Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi All,
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years he has Autism and I’m a NT . We have always had ups and downs and he has always been in and out of work he has just started a new job (1 week in) and already wants to quit. I struggle with reacting in a sympathetic way. I worry about the money side of things - I don’t make enough to cover all our outgoings. So this is my first reaction. He doesn’t think I’m being supportive enough but I’m too worried about money.
Im at a loss of how to feel. I want him to be happy and have a job he loves but I also need him to make enough money to support himself. we talk about having a family one day and I just don’t see how that is possibly.
I’m not really sure what I’m asking or who will see this. Any advise would be helpful.
thanks x
Hi - sorry - got some bad news for you - the vast majority of autistic people are unable to hold down a job. We are poor at playing the NT social game so we stick out like a sore thumb so are bullying targets - and we require very clear and concise instructions and no interruptions while we work - and most workplaces can't be bothered to put the effort in to accommodate us.
There's also a rule of thumb about jobs - there are really only 4 types:
1 Crap job, crap money = most jobs
2 Mega job, crap money = common jobs like vocational, charities, working with animals etc. Lots of these jobs around where you struggle to survive.
3 Crap job, mega money = rare jobs like stock markets or banking where you get loads of dosh, but hate every second of it - but you have the early retirement option to make it worth doing.
4 Mega job, mega money = rarest of all jobs like a Richard Branson position.
Staying with him depends very much on your aspirations in life - if you want the big house and loads of money, you might want to re-think things.
If you really understand and want what makes you both happy, your view of life might need to change.
Can you be my PR please?...lol