Published on 12, July, 2020
What are your experiences with dating and do you find it difficult to maintain a relationship? I find communication hard sometimes and can come across cold.
That was a very thoughtful thing to do. And you got two cards too! Any clues at all so you can do some detective work? Are they handwritten? Good luck anyway.
All I can say is that's sad, I hope you find a way to feel happy.
I’m not into dating, it’s not my ‘thing’ and it never has been. I enjoy my own company although I do enjoy other people’s company, in small measures, if they discuss what I want to discuss. I don’t find it difficult to maintain relationships, I have friends that I had as a child, but I do only see them or have contact with them every few years or so, so I guess that helps with maintaining them; I doubt I would maintain a friendship for very long with a person who wanted regular and frequent contact with me as I don’t enjoy frequent (in person) contact with anybody. I find communicating very easy and enjoyable, if the person or people I am communicating with are on my wavelength and even more so if they share my interests. I come across as cold to people who don’t understand me but then again, the majority of the poplulation come across as cold to me, so it works both ways. I find many people to be quite aggressive, even if it’s passive aggression and I find many people to be so attached to their ‘beliefs’ and their ideas of what is ‘right’ and ‘wrong’ etc, that they are aggressive and violent even when speaking softly and politely, so most people just don’t do it for me, I find them highly uninteresting and I get bored i their company and fortunately for me, I enjoy my own company so it’s not a problem.
UNREASONABLE behaviour - i.e. being ASD
Sorry to hear that Mute. Was it totally out of the blue or have things been rocky for a while?
Note quite.... NEWS FLASH! - just been told from my OH that he wants a divorce!
Off the back of this I was thinking did anyone have any interesting Valentine's?
I sent one but not in a romantic sense, one was a big bunch of flowers to my brother-in-laws sister who split up with her now ex at new year and the last few times I've seen her she was really down so it was to cheer her up. I sent them anonomously and it had the desired effect, she was so happy, posted in on Facebook saying how lucky she was, my brother-in-law was talking about it with my sister and he said it's pretty much the first time she's smiled since she was dumped. No one connected will ever know I sent them to her which makes me even happier, I don't like being the centre of attention.
I received two cards and I have no idea who either of them was from. One came in the normal post and the other was in the internal mail at the location where my work is, which is a secure site but has around 1,200 people on site daily and can peak at over 6,000 so that doesn't really narrow it down that much.
So in the end none of that gets me any further along in finding Miss Right, back to Tinder in a few weeks to see if I can get some successful dates!
Hopefully one of more of you had some success?
I thought it was something I was supposed to do because others did.
I did not enjoy the experience. I did not like.
Is that related to Asexuality?
That's a good point. There are many ways to approach being in a relationship, so if you can find someone who shares the same aims it could potentially work. There are definitely more people now that are content not to live together (if they can afford it).
If dates make you that nervous, it was brave of you to try.
That sounds familiar. I never could understand why people would go to effort like that just to upset other people!
I think silence is taken to be creepy. Especially with guys.
Hmmm... to me it is a complete opposite.
I love silence. I can focus the best in silence.
If I had a partner, I would like to sit together in silence and enjoy it together.
That’s true. I think silence is taken to be creepy. Especially with guys.
TheTalentedMute said:And there is nothing wrong with silence! - aspies crave it...NTs seem frightened of it! :)
I have noticed the same thing!
And there is nothing wrong with silence! - aspies crave it...NTs seem frightened of it! :)
The aspie didn’t know how to reply.
Lol...when you hit middle age (like me)....im hitting the Sapio road!! The looks might have faded by the self is still firing on all cylinders! (for the moment, anyhow!) - hehe
it have you time, read the link below. Its about a woman called "Ellie" who talks about the potential benefits of aspie - to - aspie relationships. But all relationships are different
https://seeingdoubleautismawareness.wordpress.com/2016/08/19/autism-and-romantic-relationships-aspies-dating-aspies/
Nice.