Living in the Twilight Zone

 Ok good, my bad!!! Sorry, I can't really read the room. it might have something to do with the autism  I hope all will be well in your future! Have a good evening ^_^

"I said, 'Kiss me, you're beautiful!' These are truly the Last Days!

('The Dead Flag Blues' by Godspeed You! Black Emperor)

I'm going through to much personal things right now, on my mind, i couldn't court you, if i tried!

chococo said:

foul writhing creature beyond mortal comprehension.

Self deprecation... Not fine at all!

I'm all about the offense. Always on the offensive. Intentional or otherwise !

I am a foul writhing creature beyond mortal comprehension. Not fine at all!

Apologies, I can't tell if you are joking

Just in case you aren't joking, I hope you don't mind if I give a bit of advice. When aiming to befriend women, you should avoid talking about their attractiveness unless you are actively trying to court them. Some women will take offense to spontaneous advances.

Sorry if you were joking and I made it awkward 

I don't tell me that, you turning me on Choco   

I imagine you 22, and fine as hell. I have a twisted imagination.

never give up!!!!!!!!!!!!! its isolating being in a community of only NT people. My hometown is like that. It may mean you have to travel, or find communities online, but you can always find someone!! even one person makes a huge difference. for ages, I only really had the one friend. i hope you can find more autistic people. You can always message me! 

I've only ever met a handful of people with autism irl. Though I did get along with them, sort of. But ...yeah, I can see where you're coming from, it's by no means easy.  It's a heatwave right now in UK. lol, a woman can be sweaty, greasy, not washed her hair, and still be considered cute and endearing, but that's...just, women get more slack in that regard, but yeah, the treated like a child thing is universal, belittled, all that. Animal, freak, all that. I only ever met one self admitted autistic woman, i liked her, she was blunt and straight to the point, straight forward. 99% of people i've know are NT. I don't know any local weirdo clubs. It's a saturnalia of NT debauchery and alcoholism, drug use, and NT ways everywhere around me. Id love to meet some nerdy autists i could get along with. But I've given up on, all that!

I see where you are coming from, but everyone is different. Even an attractive woman will only get so far on looks alone; when it comes to forming closer friendships, their autistic traits may cause people to misinterpret their actions or words. And women who AREN'T attractive get bullied relentlessly.

I was BUTT ugly as a kid, I stank, I had no boundaries. I was very off putting LOL! As a teenager, I learned to morph into something more socially acceptable, but it made me miserable. I got to 20, and I was just like, I GIVE UP! Now I dress weird, I say what I want, I talk to whoever I fancy, I like whatever I like. Plenty of people find me annoying and strange. But then, why would I even want to talk to them, anyway?!

It IS hard making friends as an autistic person. That is certainly true. My first year of uni, I had 'friends' but they would go out without me and treated me like I was a child. I have been treated less like a person and more like an animal by people for a lot of my life. Even now, I still get it. At work, at uni, etc.

I have found that making friends with autistic people and other "weird" people has been amazing. I can speak to them candidly about how I feel without fear of being misunderstood. I can be myself.

Gender certainly makes a difference in how one is treated, especially with autism, as women are more likely to mask their features, which may give them a higher degree of social acceptability. It is a topic of deep interest to me as someone whose dissertation will be on the subject!

HOWEVER! We share many problems as well! At the end of the day, male or female, we are still autistic! I get people looking at me like a freak! I get people laughing at me, at the way I dress, the way I look. I get people staring at me judgementally when I speak. Some people SUCK. But some people are really nice. If someone treats you badly, that's THEIR problem, not yours.

Find people with the same interests and geek out about it with them. I'm in an anime society and a gaming society. These people are great! I play DND with my friends! Honestly, half of the reason I'll befriend someone is due to a shared interest! I love being a weirdo, because my friends are weirdos too!!!!!! And I love them!!!!!!!!

Scar tissue - red hot chili peppers... Hmnn yeah, we all have war wounds. But I'm not iron man, more like robocop after the battle with ed209, all shot up but still functioning. Damn I'm such a nerd.

Pagan, that kinda like, reminds me of Italian Catholics with their saints isn't it, they call on saint Michael or whoever, to protect them. Maybe wear little pendants or have a bobble head of Jesus on their dashboard. In hope they wont crash their car. I'm off on another tangent.

Hey, i was just checking out biblically accurate angels the other day...if you called on one of them, and they appeared, you'd probably have nightmares

My first thought you must be a woman... Yeah, 22. A male in your situation might have a completely different take. Woman are generally treated better in society. Especially if they're pretty. You can be pretty woman and weird. Try being a nondescript male and weird. Its a totally different ball game.

I'm a stubborn person, I used to use all this stubborness in a way that hurt me, that confirmed all the negativity about me from outside, then I wondered what would happen if I turned all that stubborness into possitiveness, so I gave it go and it seemed to work, theres still a part of me that does it as a big F**k You to the people who abused and denigrated me, who tried to destroy me to satisfy some sick need in themselves. So now here I am battle scarred, wobbly and determined that I won't be anyones football ever again.

I'm a Pagan so I have lots of Gods and Goddesses to call upon for help and they do listen, they even answer, if you listen carefully and in the right way, just don't expect a phone call!

Just keep your aura teflon coated and let all the crap slide off, even if you do have to reapply the teflon a couple of times a day.

That's wonderful, you have a positive attitude. My journey is...well very bumpy. I'm 36, so...i don't ever expect to recover. I don't know what healing means. There is no recovering from my life. Dark forces is all i've ever known. A scene from fight cub comes to mind.. here it is:

You have to consider the possibility that God doesn't like you, he never wanted you. In all probability, He hates you. This is not the worst thing that can happen...

..Oh never mind me, i've been socializing too much with dark forces lately,and i'm a lil emotionally disturbed

For me, it was great when I didn't realise I was different, then terrible because of how everyone treated me as a child/teenager, and then it was a little better, and now it's great again!

For the longest time, I wondered what was wrong with me. Why people disliked me for things I didn't understand. Having learned about autism, I feel like things finally clicked for me. At university, I have met many autistic friends and many non-autistic people who accept me for who I am. I definitely still get people who treat me like a weirdo, but that's their problem, not mine!!!

I make an effort to be friendly and kind to everyone I meet, and if they don't treat me the same, I don't speak to them!!! There are plenty of people who will like you for you, despite being "weird"! I'm weird too!

My childhood wasn't happy, my adulthood has been better, I've been on a long journey of healing and recovery, I wasn't diagnosed until I was 50. I don't feel that "dark forces" have taken over people I've knpwn for years, largely because there aren't any, I'm bad at keeping up friendships.

I was pigeon holed long before any diagnosis, now I'm not pigeon holed and I won't be pigeon holed, I've taken over the whole roost!

I know a spiritual woman who really believes all this, I on the other hand am more, a touch it, taste, it feel its, only believe in tanglible things .(Although I don't discount metaphysical unknowns) If anybody is candidate for possession its me. But i'm more a Jekyl and hyde. Polite, but i might throw a brick through your window. If i'm made unhinged, ( POSSSESED BY DARK FORCES, whichever you prefer) and NT's can and do trigger me.

Though I find NT's to be more savage than any autistic could ever be. They are so efficiently ruthless. Its this so called 'double empathy' gap.

It's the unleashing of demons.

The devil's in this world. We're witnessing those we used to look up to, and admire, suddenly possessed by Dark Forces.