Going to a concert on your own

I almost went to Edinburgh on my own to see Devo, But I was busy that week and wasn't able to go. I was really gutted. But I don't think I would have gone on the trip alone anyway. 

I am awaiting an autism assessment but I believe I am on the autistic spectrum.

Music is a love of mine and a great way to escape the world around me. I love going to gigs and usually go alone. Whilst I am quite anxious as I arrive at the venue, I am fine as soon as the band gets going. At that point, we are all looking and listening to the same thing. The number of people around me loses its grip as I am only focused on the performance.

Going alone means I can leave if need be without it impacting on anyone else. 

Put me in a shopping centre or conference hall with that many people and I'd be anything but OK. For me, music is a key part of who I am and how I cope with this world.

I was thinking today when joining in on another conversation here with a The Smiths fan that I was into the Madchester scene at the time (leading up to going to see Therapy? in 1994) so I see now there was a theme developing there...

Love the bit about the crowd surfing - great story

I've tried going to many things over the years (although I don't think I've ever seen Muse unless it was in their early days and I don't remember e.g. I see now that they're from Teignmouth, Devon and formed in 1994 when I was living in that area) but with hindsight it was all 'too much' for me really. Therefore I've tended to approach it all over the years as like 'going to war' (as that's what it's all been like for me I see now and coincidentally I have a lot of military influence in my family history all round). I went alone to see Therapy? live (funnily enough I'd never actually had any therapy treatment at that time and went on to have a lot in my future) at Exeter University in 1994. I was in the mosh pit area and realised I needed to take a leak but was struggling to get out of the crowd/action so used my initiative and asked people around me to crowdsurf me onto the stage. They did so and I was escorted away to use the toilet and was permitted to return to the crowd afterwards #GoodTeamwork (sort of). The next day with my fellow students in the Devon area I was quite proud of the black eye I'd picked up during the crowdsurfing activity.

I've been to many concerts over the years - once on my own.
I'm a Muse fan and went to see them at Wembley Arena with my wife years ago. The gig was so good that I bought a ticket for the following night (my wife didn't want to go again).

Yes, the second night (on my own) was a bit different in both good and bad ways. I was alone - nobody that I know to share that experience with. On the plus side, I didn't need to worry about anyone else.

Going slight off topic, the last gig I went to was Muse at Milton Keynes bowl (terrible venue).
I went with my daughter (27) and was getting so anxious in the days leading up to the. My biggest concern was getting there and back. Whilst MK is only about 20 miles away, the venue is a pain to get to and there going to be a lot of road closures around the venue. 

Even on the morning on the gig I wasn't sure that I could manage it. My daughter's partner was taking us and picking us up. We had plan A, plan B and plan C! At the end of the night we had to come up with plan D!

We stood quite far back, away from the crowds (although usually I don't mind getting nearer the front). The biggest downer was when I went to get something to eat. The queues were insane. I missed all of Royal Bloods set, could hear them but they were out of sight. I queued for 1 hour! for a couple of trays of stupidly priced loaded fries. I was getting so anxious about how much longer would it take as well as worrying about my daughter as I'd left her watching the concert. I managed to survive the queue, but was very close to meltdown a couple of times - took a lot of strength and resolve to get through it.

Yeah I think if I was in a better place I would have gotten more out of it. I'd had so much baggage and I don't think one evening out was ever going to help but I knew I wasn't going to be doing anything else that was very productive.

HMO said:

I went to this because I just needed to do something nice for a change

That's good you should do nice things for yourself. That's why I went to the Take That concert as I'd been in a bad place. Though it didn't go as well as I had hoped it would I did enjoy it prior to my meltdown.

That's where I've been. The last 6 months have been the worst in my life and I scared away every friend I ever had. I went to this because I just needed to do something nice for a change. I guess I didn't realise how it would feel.

I hope you find it a better experience than I did. I wasn't in a good place mentally either, I think that was a factor I didn't originally realise.

I intend to go and see Take That next year but I hope it's a bit less overwhelming. 

Well done for going despite feeling stressed. I'm glad you managed to go. 

I've been to one live concert before to see Take That. I didn't enjoy it, there music was sensational but the volume of people and the noise was unbearable. I had to leave before the concert was even halfway through. I do all my concert watching on YT now, it's safer for me.

Thank you. When two women just screamed randomly in my ear as I was walking out, that bugged me but less so once I heard them do it to someone else (so they weren't just targeting me). 

Yeah the self-consciousness at the beginning is how I felt. Especially when you consider the demographic of the band I went to see. 

I'm glad you enjoyed your experience. 

I've already been to the cinema on my own and gone into the city centre on my own and I often feel I want to do more with others (who I enjoy the company of).

I probably could have waited yeah, somewhere I'd have looked not-dodgy!

Well done for going. It is an achievement, one that you'll hopefully look back on and remember.

I've only ever been to a concert on my own once, to see Bon Jovi in my early 20s. It was my first (and last) experience of a concert and I really had no idea what to expect. I had no friends to ask and my mum had never been to a concert.

The hardest part was arriving early and having to wait for it to start. It was only then that I realised I seemed to be the only one on my own. Most other people seemed to be there in groups, they were loud and I had no easy way to escape the unwanted noise. I became quite self conscious and I just wanted to disappear and for the music to start. When the concert actually started all that disappeared and I was able to enjoy the experience.

I've never been to a concert on my own, but I did once leave an outdoor concert on my own, which I won't deny I found somewhat stressful due to the sheer volume of people.

Kudos to you though for going to that concert by yourself. Hopefully, your memories of the actual concert will last far longer than any stress you experienced. 

Ahh well done for going on your own! Hope for all the scary things you managed to have a really good time. Maybe it will give you the confidence to do some more things on your own? I used to love JLS, not listened to them in a while but imagine it was a really good concert! 

I always find the rush of everyone leaving a lot to deal with and also really begrudge leaving early to miss the crowds as you miss often some of the best songs! I haven’t coped with going to a concert for ages now, but would it work if you just waited somewhere out of the way for everyone else to leave and let all the people wanting to rush go first?