Published on 12, July, 2020
Are things better? Yes. I've lost weight, I got a stylish haircut, I comb my hair every day, have baths more regularly and use deodorant every day, have more new clothes, I shaved off an unkempt beard, I eat more freshly prepared meals, relations are less strained with my parents, I'm less depressed than I was, I have more energy to do things and enjoy hobbies I'd stopped enjoying like reading, watching TV and doing research.
However, I'm lonely. I know alcohol isn't the answer. I will no longer make excuses about how alcohol can fix things, it will not. I've joined a new National Autistic Society social group where I live and will keep going, hoping for the best. I've only been once and only two other Autistic people attended, there were two people running it as well (it's possible they were Autistic too, for all I know).
On the bright side, three women in local supermarkets I shop at have complimented me on my appearance, one of them said I looked like I've had a makeover, another said I am looking really good and she could hardly believe I was the same person. There's also a man I know who had chatted to me a few times when I was a drunk and he saw the new me and was taken aback and asked me if he could have a selfie with me.
I still have severe anxiety and struggle to demonstrate empathy for others. I'm still finding it hard to make conversation with people and it is often stilted and terse.
Two positive things, the next time I go to the GP, they can not dismiss any of my problems based on alcoholism as that will no longer be relevant, and social services had told me if I got sober they would be looking into giving me one-to-one support so that could be in the pipeline, I asked my social worker at the last meeting and he said I need to be sober for a bit longer first.
Hey, first of all well done! It isn't easy.
I have recently stopped drinking (just over amonth ago now) after a particular incident with a friend where I really hurt them. I came to the conclusion before that that I am probably autistic and booked in an assessment. Going up to when I I stopped drinking, I was drinking more after booking the assesment and being stressed out about it, which ia when the thing with my friend happened.
I had my assesment the weekend just gone and found out that I am definitely autistic. It's not a surprise but explains how I was using alcohol to mask who I really am and am now struggling a bit with figuring that out.
As everything is so new, I haven't been to my GP to see what help I can access through them (private diagnosis because of the stupid long lists) so will be doing this once I have everything and have read it all and processed it.
I hope you manage to get the help you need!
Bravo
Hi Yellow Tree, the evidence suggests that alcohol addiction tends to come from using it for self-medicating purposes, not simply the buzz on gets from it.
If you want to talk about it, I'll try to listen. I can understand your frustration with the NHS. It's good you stopped.
Yeh it could be a masking tool or it could just be plain addictive to autistic people because of the neurobiology. Alcohol is a powerful drug that produces a euphoric high because it binds to and activates dopamine receptors in the brains reward centre. I didn’t drink to mask or anything. I just drank because I loved feeling euphoric. That’s probably the reason why anyone drinks I guess.
I have stopped drinking alcohol as well.
What started out as a coping strategy to deal with stress, burnout and loneliness transformed into a habit and then drinking increasing amounts over the last few years. I realised it was a problem, but kept going back to it.
Had numerous health issues related to it and now I seem to have done permanent damage to my body. I'm past the hardest part now and my body is beginning to heal, but I'm having a lot of feelings of self-loathing and guilt over what I've done to myself.
I wish the NHS had helped me. I asked my GP multiple times if they could help me but they are so overburdened and underfunded that I basically don't matter. Anyway, I have stopped now (hopefully won't start again) but the damage is already done.
Congratulations on stopping drinking alcohol. There is evidence coming to light that suggest alcohol is often used as a coping mechanism / masking tool for people with ASD.I hope you get positive responses from other services, because expecting you to abstain from alcohol for some time they imagine is correct sounds very unfair. Maybe I could suggest re-engaging with social services and ask them to provide you with an Autism trained or Autistic social worker. You may find engagement is easier when your needs are better understood.
Well done for achieving this I understand that this is a massive step for you. Keep it up and I’m pleased for you.
Congratulations.
This is a huge step.
Well done.
one is too many, a thousand's ot enough.
Roswell said:they can not dismiss any of my problems based on alcoholism
For this alone, it is a boon. Plus the enhanced quality of life.
That’s great. You’re doing a good job. It’s not easy when you find alcohol addictive. It’s that dopamine hit you get when drinking that’s hard to kick. I think with all the help you’re getting you’ll be fine though. They can give you medication to help your cravings. I tried to get out on it at one point but they told me I didn’t have a problem with alcohol and discharged me lol. It’s not easy though. Best of luck.
My social worker has been explaining to me how other people perceive me when I'm drunk and explained why people were upset by things I did in the past while drunk, and also explained to me general expectations people have around how people interact. And at the same time I've been going to see an addiction counselor and he's explained to me how all heavy drinkers are more or less the same, people make excuses, they drink because they're happy to enhance that, because they're sad to escape it, because it's raining outside, because someone's annoying them, it becomes the apparent answer to everything when really it's an addiction. I've only been sober a few days but due to how depressed and bored of everything I had become I'm determined this time to stick to sobriety. With the counselor's advice I started reducing the daily amount I had and measuring it. I went from one and a half litres of rum a day down to 1 litre, then started buying the small hand-sized bottles, one of them a day, then half of one of them a day, then a third, and then I started having dry days and now I've stopped completely.
Well done! How did you manage to stop? How long have you been off for?
Thank you. Myself, even one drink is a potential slippery slope but if you can enjoy it in moderation, I salute you.
Thanks. Hooray for evolution!
Much appreciated, thank you.
Thank you.
Well done for giving up the booze
Well done Roswell, I’m pleased for you.