time I actually have some fun is when I'm learning something new,

and then you continue doing those things out of routine

the most important question - what is my purpose - has no answer so far

only meetings with my friends (I have 3 friends), when we practise ''modern philosophy'' manage to continue to give me some fun. we usually get drunk in a process or at least get tipsy.

Mhara said:

The ONLY time I actually have some fun is when I'm learning something new,

and then you continue doing those things out of routine

the most important question - what is my purpose - has no answer so far

only meetings with my friends (I have 3 friends), when we practise ''modern philosophy'' manage to continue to give me some fun. we usually get drunk in a process or at least get tipsy.

I only eat vegetables with meat.

maybe next time, it's not always polish food, i know many receipes, including vegan and vegetarian

When are you making some nice Polish food!?

I miss chefing

I had  a job as a KP, lasted 2 months, pretending to be friendly while making jokes about autistic people.

I am stuck with minimum wage jobs too, qualifications isn't enough top get a good job, you need experience too.

but I do like cooking so I make dinner parties for my friends, 

Yeah definitely typing is better than writing by hand wieredly I can paint better than I can right as my hand righting is terrible but typing I can more or less do without even looking at the key board.

Of course you can. I've been doing a lot of exams in the past years but apparently there is no cause. It's been linked to anxiety, stress and external stimulation (lights and sounds). There is some trace of abnormal electrical activity in my brain that indicates that I'm prone to seizures but when the drugs are removed in controled environment, I don't have them. I will in 'normal' situations though. I'm a bit undecided on what to do concerning my meds, because they do help me. I've had seizures 3 times a week before and they reduce to once a year, to none. 

I also try to jot down what I think but lately there's not much time for my own ideas. just medical thoughts, not mine own, but school related things. (sooo many!) I kinda lost life as I knew it lol

I used to smoke some time ago but that wasn't beneficial. It did make me feel good in a number of ways, but it wasn't good for my memory, once again. :(  (what a shame! xD)

Yeah I know you what mean probablem with Warhammer is I feel I've exled at as much as I can and no longer find it chslanging. Find getting work hard due to my ASD/ADHD but I want a job down side is I don't have the genius mind set that comes with Autism due to my Dispraxi canceling it out. So lack in qualifications and can only apply for basic minum wage jobs which don't really teach me anything I already know and they lack progression as manager pay isn't worth the hours or money. I miss chefing though and want to get back in to that problem is with chefing is well chefs are ass holes and don't empathise with my conditions or make comparises like most jobs due to lack of understanding.

that's why I don't take meds, all make you slow in thinking, and everything else, and supposed effect  won't happen unless I want it, so in fact this the only thing that influences the outcome - my resolution. and they all damage your digestive system. Occassionally I get some substances from other sources though, very much like Dr Walter Bishop from Fringe LOL

my journal contains all my crazy ideas so I don't forget them, it has happened for sure, but sure sure can I be? if it's something that originated in my head and never left it, how much was lost to the sea of forgetfulness?

what is the cause for seizures if I may ask?

I can relate. My handwritting goes down the drain when I get tired. Sometimes I can't even understand what I wrote after a while! computers are your friends. Lol I started a journal not so long ago as well. Charting symptoms, meltdowns, sleeping charts and relevant days, good and not so good, among other stuff. One thing I noticed is that seizures and the drugs for them made my memory become way worse than what it was. (It used to be great, now it's great for my interests! lol)

To be honest I have an ongoing project for a novel. But writing was never my strong side, Downside of good memory. I struggled to maintain notebooks at school simply because I did not need them. And my writing was shunned by literature teachers so I stopped at the begining of college and started to copy work of others to get better grades. and then nothing for a long time until I had to write thesis at the end of college here. But there is some progress, I started sort of journal a year ago

Exactly lol except I can't (shouldn't) drink anymore because I take drugs for my seizures, so I try to do it on special occasions ONLY. I've had the same 4 friends for the past 20 years, even though 2 of them are away we talk regularly. Those neverending talks do rock. We're writting (trying lol) a book! Maybe you can try!