I feel like the world is ending

Hi Jakey

Whilst I do not share all your problems I do fully understand how the news makes you feel. It was like the politics of misery and despair sought me out everywhere. In the end I appreciated that the negatives of being aware of what was happening far outweighed the benefits. So I left all social media, cancelled my subscription to a broadsheet (online actually) newspaper and arranged at home for my wife to just let me know news items (she still reads news) that is good and encouraging, or terminal (like the nukes are on their way).

She hardly ever has to let me know anything and my mental health is definitely much better for it. A big part of the problem is my utter powerlessness in the face of issues over which I have zero control, in order to thrive I definitely need agency, control and influence, I think this is true for most people, but autism and suicidality clearly tell me that if I cannot influence an issue the best thing to do it is to ghost it. 

Alice

• PALS - The Patient Advice and Liaison Service (PALS) offers confidential advice, support and information on health-related matters. You may like to contact them, information is here: What is PALS (Patient Advice and Liaison Service)? - NHS  
• Samaritans: Call 116 123 for free, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year.  
• Mind Infoline: 0300 1233393 for information and signposting (9am to 6pm, Monday to Friday)   
• SANEline: 0300 304 7000 for anyone experiencing a mental health problem or supporting someone else (4.30pm to 10.30pm, every day)  
• Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM): 0800 58 58 58, for anyone who is struggling or affected by suicide or suicidal thoughts (5pm to midnight every day).    
• Shout 85258: a free, confidential, 24/7 text messaging support service for anyone struggling to cope.  
  We hope this is helpful to you.  

 Jakey hope you're feeling better 

Post edited in relation to rule 7

It is hard not to feel negatively towards things that you’ve turned to in the past but that you feel have not helped. I wouldn’t totally rule them out though, because you never know, they might be just a bit more helpful next time. It’s possible. See how you feel. But if you don’t want to bearing in mind that everything is impermanent- nothing lasts forever - even feeling really terrible cannot last forever. Even if you do nothing at all this feeling you’re experiencing right now will inevitably change.

They might not cut welfare. Often we can worry about lot about things that turn out not to happen. Right at this moment you can’t do anything about that anyway - so ruminating on it is only going to make you feel much worse. Try to put thinking about that to one side as much as you tell - just tell yourself ‘I’ll deal with that later’. Focus on now rather than worrying about what might happen in the future - give yourself permission to have a ‘holiday’ from thinking about the future and possible problems that you can’t actually do anything about right now. Just focus on today. 

To be fair it’s true - they do often read a kind of script. But it’s not a script on here. I tried ringing the Samaritans once and I was surprised that they don’t really say much at all to you really - in terms of helpful advice or whatever. The guy was really nice though, and I appreciated his empathy. But at the same time I was left feeling that he couldn’t actually exactly help me in any way apart from just listening. 

In a nutshell Kate Kestrel  it does help.

It is good to reach out and talk about it on here isn’t it? I find that too. Just knowing that other people are feeling the same way too, or have felt like it, really helps I find. I’m so grateful to people who have the courage to share these things on here - it really helps all of us. We’re not as alone as we often feel we are - I think autistic people often feel very alone because so many of us have difficulties forming social relationships etc. I think that when we’re feeling overwhelmed or suicidal it’s especially important to reach out. 

HiJakey 

I’m sorry to hear about your situation I can understand why you would think that there is only one way to solve this situation. I have been there too and it’s not something that gets solved easily but it does help to have coping mechanisms for when this happens. I try to only think about getting through the next 24 hours sometimes even just the next hour. 

While we’re in this phase we think nothing can change but it will life is like that it’s constantly changing new chapters are coming and new things will happen and new people will come along…there is hope but sometimes it’s hiding behind our own thoughts.

Keep talking to us on here we are here to help and support each other

I think that’s all a lot of people really want - a peaceful life where they can be left alone. You’re living in a broken system that makes a lot of people feel pretty terrible much of the time. My son and his girlfriend are claiming Universal Credit and his girlfriend is struggling to find a job - and they tell me how much it can get them feeling really down and defeated. You’re not alone, and your response to the situation is entirely sane and understandable. Medications for depression and anxiety often aren’t as successful as we are told they will be. When I tried an SSRI felt truly terrible - it made me feel much much worse. I’ve found that the thing that’s helped me most is to change my perspective and how I think and respond to things - in my case this was through studying Buddhism - but there are lots of ways of doing this - like CBT for example. We can’t change the world around us or the political system etc - but we can change how we respond to it, how we deal with the difficult emotions it triggers in us. Often the way we respond to situations is because of conditions from our upbringing too - and understanding all these things can help us to find ways that help ease our nervous system and help calm our responses- so we get less overwhelmed. It can be a nice project to look into all these things and learn about our own psychology and what the roots of it are. For example I had not very loving parents and I find it hard to trust people sometimes. But the more I understand that the better I can be a mitigating some of the effects. It’s really interesting to become a bit of a detective and work out why we think the way we do. 

Yes - for quite a while now have had to go on a bit of a News ‘diet’ - and watch/read much less of it, and I find it’s helped. When I was young the news was something you might happen to watch just once - if it was on at 9 or 10pm or whatever. But now it’s there all the time - 24 hours - and it can be too much. If you’re a sensitive person (and most autistic people are) it can be overwhelming and depressing. It’s a bit like with food: if we have a diet of ‘bad’ food all the time we tend to feel awful. What we consume impacts on how we feel - and if we consume a lot of sad and distressing media it’s bound to start to get us down. 

I agree Desmond. It’s very hard not be affective by the collective madness that we are presented with day after day online and in the News etc. Sometimes you just have to metaphorically close all the doors and windows of your psychological ‘house’ and say ‘enough is enough!’ and refuse to engage with it for a while. It’s not easy to have good mental health in this society. I think people often blame themselves and think they’re broken if they feel overwhelmed - but it’s often partly more about the outer state of things rather than just our own internal state or personal resilience. Good luck with the spuds! I can’t actually eat them because they seem to aggravate my arthritis in my hip (I had hip dysplasia as a child and I get a bit of trouble from it now) - which is a great shame because I absolute love potato - one of my absolutely favourite foods! Especially when combined with a lot of real butter! 

I’m so sorry - that sounds incredible hard. Sometimes it just gets totally overwhelming doesn’t it? Just too much. When I feel overwhelmed I trying to use strategies like grounding techniques, or I go outside for a walk - no matter what the weather is like I find that getting outside calms me down. What things do have that often help to calm your nervous system a bit? I find making something good to eat is often helpful, drinking tea and really focusing on enjoying  the taste of the food and the tea. When everything feels totally horrible I try to find one small thing that I can enjoy (even just a little bit) and really focus on that. There’s no doubt that life is often very hard, and the political situation is pretty dire right now. But there’s not a lot we can do right this minute - here and now - about all the bigger things in this world that are a mess - so right now there’s not much point in dwelling on those things if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Instead try to bring your attention back to anything right in front of you that you can control and enjoy - no matter how simple. The other day I was feeling overwhelmed and I had a waistcoat that needed a small repair doing on it - and just doing a bit of sewing while listening to an interesting podcast really helped me to feel a bit better. Sometimes doing a small, simple task can be really good for overwhelm. We can’t solve all our problems at once, and we definitely can’t solve the world’s political problems, but it can feel stabilising and nourishing to just doing something small for ourselves (or for someone else) that we can take some pleasure from, or some satisfaction from. I really hope you feel better soon, no feeling lasts forever. Many of us experience suicidal thoughts when we feel overwhelmed (I know I have) but it’s always best to just give it time and the intensity of these feels really will start to ease in time. Try to be patient for this feeling to ease - and find something you can do practically to keep you a bit busy while you wait for the intensity to ease. 

I was going to write that you doing something you enjoy can be helpful. I will say to as recently some cases of people who have got into crime and I was thinking they may be lonely in their homes and living with next to no income and feel driven to crime. I live alone but the isolation is too much for some people and they may be better off with with sheltered or in a home of some sort. Getting sheltered home may be easier and quicker than going for a home of your own. Have you ever tried living alone.  It is a generalisation but it is said that women some do better than men living alone.

I do like your advice on the hard times, plugging out from all the chaos sounds really healthy and let's you get back in control. I think that would give you space to breath and focus on the things that bring contentment, rather than the gloom of outlets. 

Analysing and feeling deeply are true for me too. 

Virtual hugs to all who need them.

It's good to just hold space sometimes, and know someone wishes you well tonight.

Yes they do make the system difficult on purpose, to try to make people miserable as they think that will make people want to work, but the opposite is true, as when you get like that everything is harder. Burnout is very hard to deal with, and there is so little research into courses that could actually help, so yeah being pushed around medication in the hope one 'fixes it', would be difficult. 

The world keeps turning though, and it's worth holding out for change. Write to MP's and tell them what's important to you. Sometimes being the voice of all the people like you that are suffering helps, even when you get the dismissive reply, they've had to read it, and if lots of people wrote letters, they would start thinking maybe it's important. It can feel pointless, but the tiny things we do to be heard can add up. 

I hope one day you can move to somewhere that makes you happier.

Everywhere has become a zoo, just a dice roll which type apes we see. 

I have plenty of hobbies which do help me when I'm not in this state. But when I am, I get delayed, procrastinate a lot and can't focus, end up just wanting my misery to be over. It can take me hours to practise one hobby for an hour. 

The News is designed to install fear, into us, while pushing their Sponsors' Produce. That's the long, and short, of it.

Plus, modern cities have become homogenised Zoos. Cities such as London, Belfast, Dublin, Manchester, etc lost their character; and identity. Rural living is better, all round. Even though the pace, rurally, isn't as slow as it used to be.

The best way forward is to find a Hobby/Pastime. I'm growing spuds, in a plot at a Community Garden. Gives me a sense of purpose.

I feel low as well.

I get a bit better by plugging myself off the media for a few weeks.

One reason may be that we are quite analytic but also feel very deeply, and the contradiction and pain becomes unbearable.