Adult Diagnosis - Embarressed

 What does this have to do with whether one should seek a diagnosis of Au ism or accept the diagnoses of Autism?

Firstly I did not seek a diagnoses of Autism.

I was given one in 1966 and 1976 probably good enough to be official but confirmed by Doctor Howlin.  Those diagnoses were given to me without being asked for.

Has that happened to anyone else?

If it had been explained to my Mother why the Maudsley thought I was Autistic and we accepted it.  It is true that I still need not have gone to the Autistic School.

The Local Primiary would have accepted me as they knew all about my contact with the Maudsley and I  even went to an afternoon a week to a special needs school.

I went to the Special Needs School without any students to prevent fights with other children.

It is true the first Secondary School would not have accepted me.

1968 till 1970

It was a Private Grammar School.

That would have been a jolly good job as I was very unhappy there.

Who cares it has closed down.

The Second Private School.

There from 1970 till 1973

The Head Master at interview saw I had problems.

I did an Aspi thing by taking the Coffee which was meant for my Mother.

Had Coffee with the Head Master.

In other words that school might have had me if they had known I was Autistic.

That school has also closed down.

I could have gone to any State Secondary School but the classes were large and I would have got bullied.

David

I came back from a few days away to a letter from IMHS. So I thought bingo, assesment date inside. I was quite dissapointed to read that the access clinictian/CPN wants to see me again since it was a while since she seen me.

"I am aware it has been a number of weeks since we last met therefore I would like to meet you on;.............."

Part of me thinks, why not just chase my appointment, rather than call me in to tell me they intend to chase it up. Worlds gone mad. The person I will see is a nice person, and is quite on the ball and pro-active. However I feel I'm wasting both mine and their time. Thankfully I'm off work on the given day.

What does this have to do with whether one should seek diagnosis or not?

Sorry I am not clear it was not about formal diagnoses it was about ny Mother not acceptinng that I was Autistic.

A Psychiatrist recommended an Autistic school for me in 1966 when I was aged nine.

He did not explain to my Mother why he recommended the school or why he thought I was Autistic.  He just told my Mother that the more able children help the less able children.  My Mother wanted me to go to school to be educated not to help Autistc children.

I was at thact Local Primiary when I was five and we did not know it was going to workout the second time round.  We were at our wits end not knowing what school to send me to.

I do not know which school I would have gone to if we had accepted that I was Autistic.  When I was miserable at secondary school I think we forgot about the recommedation for the Autistic School.  (The Secondary School was a Private Grammar School.)

May be I should have told the staff at my first secondary school that I should not be here at all and in an Autistic School

May be the school knew about the recommendation for a special school when they read my medical records.

As it was we found another Private school a bit better.

David

I don't see how you equate that to "sometimes a diagnosis can be harmful", David.

Had you had a formal diagnosis of Autism, would that have meant you would have automatically had to go to a special school?

Maybe back then.

But not now.

What's more likely now is that with a formal diagnosis you would have been able to force the headmaster to make adjustments for your autism.

What may or may not have happened to you 40 odd years ago is not a good basis on which to advise people whether they should or should not get a dignosis at the present time.

The point I was making is that if we had believed I was Autistic I might have gone to a special school for Autistic children.

I do not think that Autistic school would have been good for me.

They did not have schools for High Functioning Autistic people.

That School which has closed down in 1972 would all most certainly not have had me if they had known I was Autistic.

They should really have had me and treated me properly but that would not have happened.

The Head Master knew that it was not right to hit me and he even said it is impossible to treat me as a normal boy.

David

Dav

In many situations it is good to know your diagnoses and to accept it.

However when I was nine at the Maudsley the Psychiatrist recommended a Special School for Autisstic Children.  That is 1966 nearly fifty years ago.

My Mother did not believe I was Autistic and did not send me to an Autistic School.

I went back to the Local Primiary I had left when I was five years old.

I was quite happy there.

When I went on to Secondary School I was unhappy.

The Head Mistress recommended a Private Grammar School as I nearly passed the Eleven Plus.

At the first Secondary School I went to they did not only hit me for offenses like not paying attention in class.  Two of the Masters actually told me that my Parents should hit me more and told my Parents that as well.

They also complained about my Mother  helping me with my Homework.

On one occasion I was sent to the Head Master for getting help with my Geometry.

I got it all right at home but could not do it in class.

I said to the Head Master that the French Master gives no sermons about getting help with Homework. He was furious and said he would put me accross the table and cane me.

He wrote a letter to my Mother saying it is impossible to treat me as a  normal boy and I should be in a special school. This letter is in my Geometry Book which I still have

Shortly after that I left that school and went  to College.

At College I got six O Levels and 2 A Levels but no English so that made it more difficult to get jobs.

The question must be asked Would it really have been better if I had gone to a Special School? That might have happened if my Mother had accepted that I was Autistic.

I think at that Autistic School the children cannot even speak properly.

I do not think there was a school for High Functioning Autistic children..

Being in Denyal might have been a good thing.

David.

.

I have to agree with you Scorpion0x17 on ALL points:

Scorpion0x17 said:

You've answered your own question there David.

It makes a difference, with how people see, and treat, you, be that family, or social services, or doctors, or whoever.

That difference can be very important.

It can be the difference that stops someone killing themselves.

The first step to happiness is self-knowledge.

A formal diagnosis provides greater understanding for yourself and those around you (however you wish to disclose).

David said:

If you have a severe illness than a diagnoses can save your life.

Whether you have Autism or not is never a matter of Life and Death.

.......when you are feeling alone ,at odds with the world and so hopeless that you are considering suicide then I think that it is a 'matter of Life or Death'. A diagnosis does not 'cure' you but it can bring about an understanding that enables you to now make sense of things in a positive way.

I believed I might have a personality disorder before I was diagnosed with AS. I hated the thoughts in my head, I thought I was bad for disliking other people when they did not respond to my demands, or that I got angry with people, or that I was not that emotional when people were upset. I now realise I cannot help this - although I can modify my behaviour to an extent, I cannot help the fact I do not display empathy in the usual way, that I have no real friendships, that I prefer being on my own, that I have child-like temper outbursts when under stress.

So actually David, diagnosis is vital.

You've answered your own question there David.

It makes a difference, with how people see, and treat, you, be that family, or social services, or doctors, or whoever.

That difference can be very important.

It can be the difference that stops someone killing themselves.

The first step to happiness is self-knowledge.

I exageratted it to make a point.

What I am saying is:  Why is it so urgent to have a diagnoses?

If you have a severe illness than a diagnoses can save your life.

Whether you have Autism or not is never a matter of Life and Death.

As for the vallue of a diagnoses.

It might mean that you get more support and people understand you better.

As explained in my previous E Mail my Father really believed that  I turned out so badly as my Mother was not strict enough with me.

My Father believed children should have love and affection but plenty of firm handling.

When it was explained to him that I have Asperger Syndrome a kind of high functioning  Autistim he stopped blaming my Mother.

I was not even in the room when this discussion took place although I was aged thirty-three.  What I do not like is that the Psychologist thought it should be a secret that I have Asperger Syndrome and my Parents should not really know.

Things have changed since 1990 as the law now says that we are entitled to know what the Doctors think of us.

In 2009 I asked my GP to look up where the idea of Asperger Syndrome comes from and he told me that it comes from a Psychiatrist who visited us briefly in my home in 1976 and he said that I had mild Autism.

I am not sure if it would count as a diagnoses on its own but as Professor Pat.Howlin has said that I certainly have Asperger Syndrme I think that should be good enough.

I did not see Dr.Howlin until after we were told that I had Asperger Syndrome so she was not the first person to diagnose me.

David

Do we all know who Professor Pat Howlin is?

She is certainly an Autism expert.

David said:

What is to be gained from a diagnoses.

We are the same person what ever label we have?

David, are you saying that you see no value in a diagnosis?

We are the same person what ever label we have?

David

Why do you want to be diagnosed?

The occasions I was told I did not go to be diagnosed.

When I was nineteen I had a Consultant Psychiatrist coming on a home visit because we were worried that I could have something wrong with my Stomach and should be examined.  He thought it was Psychological.

He put on my notes that I have mild Autism that was 1976.

My GP told me in 2009 that it is the equivalent today of Asperger Syndrome.

My Father was a great believer in discipline for children and thought I turned out the way I did beause my Mother was too soft with me not like an old fashioned Governess.

In 1990 my Father asked the family therapist whether I would have turned out better if I had been more strictly brought up.  The Family Therapist explained that it had nothing to do with up bringing but because of Asperger Syndrome.  She must have gone by the remark about mild Autism by the Psychiatrist in 1976.

I was not in the room when my Parents had that conversation.

That meant my Father stopped blaming my Mother for the way I turned out.

We also accepted that I was Autistic when it was explained that I had Asperger Syndrome a kind of High Functioning Autism.

 He thought I should have been smacked more as a child.

I saw my Father in 2006 just before he died.

He told me that it was wrong at Perse Boarding House Cambridge in the 1930s before the war to cane boys for talking after lights out.  He said it was also wrong recently to take away completely the right of teachers to cane and that is why children are so badly behaved.  In other words he thought it was wrong going from one extreme to the other.

I do not think it is possible to have a middle way as teachers abused their right to hit children.

He died in March 2006 of a Heart attack aged eighty-five years old.

David

Goatworshiper said:

They said 6 weeks on the 12/6/12. It realy annoy's me that its near enough 8 weeks later and no one has made any effort to get in touch.

.....If the assesment is out of your local NHS PCT area they will have to apply for the funding (and it takes a while). Get the phone number and give the 'autism expert' a ring, just to make sure they have your referal.....

If you want a disgnoses tell your GP that you are not coping and need to see a Psychiatrist. You then might be able to convince him that you have Autism.

If he agrees he might diagnose you himself or send you to see an Autism expert.

Perhaps he might give you a provisional diagnoses of Autism until an expert has time to see you.

I was not initially diagnosed by Autisim experts but Professor Pat Howlin confirmed that I have Asperger Syndrome.

If you just want a diagnoses and do not have a crisis it will take a very long time to get a diagnoses as the National Health Service is very short of resources.

David

Goatworshiper said:

They said 6 weeks on the 12/6/12. It realy annoy's me that its near enough 8 weeks later and no one has made any effort to get in touch.

I can give this advise, but never seem to do a good job taking it.  You should be patient, but not shy about it.  I'm normally not patient at all, and totally shy.  I'd say contact whom ever you can to check on the status.

I often have that problem about people failling to reply to a subject I am interested in.

Anyway as explained in previous  E Mails my diagnoses came my way without me looking for it.

David

They said 6 weeks on the 12/6/12. It realy annoy's me that its near enough 8 weeks later and no one has made any effort to get in touch.

Thank you for your kind wishes.