Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello! I'm new here, so a bit nervous to post. I'm 29 years old in Feb and got my official diagnosis of autism after a long wait in October of 2022.
Unfortunately I had to take some time from work due to autistic + type 1 diabetes burnout, as I work in a busy call centre and the constant customer service + office environment masking made me very unwell. I have had approximately 2 and a half weeks off now, and my sick note runs out today, so I am back in tomorrow. Although the time off to regulate myself and be authentic to my actual needs has been nice and much needed, I am now left with a constant overwhelming anxiety about having to go back to work.
I usually have a very strong work ethic, but for some reason I am absolutely dreading having to go back in to where the demand is high for masking again, to the point I can feel myself getting overwhelmed before I've even gone back in. I don't really know what to do or who to confide in as I keep getting told that it's normal to feel nervous about going back after time off. I'm scared that I'll push myself to go in and then breakdown and start uncontrollably crying again like I did before I took some sick leave. I know that there's nothing that can be done for me and all actions are my own, but perhaps I'm hoping for some advice or suggestions, or maybe even just a safe space to vent. I also acknowledge that not everyone is able to work so I'm sorry if this is a sensitive topic for anyone personally. Thank you.
What you are feeling is a perfectly ok and normal part of autistic burnout. None of this is your fault, workplaces arent designed for people like us
I had my own autistic burnout in January last year, I have twice tried to go back to work since and both times I have ended up with a worse burnout. I am currently getting signed off sick again
The demand to mask at work can be completely overwhelming and if your working in a busy call centre full of noise then the sensory overload must be huge as well
2 and a half weeks does seem like an awfully short time to recover from an autistic burnout. If you push yourself to go back in before your ready you could end up with a much worse burnout in the long run. I dont know what to advise as obvioulsy it depends on your financial situation and how long your job is willing to pay you while your not in but could you maybe get a longer sick note from the doctor? Im guessing you mean you have a Fit note where the doctor signs it and says your not fit to work until a certain date, usually they are willing to do this for a few months at a time if you need it?
Ive been through what your going through now so Im always here if you want a friend to talk to, your not alone
I agree with this answer get more time off and in your time off make other plans or look for another quite job. Or go and get some help from an autistic professional who can access you and contact your doctor as you might need to leave that job or require months off.