Cinema, Theatre and Public Transport.

A while ago my Mum and I went to the theatre. I contacted the venue beforehand and said we were very anxious about attending, and they allowed us to enter the building by a back door, without queuing, and take our seats. They were so helpful. We chose seats near the back, one of us on the end of the row, and enjoyed the show! I emailed them afterwards to say that we were only able to attend the show due to them being so kind and helpful to us. 

Well done.

That is quite the achievement. You should be proud of yourself for doing it.

Just wanted to update a cinema  post I did 4 months ago, went back to the same local small art deco cinema and the whole experience was much better. I emailed the cinema this time and was told the film starts 25 minutes after the advertised time. Booked an end of aisle seat so only my wife sat near me and we went in just a few minutes before the film started. Film was not too long and didn’t shutdown this time.

Still learning how small alterations can make going out bearable, The realisation of autism has taught me that every day is a learning day.

I also find that, if there is aggression to be found, you'll find people at their most frustrated and shirt tempered on public transport. This is then compounded by mass of people, perhaps by delays, then ramped up in the rain or summer heat to maximum effect.

What I'm trying to say is, why the hell does anyone not see how flawed a concept PT is!? That's even before you consider sensitivities, disabilities, or post pandemic protocols!??

I understand the germ aspect, if someone coughs more than once, I’m gone. I don’t think we like being caged with the humans, it’s like locking a dog and cat in together.

It's not just weird  you. I can't do cinemas or public transport, I can actually but I prefer not to, much too much for me. My husband took me to a cinema last year the experience was horrible. I kept fidgeting in my seat, I had to wear ear plugs, I developed a tickle in my throat, it was far from an ideal experience for us both and I think I unintentionally annoyed everyone else who was there.

Public transport is okay but I still don't like it. There's germs, people talk loudly on their phones, children cry and run around wildly and trains and buses are unnecessarily loud.

Hey good job though mate, you did it that's an accomplishment you can be proud of 

I couldn't go to the cinema. I last went with my sister, she wanted to see the latest Star Wars and it was her birthday so I went with her. It was hell. Packed, could hardly breathe in there. I found the screen too bright for my liking, ended up wearing my sunglasses and the sound was too loud. I avoided a meltdown in there but in the car before we got on our way I broke down. I've not been back since.

I avoid public transportation at all costs. That's why I learnt to drive, public transportation makes me too anxious to use. Driving can be stressful but at least it's only me, no strangers. 

I commuted in London for over 10 years. After daily panic attacks, development of IBD, and a breakdown, I conceded it wasn't for me!!

I then got diagnosed. So now all makes sense.

I've been trying to get myself to go back to London ever since, just to visit, but it seems I can't even force myself to get on a train (or travelling prison cells as I know them to be) because of the clostraphobia.

I have to remind myself that humans where never meant to travel overland by train, or underground on the tube. We should be outdoors, free, and not pressed against 100 other people with cold&flu at 8am on a Monday morning.

We aren't the strange ones here

Thanks, that’s very similar to our evening, we got into the cinema an hour before the film started, it gradually filled apart from the 4 seats to the side of me, I kept looking and they were still empty, I thought I had won, you can guess the rest, 30 seconds before the film started the seats were filled. I think by then, I had already wound myself up. If we go again, we will book an isle seat and one next to it so my wife is a barrier.

You've reminded me of the time when a small cinema opened up near me...

I plucked up the courage to go on my own. I arrived early and chose a seat that I figured would be as far away from other people as possible. The cinema began to fill quickly and a group seemed to be taking an interest in the seats surrounding me, then they left. Next thing they are back with a member of staff, who asks for my ticket and points out I am in the wrong seat  I had no idea that the numbers on my ticket meant that I was supposed to sit in a specific seat. Nobody had told me or even asked where I wanted to sit.

I moved to where I was directed but soon realised that the cinema was going to be completely full, without an empty seat anywhere. I was surrounded by noisy people in close proximity on all sides and I became very overwhelmed. I panicked and left before the film even started. All I managed to see was a couple of adverts!

Unsurprisingly that experience completely put me off ever going back again.

I like public transport; as driving stresses the Hell out of me; that's just driving locally, no way could I handle driving in Belfast. PLus, parking prices there are through the roof.

Park-and-rides are godsends; for me.

cant stand transport, especially if it is busy too busy I run off. 

I love the theatre and it is lovely to go to the theatre and concert halls. Classical music is relaxing

I accidentally kabedoned a girl on a bus because it went over a bump once.

en.m.wikipedia.org/.../Kabedon

Peter said:

Or standing trying to avoid the sway of the bus throwing you onto someone’s lap.

I actually did that once when quite a lot younger.

I went into a train carriage, the train jerked and I did a twirl and sat on a man's lap.

Not one of my finest moments.

No I can relate, at least to the underground. Cinemas not so much. Cinemas have nice wide seats with arm rests. That’s usually enough for me. Busses, you’re  pressed up right against people in the seat next to you. Or standing trying to avoid the sway of the bus throwing you onto someone’s lap.

but the underground is so much worse. It’s like ‘hello I was just trying to ride public transport but apparently what we’re doing here is playing group 7 minutes in heaven.’ One more reason I prefer to drive.

Thanks for your reply, I just realised what has changed, an old art deco cinema has recently reopened near to us, it’s just had a massive restoration. We have started using at as it’s really nice, problem is it’s always full, my wife books tickets months ahead. The same film will only be shown twice. Before we always went to the big multi screen cinema, I never bothered going until a film had been released for ages, normally pretty well had the place  to ourselves. I wonder what it is with us, I can actually feel the presence of someone near to me. By the end of the film I’m like a hedgehog in a ball. Our multi screen has started doing screenings once a month for autistic people, I would just feel a bit odd as it mainly attracts autistic children. Public transport I tend to not use if I can help it.

It's not just you. If I ever have to sit next to a stranger I'm leaning over to one side as far away from them as possible. If I find myself sandwiched between strangers it is a complete nightmare, one which I'll do anything to avoid. Last time I was on a plane I ended up sandwiched between strangers for 8 hours 

I haven't been to the cinema for years but I used to try and go at quiet times. If you wait until the film has been showing for a while and most people have already seen it then it's more likely there'll be plenty of empty seats.

Public transport is the same. When I used to travel with my mum it was ok. I would get the window seat and she would sit next to me 'shielding' me from other people. When I have to travel alone that's not possible. I try putting my bag on the adjoining seat but if it's reserved seats that won't work. 

Roy said:

“ how’s your autism now,”

I'd want to reply, "same as ever, thanks, how's your neurotypicalness?" Or should that be neurotypicality?

Roy said:

or is it just weird me?

Excellent.

Well said.

And no it isn't just weird you. I can't remember the last time I went to the cinema and I don't think I enjoyed it last time I went. Probably why I never went back!

Places like those aren't for people like me. Too stuffy and loud. No I prefer watching a movie from the comfort of my own home, though, have to say, there is something almost alluring about going to the cinema. I like the idea but I'm aware other people will be there, who will likely, but unintentionally, ruin the entire experience for me.

Good luck with the move, Cornwall is lovely, I hope you'll all be happy there. I used to holiday there on a yearly basis, the whole family would get together every September for a holiday.