Return to work anxiety

I find that meditating helps, maybe 5 to 10 minutes daily if you can manage it and are able to allow yourself to have a bit of time before going into work. I would also inform them if you haven’t already of your diagnosis and ask that they take this into account. They should be able to cater to your needs. It is important to put yourself first as far as work goes because you’re no good to anyone if you’re burnt out. I wish you very very good luck and remember being autistic is something to be proud of, you’re strong. If you’re struggling to cope I would suggest ringing the Samaritans on the following number. 116123. Or Maybe get in touch with your GP and ask them for some advice with regarding the anxiety.

maybe get in touch with your GP and ask them for some advice with regarding the anxiety.

Hi, It is very reasonable to feel that way!! I can relate as well as I am autistic and I have been off work twice now due to burnout. First of all, 2.5 weeks is not a long time to recover from burnout at all! It sounds like you feel like it might be too soon to go back? Could you maybe get some more time off? When I first was off work due to burnout, I initially had a sick note that went for 2 weeks and when I got that I thought 'oh 2 weeks is so long ...' and I felt really bad about it , but by the end of it I was almost more exhausted than before and the thought of going back to work filled me with so much panic. Luckily my GP was very understanding and encouraged further time off- in the end I was off for 7 weeks and I still didn't feel recovered - sadly I had to go back for financial reasons (I had actually been exploited and had not been paid for the first 6 months and I desperately needed the income)- I still didn't feel ready and was terrified of going back but there was less panick than initially after the 2 weeks. 

It takes a lot of time to recover from burnout and maybe some more time off could help? 

Also I would suggest asking your GP about the possibility of a phased return once you are ready to go back. My GP suggested that when I was off recently due to burnout and it sounded like a very good idea. Though luckily this time I was able to just quit my job and didn't need to go back :) 

Is your workplace aware that you are autistic? Have they made reasonable adjustments? Is there anything that could be changed at work to make it less likely to burn you out (eg. maybe being given a seat in a quieter area of office or being able to work from home more etc?)? 

I think it is very understandable to be anxious about going back. I was very anxious when I went back- I worried I wouldn't cope. I worried about having to possibly answer people's questions etc etc. I am good at worrying anyways. People were much nicer than I had expected and it was a bit of a shock to go back but it went better than I thought. I was lucky though at the time that I was able to work quite flexible hours as I was technically only paid 50% even though I had been previously working 60 hour weeks... and on top of that I had not been paid for 6 months so that helped me feel less bad about not being there for the whole day initially-  but I think with a phased return you would also be able to ease yourself back into work again. 

I really hope you can get some more time off. I would be surprised if your GP didn't support this. And be kind to yourself. Your reaction is very very understandable!! Recovering from burnout takes time. 

Hi Smegs94, I'm a 39 Yr old male and was only diagnosed in January. I will be returning in 2 weeks after being off for five and a half months. I too feel the same way as you. My employer have finally agreed to offer the adjustments I requested after having to go down the grievance route under discrimination. It has been a nightmare to be honest. Me and my family and have agreed that I will give it one last try as I can't keep having breakdowns and burnouts, as it puts too much pressure on the whole family. The only advice I can offer you, which is what I will be trying is to just take it one day at a time. Have you thought about asking for adjustments? Like maybe having your desk in a quiter part of the office space? Or is there any facility to work from home on occassion to give you a break from any sensory overwhelme if that's what you struggle with. I too used to work at a call centre for a well known mobile network. I lasted 9 months I couldn't hack it. My wife is right when she says it's not the right career for me but as you all know most neuro diverse people hate change, so with employment you can feel like your stuck between a rock and a hard place. I do think it is true though that you get some great supportive employers in relation to supporting people with disabilities and some horrendous ones. There is also still a huge lack of insight among employers on how to support neuro diverse employees. 

Try not to be too hard on yourself and just be as open and honest as possible, sometimes just by doing that can help you to feel a little more at ease. Best of luck and it would be great if you coulcome back and let us know how you are getting on. Take care  

If you need more time off, ask your GP, and it really shouldn’t be a problem. I think if you’re off for 4 weeks it’s classed as long term sickness….in some places anyway. In which case, you’ll need to chat with your employers. You may be able to come back to work gradually.  I think if they know, they need to do something to make things easier for you. 

It’s normal for a lot of NT people to feel nervous going to back to work after a long time off, but for someone who is Autistic, it’s more like dread. I know, because I feel it every week I restart my shifts, and it’s worse when I’ve had holiday for just a week! Not to take away from your troubles at all, but if I say I spent most of yesterday in tears, then went into work that evening, thinking I was going to cry (but didn’t). I had imaged everything would be awful, and people would see me cry, and then I’d tell them about me being autistic etc etc..When in reality it was pretty much a non event. 
Only you know what can and can’t manage right now, so take care of you, and don’t worry about what other think, or if you feel like your letting yourself down. You aren’t. Rest and self care is number one.

Smegs94 said:

I usually have a very strong work ethic, but for some reason I am absolutely dreading having to go back

I feel your pain - I had a similar earlier career where I was in 1st and 2nd line IT support where I would spend a lot of time on the phone for a few weeks then out visiting customers to resolve their issues for a few weeks (in the banking sector which has famously short tempered users).

Only once I had a bad burnout and I took a week off (being a contractor I wasn't paid if I didn't work) but I decided there and then to quit and find a lower stress job closer to home.

Luckily my experience allowed me to get a role in a security team in a bank in my home town (rather than the American bank in London) and I had 3 months of processing security requests in a lovely, close knit team. That gave me a 35 hour working week, a 10 minute commute and a chance to catch up with old friends so by the end I felt human again.

Then I got a call from my old boss in the American bank, asking me to come back for a 60% pay increase so I ended up going back into the lions den, but took a lot more care to manage stressful situations and not over-commit to work stuff. It worked out well and I even ended up being sent out to work in Latin America for a year where I ended up meeting the love of my life.

The takeaway I would suggest from my experiences is to:

1. Take as much control of the situation as you can. Speak to your doctor about what documentation they can give to confirm your status as an Autustic person and a note to explain that you may need some consideration to remain healthy (Autism is classified as a disability I believe).

2. Speak to the Human Resources dept (or the People dept, depending on how woke the company is) and tell them your status and suggest what reasonable accomodations would help you work effectively. I don't know if they are obliged to make these changes but it is the best way if you want to carry on working there.

3. Find support in coping with the return stress. We are here to help as much as we can but a friend or family member is more likely to be there when you need them.

4. Now the important bit. Look for a way to change your job. I think a pressurised role like the one you are in with lots of human contact is probably very unhealthy for you, so look at other roles you can do that get you away from the pressure of answering the phone constantly, speaking to often unhappy people and having little time to resolve problems that are often outside your control.

Look at other areas that interest you. Maybe start studying IT administration (eg office 365 account admin, user account admin etc) which will give you a lot less face to face (or ear to ear...) contact with the users.

Longer term think of if IT is actually your thing and actively learn the skills to move into a team that meets your needs more - maybe infrastructure admin, IT security, project management etc. This is a longer process but it pays better, has less of the stressers that your current role brings and has more scope to specialise.

I've helped a lot of colleagues using mentoring or coaching over the years to get into roles that they feel more suited to and it is really worth the effort.

I've even applied this to myself and now have left IT to work in restoring old properies to their former glory, both in the UK and in Brazil (a long story), but I'm now loving the new career and making a very healthy living off it too.

Sorry for the overly long ramble - the upshot of it is to take control back even if it looks like you have little. You will be surprised at what you can achieve.

Good luck with the return.

Impossible demands on us, in the workforce. 

Plus, all those who love to shout; over the phone. 

I agree with this answer get more time off and in your time off make other plans or look for another quite job. Or go and get some help from an autistic professional who can access you and contact your doctor as you might need to leave that job or require months off. 

This happened to me a lot. I can't work anymore. 

I used to go to the loos to cry. 

you might need to speak to your doctor or an autistic professional. 

another option is to go to college or uni and do something you are interested in and try to get a better type of working environment that is quit, like a small office in a university. 

I would make plans for other employment or education. 

Burnout in call centres happens to NT's a lot too. It is a harsh environment. 

What you are feeling is a perfectly ok and normal part of autistic burnout. None of this is your fault, workplaces arent designed for people like us

I had my own autistic burnout in January last year, I have twice tried to go back to work since and both times I have ended up with a worse burnout. I am currently getting signed off sick again

The demand to mask at work can be completely overwhelming and if your working in a busy call centre full of noise then the sensory overload must be huge as well

2 and a half weeks does seem like an awfully short time to recover from an autistic burnout. If you push yourself to go back in before your ready you could end up with a much worse burnout in the long run. I dont know what to advise as obvioulsy it depends on your financial situation and how long your job is willing to pay you while your not in but could you maybe get a longer sick note from the doctor? Im guessing you mean you have a Fit note where the doctor signs it and says your not fit to work until a certain date, usually they are willing to do this for a few months at a time if you need it?

Ive been through what your going through now so Im always here if you want a friend to talk to, your not alone