what kind of autism research would you do?

No - if it were contempt directed at men it would be misandry as gyny = female e.g. gynaecologist, andry = male hence 'androgyny' meaning having 'male and female' characteristics.

If it is direct at people in general it's misanthropy (anthro = 'human' such in anthropology i.e. study of humans)

And I deeply respect that. Thanks Lonewarrior. I give up trying to help BlueRay anyway. She’s not my problem. She is a problem for NAS and has some very good ideas and views. But if I like someone, I don’t want them destroying themselves. So take care of yourself BlueRay, whoever you were/are. Independence is walking away. I don’t need NAS. I will miss everyone. But then real life is for living, and sharing. Give and take. I’ve learned that here. Goodbye

And I said them honestly with full intention. I am just mirroring things back, woman to woman. If NAS harbours such people and protects them then I am out of here. I accept full responsibility and have no anger against anyone else. Frustration with one other, but everyone else is supportive of each other. It is my first controlled meltdown. But it’s good to be honest. If that doesn’t help her? nothing ever will. Sorry. NAS are fully aware. 

Lone warrior it is Russian rubbish. Im plain English Blue Ray has either never been a qualified social worker or she could be a former part timer called Mary. She is a right doppelgänger for this person anyway. So to me she has become mad mary and that could be a whole new thread. Or a matter for investigation by the appropriate outside professionals. It is not good, but my Russian is just rubbish and means just that. I have left NAS anyway. No problem. I mean no harm, just deflecting misleading boasts of the one. Sorry. Maybe I’m a real troll, but someone has to do the job. 

My impression is that they often have a one-size-fits-all approach, so that they struggle when presented with someone who clearly doesn't match their usual "customer profile".

I have the feeling that the support worker goes scurrying off to their supervisor after each meeting with me and they both scratch their heads and then carry on regardless, delivering their usual "product".  It's like a safe path from which they're very relucatnt to deviate unfortunately.    

RIP Van Winkle said, 

“However, the behaviour I inadvertently seem to have mirrored in psychiatric settings, perhaps to ‘fit in’ I defininitely learned there! Perhaps that’s for another thread one day. ”

Perhaps indeed.?

 Interesting you say you not only mirrored but also “learned” there.

I too have learnt a great deal over my many years of existing in this planet.

 Most I see I do not wish to follow or indeed mirror to fit in. I cannot and never will betray myself by changing to suit others that seek only to cause pain and suffering to myself and others.

 I keep taking the hurt as I refuse to accept that all other beings are set out to cause harm.

There are loving caring and understanding people everywhere, I know some and they accept me for who I am and I accept them.

 I do not always fully understand any given exchange but accept each and every being in this earth is unique and has free thought.

 I believe certain things can be learnt that are not innate in me, but I can see that speaking words to cause suffering deliberately are not kind.

 I choose not to mirror that.

I have a couple of health conditions that render me uninsurable.  Way too risky.  I have to take all the risk on myself if I'm travelling.

Yes, i've encountered this unfairness with respect to another genetic condition.  Rather than pay over three times the usual premium I've decided to simply put an equivalent amount into savings each month, in the hope that this will help to guard against unforseen eventualities.  Not perfect, i know, but more affordable and makes me feel I'm doing what I can to deal with risks.   

Thanks Qwerty.  Just had a look and at the moment they seem to be only seeking information from carers for autistic adults - a position I'm in but we lack a formal diagnosis due to total non engagement with services.  I'll revisit this site in future though.   

It's a great way to sit & do nothing while being on the case waiting for someone else - any difficult questions can be blamed on the delay by the other team.

I also get the feeling that he's out of his depth - they seem to like low-functioning 'customers' because they are easy to push around and get medicated into oblivion.   People like me are too much hassle - they'd have to work for their money.

My needs are complex - I appear to be functioning very well because people only talk about my medical problems - and I can clearly expain all the issues because I've had the exact same conversation a thousand times - and that's all they are interested in.

If you talk to me about other subjects, my difficulties are really obvious - but they never do that - even if I tell them  - they go straight back to the medical stuff.

.

Ah, as you will have gleaned from my other posts i'm finding it something of a mixed blessing.  I'd rather have a support worker than not but I'm so far not convinced they're geared up to offer very much.  

You have to wait until you've been seen by the memory team before you get more sessions with the support worker?  I keep running into stuff like this and it does feel very much like being fobbed off.  Why can't they work concurrently?     

You're lucky to have a support worker - I ended up reaching crisis point and eventually I was assessed and was assigned a support worker - who basically hasn't bothered.  

My brain injury means he's decided to fob me off onto the memory team that deals with dementia patients - so I probably won't see him a gain for a couple of years when the other team finally get their act together.

It realy does look as though they don't know what to do so they just hide from their responsibilities.

I have mixed feeling about this.  I've only been diagnosed for a few months but it seems that many in may family don't want to hear about it and certainly don't want to be assessed themselves.  

And yes, people do have the right to make their own choices but even here I can see a downside.  My own take would be that that's their choice but that sometimes the effects of this on both themselves and other family members are far from fine.  My experience has been that when individuals are running into severe difficulties linked to undiagnosed autism and choose to carry on regardless, the impact of this choice radiates out and impinges on the rest of the household.  Good practice, the law and indeed our better nature force us to respect an adult's autonomy, but sometimes this becomes ridiculously difficult.

It's a minefield, yes, but insurers ask about family history anyway so however a person was diagnosed it'd be on the record.  

From my own experience external support is scant but, if I'd known earlier you can bet I'd have been in this forum a lot sooner plus started reading up and taking account of possible needs and issues at a much earlier stage.  I think I'd have been much better equipped both as an individual and as a parent.  

I think I'd still have taken the test.  

Yesterday, at my 1:1 "support" my support worker was once again providing anecdotes and examples from his own family, basically telling me about all the support and adaptations he'd been able to get for his children because their autism was identified early.  "Great!" I thought, "But what about situations that have gone horribly wrong due to not knowing and not getting that early help?"  :(

I have no clue as to why you added words that are in Serbian letter form?

The literal translation does not give a true meaning as to the context you wish to put forward I think?

may I ask why you chose to reply in such a manner?

The literal translation comes out as “ Duck Work on All”.

As I do not speak or understand Serbian I do not understand your reasons for adding it other than to maybe hide your words in some way?

Your second reply “ Mad Mary by any chance?” are also left open to interpretation.

You are entitled to read and reply as you see fit to, I do not however see your many replies to mainly one being as in any way constructive or indeed to debate the subject matter in this post.

I am off myself to find out the meaning of various words, like “ sniping” “ cajoling “  and “with intent” “ deliberately “.

I like to find the correct meaning of such words in order to make sure the true meaning is known.

i naghi amasi m

And of coarse you are so kind and caring and full of compassion.

Your honesty here clearly shows your ability to hate and give hurt to anyone who doesn’t fit your own personal thoughts or beliefs. 

The words you have used here are purely to cause hurt and distress to another being. Regardless of how you perceive that being it is never right to set out deliberately to hurt them or cause them pain.

 You have shown your true intentions by using words deliberately and intended to cause suffering.

 I only seek to point out how you are worse than a being who openly stated they do not understand your words or thoughts. Clearly stated they do not always understand things in a way others do. 

You clearly understand everything, your by definition perfect so long as everything fits in with your idealistic view point.

I find your reply offensive, destructive and given to cause a great deal of pain to a being who openly admits to not fully understanding this world.

I wish you well and Hope you look back at the things you have said which were deliberate and you fully understood the pain they would cause.

Mad MARY by any chance? 

???!!!! Government health warning. Плучек рад о алл 

I was a social worker qwerty, (still am but not currently working) and I’ll always remember her, probably as she was so different to most of the trainers and I did one particular five day course with her (as well as others), but this one has stayed in my mind as it was so different to any other kind of social work course I had done, in the U.K. anyway. It was in line with how I work already, which was unusual (as I don’t work like most of the others, now I know why lol) and it was all about having conversations with people to get to the root cause of the problems and to get creative in finding solutions and to make the most of the support systems they already had.

Now I think about it, it was when the new care act came in so it was in support of that. Sadly, it kind of fell on deaf ears with most people, because like most of our institutes, it’s like it’s fixed to work a certain way and people feel unable to change that, for some reason, even though they have the laws to back them up and they weren’t trained that way. 

Celia works in line with how I work but it was difficult to get even the managers to change. In the end I went straight to the director, with my proposals and he really liked them and was getting on board with them and the next thing I heard he had been side stepped, or how ever they say it, they had taken him off that job and put him somewhere else. It was as if they didn’t want to change how they worked. I couldn’t understand it. 

I loved that job and I’m still highly sought after, but towards the end of my career, I felt backed into a corner. I think I could still do a good job and make a difference but I would have to give up my independent status and work directly for the authority, which is way less money, not a huge deal I know, but it compensated for the number of breaks I needed to take, as I don’t really fit into a traditional type set up, even with flexible working hours, working from home etc. So I haven’t been able to let go of that career altogether just yet and I’m getting heavily into voluntary community work so I’ll still work with people that way and I’m currently on a coarse that will enable me to set up and work for myself, still in the ‘help’ type profession, but I somehow want to link it back to working with the clients I used to work with in social work and mental health work, as I loved the clients, I loved the job really and the people I worked with, I love the systems etc, of course they could be better, but couldn’t we all we’re all works in progress but my vision has always been to some how link my work back up with the system. Who knows, maybe like Dr Harbottle I’ll become a trainer of soughts, who knows, we’ll see, I need to complete this course first and get myself out of this burnout :) 

Cool! I watched some of the video, and she seems to understand autism very well. Some of the things she says are really insightful, and I can relate a lot.

BlueRay, what kind of job were you doing before to be able to work with her?