Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi!
I am very newly diagnosed, but have always hated physical contact, especially with people I'm not emotionally very close to. During COVID, it's been very easy to navigate not hugging people, using COVID-anxiety as a reason. However we're now "out" of that where I am, and we're having our first big christmas, with my partners extended family on Boxing Day.
They're all very loud and touchy-feely, which I've always struggled with. Especially now I have a diagnosis, I'm less inclined to just "suck it up". I shouldn't have to, but I also don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, nor do I want everyone knowing about the ASD. I've already had the "ooh I didn't think you would be autistic".
What do other people do in this situation? It's causing me a lot of anxiety and stress! I've managed to get out of the food portion of the evening but this means going a little later when people have had drinks too...
Help :D
I must admit that with people I know well and feel comfortable with (such as family and friends), I don't have an issue with hugging. It's a different story though when people I don't know well are wanting to exchange hugs.
If I was in your shoes and was worried that not hugging might cause offence, I think I might be tempted to say that I was unable to hug because I'd got painful skin sensitivity. Alternatively, I'd just be honest and explain that I wasn't a very huggy person (they don't need to know why).