Christmas & Hugging

Noooo that one can backfire haha, I've tried that one in the past and had someone go "that's okay so have I" made it so much worse because then I couldn't get out of it, all while making this face:

Here's wishing you good luck. I hope it turns out for the best. =)

I understand what you are saying. My family weren't into loads of hugging. I try where possible to greet or say goodbye quickly, avoiding hugs where possible.

I'm sorry you're feeling this a bit - I would in your situation as well. I hope it'll all be ok and won't get you too distressed.

I don't like hugs at all. I don't really like being touched or close to anybody - it makes me feel very uncomfortable and causes panic attacks. I like my own space and will only hug when I feel comfortable enough.

I'm thinking along the same thoughts as Martin, saying you have a cold coming on will stop you being hugged. No one wants to catch that, especially before Christmas.

Hope it all goes well :) 

Sam likes to draw ,

I understand what you mean in terms of strangers.  I HATE when people sit next to me on a bus and sit too close! It makes me silently seeth.  I also recoil when strangers brush past me but not to the same degree as you describe.  That's so upsetting to hear you go through that.  :-(. 

Just say that you feel like you have a cold coming on, then they won't want to hug you.

Thanks everyone - I think it's going to be a case of a little uncomfortable awkward moment for a lifetime of comfort afterwards! I think my partners' parents will be happy to relay the message before we arrive too. Thanks so much for your perspectives everyone

I must admit that with people I know well and feel comfortable with (such as family and friends), I don't have an issue with hugging. It's a different story though when people I don't know well are wanting to exchange hugs.

If I was in your shoes and was worried that not hugging might cause offence, I think I might be tempted to say that I was unable to hug because I'd got painful skin sensitivity. Alternatively, I'd just be honest and explain that I wasn't a very huggy person (they don't need to know why).

ABPH93

I can usually and usually want to hug most people (familiar) at these things but I do understand, I have felt the awkward pressure to also hug the +1 (stranger) that a relative invited after hugging everyone else so they don't feel left out and the best thing I have found is to have a pre-loaded socially acceptable excuse of somewhere else I need to go right that second so they don't take it personally they got missed. (Usually saying "oh I need to go to the loo rn so sorry" and then wait in the bathroom until the huggy moment has passed.) Or have an immediate remedy for the feeling afterwards (if you read my other reply) sometimes that can be changing into back-up jumper/t-shirt afterwards, and if anyone asks why the wardrobe change I just say I spotted a mark on the other one.
I'm guessing if there's usually drinks involved though the former method might work best for you. Sorry that's the best I can advise without just saying "sorry I'm just not much of a hugger".

I can appreciate both of your sentiments honestly, with friends and family you will not find a more affectionate person, but if a stranger so much as brushes past me it mentally turns me inside out, I want to do stuff like change clothes immediately. I can't just ignore it either I can feel where they bumped into me "burning" for hours later If I'm not able excuse myself to slap hand sanitiser on the area or remove that item of clothing.
I do have OCD but THIS IS NOT OCD: I don't feel worried I'm gonna get ill or have some misfortune. It is the autism sensory thing where I'm hyper sensitive, it just feels excrutiating, and I need to remedy it somehow.

NAS83865,

I am a huggy person but I do understand what it's like to accept hugs when you don't want them - overwhelming!  You could make an excuse saying that you're painful so not wanting hugs before anyone demands one.

My friend told me sometime back that she hated hugs and I was sad because we'd always shared a hug on meeting.  I now check with people before I give a hug.  I've always checked with my daughter because she's Autistic and i want her to feel comfortable.  She now comes to me when she needs a hug which's more special because I know it's wanted and not forced.  I get frustrated when my Mum tells my daughter to give her hugs but I always ask my daughter if she's okay with it and she says she is.  She doesn't see my Mum much so it's probably the truth or I hope it is...

I'd ask for a family meeting and say that you're not wanting hugs because you're feeling sensitive.  You could then use that as a reason to leave the drunken celebrations a little early to retreat to somewhere cosy for your own time......

Best of luck.