I am feeling so alone in my marriage.

You could ask him along to couples therapy. If not then perhaps some counselling is what you would need for yourself, the counsellor will help you work through what is best for you in this situation. 

In the meantime I know it is difficult, but try to find yourself, and the things you like to do for you. 

I hope things get better for you. 

You deserve to be happier. 

If he goes out with people then I assume he has at least a basic understanding of social norms and fitting into them. Also, nothing gives him the freedom to yell at you and be aggressive. That behavior is on him to fix.

I think he could talk openly with you and meet you in the middle. As everyone else has said, single is better than alone with someone else.

Sorry you are feeling very lonely in your relationship OP. I do question the validity of the reported autism here though, it's not often you get an autistic person who would rather go out to socialize with many people when we more frequently attach to one or two people with a strong intensity, actually it makes me worry for you because if the autism is a misdiagnosis, some advice we give here could be even worse than simply unhelpful. Your situtation here has been only barely covered in an abridged 5 sentences, one of which seems to run contrary to another. I can't help but think what if we give advice taking it at face value he is autistic, but in actual fact he has borderline personality disorder, narcissism, or any other thing that has ever been misdiagnosed as autism and vice versa? Because you also said he would rather be "talking to himself" than talking to you.
I think it best if I offer you more generalised advice based on this concern and this is as he is getting aggressive and you don't have kids, you are actually in  the best position to escape if he ever crosses the line and becomes outright violent, he shouldn't be shouting and getting aggressive with you  just for trying to talk to him anyway, autism (genuine or not) isn't an excuse, and that is abusive behaviour. Please don't stick in a bad relationship out of some sense of loyalty to someone who doesn't love you back. You might not bear the thought of not being in a relationship now, but if you already feel lonely in the relationship you might as well cut free and find someone who will love you back as much as you are prepared to love them in return.

JT said:

I would also say that children would only amplify this problem. A distant partner would likely be a distant dad, so you would be parenting more in that scenario. So I think that's not a guarantee of the grass is green with children.

I agree people who try to fix relationships that are in a bad place already by having kids might as well be trying to put out a fire by pouring petrol on it.

I'm sorry to hear about the difficulties you're facing in your marriage. It sounds like you're feeling lonely, unheard, and unfulfilled in your relationship. It can be incredibly challenging when there is a lack of communication, intimacy, and emotional connection.

Autism can impact individuals' social interactions and communication skills, which can sometimes create additional challenges in relationships. However, it's important to note that not all individuals with autism experience the same difficulties or exhibit the same behaviors. Each person is unique, and it's essential to approach these issues with empathy and understanding.

Seeking support from a therapist or counselor who specializes in relationships and autism could be beneficial for both you and your husband. They can provide guidance and help facilitate better communication between you two, as well as assist in navigating the challenges specific to your situation.

It's also important to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. Consider exploring your own interests, hobbies, and friendships outside of the marriage. Taking care of yourself emotionally and mentally is crucial, and it can help you navigate the challenges you're facing.

Remember that you're not alone in your experiences. Connecting with support groups or online communities for individuals in similar situations can provide a space to share your thoughts, find support, and learn from others who have faced similar challenges.

Ultimately, the decision to stay in the marriage or explore other options is a deeply personal one. A professional counselor can help you evaluate your options and make decisions that are right for you and your well-being.

Moreover, if you decide to get back to find love, you can try the dating apps to find your match. With AI technology you can craft your dating profile to find the perfect match.

Good Luck!

Do you have friends? How often do you see them? It's likely that he feels smothered by the high level of contact that must occur living with another person. If you can spread your social needs between a group of people you might be able to avoid overwhelming him.

Communication is key, not only from him but between you both, so make sure you regularly share. Tell him how you feel

I would also say that children would only amplify this problem. A distant partner would likely be a distant dad, so you would be parenting more in that scenario. So I think that's not a guarantee of the grass is green with children.

Is there a way to bridge the gap? It isn't the same, but many of us on the spectrum love animals, could caring for a dog or cat being you some sense of parental responsibility and also bring him out of his internal world a little? A bonding exercise?

Sending you my best Keep talking, he will be listening even if it doesn't always come across that way

I was kind of on the other side of similar relationships. Without realising it, I was pulling my wife down, and I felt she was pulling me down. We decided to divorce. It was painful, yes. But in the end it was very helpful for both of us.

Not being in relationships is better than being in toxic unhappy relationships. Breaking it is hard, but worth it. Of course you need to try to repair it first, but sounds like you did and met no interest from the other side. 

Also there's so much about wanting/not wanting children. Do not try to force or trick your husband into it. If it's so important for you - you might consider different options or a different partner again. 

Also I guess you underderstand, that following advice of strangers from the Internet directly and blindly is never a good idea. It's just and advice/possibility, you know your situation better.

I am so sorry, that sounds dreadful. This is making you so unhappy and your husband needs to recognise that and try to work on improving the state of your marriage. Life is too short to spend so unhappy in your marriage. If I was in your position I would insist that your husband sit down with you for a long talk to sort out how you can improve things. If he won’t try to work on making your relationship more healthy and happy then I think you need to consider ending the relationship, but hopefully when he fully takes on board what this is doing to you he will make the effort to work with you to make things happier. Good luck.