Late Diagnosis

Don't worry, you're a learner, you're not expected to be an expert, and you're not being tested on grammar or sentence structure.

I don't have early years training or experience (I worked with children aged 7-10 when I was an SEN teaching assistant) However I have just googled play theorists and found it quite interesting.

What guidelines have you been given for the research? Were you just told to research play theorists and write about what you discovered? If so this is how I would approach it:

First, read about all the play theorists you find and make some brief notes about the main ideas each of them came up with.

Then, choose which ones you want to write about. If you've been told to only write about one, then just choose one but I hope that's not the case as it's more useful to compare and contrast different ones. You can't choose the "wrong" person, it doesn't matter which one you choose as long as you report their work and ideas correctly. As your course includes an SEN element, I would include at least one whose theories you think might benefit SEN children.

If you've been told to write about just one play theorist, write about the benefits and drawbacks you think there would be by implementing their ideas. If you haven't been told to only write about one, compare and contrast the ideas of the ones you choose. You can also present what you see as the benefits and possible drawbacks or limitations of each theorist in a table format as part of the report.

When writing text, instead of using an AI try thinking about what you would tell someone if they asked what you were writing about, then it might sound a bit more natural. I haven't used ChatGPT so I don't know exactly what it does, but I don't think it would be cheating to use it if it's only rewriting your own words - but try to have more confidence in yourself.

You could do a rough draft and then ask your tutor to have a look at it to see if you have understood what they wanted you to do, and ask for feedback about how you could improve it. If you have a mentor in your workplace, you could ask for their feedback instead as they will have done something similar when training.

I hope this is helpful. If not, just try to pluck up the courage to tell your tutor that you are unsure if you are doing it correctly and ask if they could please give you.some guidance. That's their job. Think of it not as confrontation but as asking for help, which we all need sometimes. 

Hi and welcome to the community! I’m female in my middle thirties, not diagnosed. When I was a kid some teachers suggested to my mom I might be autistic (I realized it was because of my selective mutism I had at school) but my mom just laughed it off and ignored. I felt very much like you at your age with the difference that I had no idea i might be autistic and I was super harsh on myself. When I asked my mom if I’m autistic she got angry and denied that. Now I feel like I wish I knew sooner. I’m still on my way I can say. I wish you find support and connections here. 

as for issues writing down your thoughts - we all are different, having various spikey skill sets, so I would say it might be just you, but the fact that autism is correlated with spikey skill sets it may increase the difference between what we are good in and what we struggle with. I always struggled to use formulas. Not to understand them, but to remember the symbols and their meaning in physics and math. 

DinoMitePink  There's many here who are yet to be diagnosed, or haven't been diagnosed with all they could/should be yet.  Many who are still on a journey of self-discovery.

What tends to happen is you may hear more from those who are possibly comfortable at the stage they are at, or those who have current issues.  

There's no hard and fast rule re emotions and autism.  I've known some that have very few (visible) emotions, whereas I tend to be all over the place, and cannot really explain why logically.  Emotional dysregulation is a thing, of course, and being overwhelmed and isolated adds to that.  

Thank you for the reply, you won’t offend anyone, it’s a good quality to care about others. There’s a lot more people struggling here also, ironically the spectrum isn’t black and white. You’ve come to the right place, I’ve been here a few days and I’ve only had good experiences so far!

I really didnt want to offend anyone by posting this because I feel like all the posts I have read on here are people who have come to terms with their diagnosis and are at peace with it (like I mentioned I am new to this and Im sure there are people out there like this just not anyone I have found). I know exactly what you mean about becoming over aware of your behaviours but I am the opposite as I am very overly emotional and I have a strong lack of control over how I am with people. Since being diagnosed I feel more aware of this and knowing the reason hasnt helped in a way I thought it would. 

I am doing an Early Years apprentice with a supporting children with SEN additional award, currently working on play theorists and its not like the work is difficult to me I just doubt myself a lot. I have found a couple of theorists but because I havent been told who to research Im worried that im not doing it correctly or I have chosen the wrong person to research. I know practically it is all probably fine but the main thing I am struggling with is writing the information down that I find. I use ChatGPT a lot to help me structure my responses but then feel really ashamed in myself like im cheating and getting AI to do my work. 

I understand, I also felt too intimidated to challenge things or ask questions when I was younger.

Although I'm now retired, I have qualifications in learning support and English Language teaching, did a work based accounting qualification and have mentored colleagues doing them. So if you feel happy to share more about what course you are doing and what the concept is that you can't grasp, I might be able to give you some pointers. Your course has probably been structured for you to find out the answers yourself because we can often retain knowledge we search for better than that which is just handed to us, but some students need more support and structure. Your tutor should be asking you how you are getting on and prompting you to say if you find anything difficult - I would do that with any student, but as you are autistic it's even more important. 

Hey there, kinda relate to what you feel about it being a hard pill to swallow, I’m not diagnosed myself but teaching myself about autism and reading a lot of other people’s experiences I’m pretty sure I am, that and it’s ticking all the right boxes in a eye popping fashion. But it’s genuinely not something I accepted into my world before a few weeks ago? Recent pressures in my life, my mother dying was one thing and me finding her is as you can imagine, fairly traumatic. My Nan also passed away a few weeks ago. All I can describe the feeling is as if I’m emotionally and spiritually dropping to my knees in defeat. I thought I was the one in control of my own emotions? And my sense of self is like a roller coaster at the moment, personally i have become almost too aware of how I behave now towards others which is without emotion a lot of the time. 

Thank you! I have never heard of right-to-choose so I will look into this but I really appreciate the time you took to comment thank you!

Thank you I really apricate you sharing this!

In that case, I'd be doing that ADHD test online, and depending on the result, going along to my GP to see if I could hurry the process up by using right-to-choose (if I lived in England where the service operates).

I have inherent issues with right-to-choose but I have to point out what is available for others regardless of my own opinion.   

Getting a dual diagnosis might give you greater validation and help you come to terms with how you feel, and how you are currently processing matters.  There's also a world of difference between ADHD and ADHD+ASD in terms of how you cope now, and how you may be going forward - and potentially what options are available in terms of treatment and support too.  

I wish you all the best.  As someone who is prevaricating over ADHD myself, that is. 

DinoMitePink said:

I thought I had ADHD to the point I got referred by my GP to be diagnosed

There is a good article explaining the Autism ADHD shared symptoms that may help you identify if what you experience goes beyond autisms scope:

https://neurodivergentinsights.com/misdiagnosis-monday/adhd-vs-autism/

Thank you for your reply, I really apricate the positive spin of autism as I am really struggling to see any at the minute. 

I really struggle with confrontation so I always feel too intimidated to change the way something is presented to me. I have got a tutor but she simply provides me with questions to answer and I have to sort of find the information out myself. I know I can go to her if I get stuck but my problem lies with the whole concept rather than the questions themselves and I don't know how I bring this up without it feeling like a confrontation.  

Hi and welcome. I'm a woman in my sixties and for most of my life if someone had suggested I might be autistic I'd have thought they were a bit crazy. Then when I was in my fifties I watched a documentary featuring an autistic woman and realised I was a lot like her. To be honest, before that I didn't really know what autism was.

I have also sometimes wished I was more like other people, but we can't change who we are. Although we struggle with some things, we also have positive attributes, which can include problem solving skills, retention of facts, creativity, attention to detail, hyper focus, honesty and loyalty. This means that we can fill the skills gaps in teams where the others are not autistic, for example they might see the big picture but we can see the details.

I'm surprised that you are expected to be self taught while doing an apprenticeship - you should have a mentor and they should be able to guide you if you are stuck. Don't be afraid to ask for help, and tell them how you learn best - whether it's that you need more clear unambiguous instructions, or more structured questions, or information in the form of pictures or diagrams. Your employer/trainers have a responsibility to make reasonable adjustments for you.

Thank you for your reply, interestingly enough growing up I thought I had ADHD to the point I got referred by my GP to be diagnosed and I have been on the waiting list for 3 years now, it just so happens I was diagnosed with autism first. I feel like that threw me off guard as I always just assumed it was ADHD and that was deemed a "safe" diagnosis so when I was told it was something else (instead or as well as) it caused me to spiral. 

It could be autism, it could be ADHD, it could be a mixture, it could be the knowledge you've been diagnosed playing havoc with your brain & making you feel you can't do things when you can.  I'd not like to speculate.

I can relate.  If I were you I'd be doing an online ADHD test, purely out of curiosity.  https://www.clinical-partners.co.uk/for-adults/adult-adhd-add/test-for-adhd

Learning toward school examinations is a totally different type of learning than the type you are currently faced with, as you've noticed.  However plenty of neuro-typical individuals struggle with conventional learning or what you now face - or both.  It is a fact that some find it easier to absorb material that is placed in front of them rather than to learn on-the-job as it were. 

It does sound that you need some support, and it is good that you've found this forum.  Others will tell of their experiences, and that will make you feel less isolated.  I'd be heading to my GP to see if they can potentially refer you to some local support - either through the NHS or otherwise - for those with ASD.  You may wish to pursue the ADHD line should it be something that chimes with you also.  

It is difficult when 95% of the population aren't neuro-diverse.  Perhaps you could also find out if there are any ASD groups in your local area, or potentially join groups for any special interests you may have too. 

Incidentally.  My first experience of going blank and not being able to absorb was when I was revising for GCSEs.  The pressure got to a point that I literally couldn't take anything in anymore, and that, coupled with a parent who got frustrated and angry that I wasn't doing my best - as he saw it - just trebled the problem.  I guess my brain shutdown.   Whatever the cause, you need some help finding a solution.