Autistic boyfriend can’t keep a job - any advise would help

plenty of people enjoy their jobs, regardless of money

Then they are in the mega job, crap money category - like working in a donkey sanctuary - lots of satisfaction, need to steal some carrots to eat.     If they had loads more money they'd be in the Richard Branson category.

I agree that it is simplified - but it's actually very true.   

He's suffering from a maths problem - we only make up a small percentage of the population so limiting himself to that small area probably won't work out for him.    We tend to gravitate to other auties/aspies because it's less stressful than dealing with NTs.  

Are you able to talk to him about all this?    It seems he's aiming at the jobs where we will fail.

Also, any supervisor where he works should be made to understand that letting the staff pick on him opens them up to financial jeopardy if he takes them to a tribunal under the equalities act.- basically put a rocket up their bums to get with the program.

Prepare for the worst and hope for the best. 

It’s normally the work load that he can’t deal with. He goes for jobs which anyone would find stressful (he works in care - he wants to only work with people who are autistic but they end up getting him to work with other mental illnesses/disabled people but that isn’t his interest). I personally don’t think he should work in this field just because how it affects him mentally but he keeps going back to it. The longest job he has had since I’ve been with him was a behind a bar in a restaurant where he didn’t have to speak to any customers but the people he worked with picked on him for not understanding their jokes. So it’s kind of a mixture of both. 

Hey :) as others have said on here, the reality is that lots of autistic people struggle to get jobs, and those that do may struggle to keep them. It's usually a combination of the person (such as your boyfriend) having difficulties that the company either can't, or won't, accommodate for. Of course jobs aren't meant to be easy by any means though, and you need money to live.

You're not the first person to be in this position and ask this, and you defo won't be the last. At the end of the day, you have to think about the worst-case scenario (that he can't get a job), where you will have to provide. If you think you can make things work in that scenario and want to, then you can go ahead as you are, and if he gets a job, then that's a bonus. But if you don't think things will work with you two without him having a job, it will be really difficult to live together, as well as have a family etc. You might then have to put off those goals (e.g having a family) until you can afford it. Then, you might reconsider whether this relationship can work practically (e.g. financially), irrespective of how much you love each other. It's really up to you, but you need to have a think about this kind of thing, and maybe this is something you can discuss together going forward.

Much love <3

Have to note that this is a really simplified way of looking at things - plenty of people enjoy their jobs, regardless of money or "quality"!

What is it about the job that becomes the problem?   Is it the work or the people?     Does he have the ability to just go in, do what's needed and take the cash or does he try too hard to make the job fit his needs?   Is is a lack of clarity in the task?     What causes his inability to cope?

Every job I've had have agreed to lots of accommodations but rarely deliver them.     NTs just don't seem to care enough to be constant in their actions.

Hi, 

I’m not asking for a big house or lots of money. We bought our first house together last year so we both agreed to get a mortgage of which now I’m the one paying it (along with the bills and groceries) so I’ve become pretty stretched as far as pay check goes. I’m actually having to ask for money from my family so we can get through each month.

My view on life is just want us to be happy but unfortunately you need money to get through life.

Id love to be able to support him financially but I can’t. He wants a job so he can afford to go on holidays and do fun things but he’s just started this new one and already wants out. What can I do to help him? I do tell him that it’s not about what you do so long as you enjoy it.

He is at his happiest when he is not working but after a few weeks of that he is ready to try work again. It always seems that not one company that he has worked for will adjust their way of doing things to accommodate his needs. He tells them from the beginning and then he is just ignored. 

Just feeling lost right now and I don’t know who to talk to about all this. 

Can you be my PR please?...lol

Hi - sorry - got some bad news for you - the vast majority of autistic people are unable to hold down a job.    We are poor at playing the NT social game so we stick out like a sore thumb so are bullying targets - and we require very clear and concise instructions and no interruptions while we work - and most workplaces can't be bothered to put the effort in to accommodate us.

There's also a rule of thumb about jobs - there are really only 4 types:

1  Crap job, crap money = most jobs

2  Mega job, crap money = common jobs like vocational, charities, working with animals etc.   Lots of these jobs around where you struggle to survive.

3  Crap job, mega money = rare jobs like stock markets or banking where you get loads of dosh, but hate every second of it - but you have the early retirement option to make it worth doing.

4  Mega job, mega money = rarest of all jobs like a Richard Branson position.

Staying with him depends very much on your aspirations in life - if you want the big house and loads of money, you might want to re-think things.

If you really understand and want what makes you both happy, your view of life might need to change.