Scared

They usually let you go through your probationary period before putting you forward for it - usually six months.  They want to be sure they're investing in the people they want to keep.  That's what I was told, anyway.  At the College, though, I asked what 'In a reasonable timeframe' meant, and was told 'As soon as you can.'  Great!  So... sometime in the next four years okay?

Another thing you will usually find is that if you leave the job within a year of completion of the qualification, they charge you for it.  And it's a lot of money.

Yeah, I finally clicked on to the fact that they say one thing but rarely follow through. 

In my last job ( the one I got fired from in August). The original documentation and job description mentioned that I would have to study towards a diploma in social work.  I worked there for five months and I never heard another word about it.

Good advice. It took me a while to suss it out but I finally realised that they don’t give a c**p about any of this stuff, so I gave it up as well. 

Hang in there, honestly I always feel like this first few weeks. No one gives a crap about these stupid tests, just tell them you'll settle in then tackle it. Then ignore it till someone hassles you, drag your feet, be 'too busy' - you'll be well settled in if it ever comes to anything.  I've just been told to complete a course on safely lifting heavy objects within a reasonable time. My job doesn't require me ever to lift anything heaviet than a laptop. I intend to treat this with the contempt it deserves and ignore ot till someone chases me - which might be 3 months, 6 months, or never. I know it's hard for us to ignore this crap but honestly they don't take it seriously. Hang in there, it'll all start to make more sense soon.

I can't really remember now.  It was something to do with having to exchange numbers for symbols.  I was okay with very basic stuff.  If x + 10 = 12, x = 2.  But when it started to get more complex, up into quadratic equations, I simply lost it and zoned out.  I didn't want to know.  But then, I was the same at school with most things.  School was really a waste of time for me.  I could read, write and count before I started.  By the time I left, 11 years later, I could read, write and count better.  That was about it.  Everything else passed me by.  I really, honestly didn't realise how ignorant I was - how very little I knew about just about everything: history, geography, the sciences - until I got to university at 28.  It must have seemed to my much-younger peers as if I'd crawled out of a cave.  I remember walking into a seminar room one day and seeing all these lines and numbers and symbols on the board and saying to another student 'What on earth is all that?'  She looked at it... and started to read through it.  'Fairly basic calculus formulae.  Stuff you do in A level maths.'  It was all I needed to know.  I thought it was truly remarkable that someone so young could make sense of it!

And there I was, with a Mensa IQ...

Martian Tom said:

I tried and tried with algebra, but anything beyond the very basics would not sink in

If you don't mind me asking what did you find difficult with algebra?  (I'm sincerely interested in this).  That's a common point where people fall off the train.  Another early one is fractions.  The combination of algebra and fractions often being the killer.

Thanks.  Yes, I've done some agency in the past, but wouldn't do it again.  The interview on Friday is at a place I worked 3 years ago.  i always liked it there.  Taken all in, it was probably one of the happiest work experiences I'd had for many years.  I know that if I can get back there, I can feel properly settled - and I'll probably stay there until I retire.  The people are nice, the working conditions are good... and it's just under two miles from where I live.  Ten minutes by bike, twenty on foot.  No traveling costs.  No need for a car.  Free meals.  Okay, it's back to full-time, and I won't get the College's long holidays.  But on balance, I'll opt for something known, familiar and liked.

Hi Tom,

I assume you already know this and wouldn't want to teach you to suck eggs (for those of us taking things literally, please don't go egg sucking!)

My OH works with autism and has done the "working for companies" thing and hated it. So she left and joined a couple of agencies - she was sent to some horrible places, but one place she really fitted into and they felt the same, so she is in the process of leaving the agency to go there full time. She has to complete 400hrs with the agency first, but they are all at the place she likes so it's no hassle.

Is that something you could do? It's a good way to find somewhere everyone is happy!

Already done that with the job I'm being interviewed for on Friday.  It might not look good - basically, 2 weeks in role - but I had to be honest about it.  They'll doubtless ask me about it at interview, and I'll just say I made a mistake.  It was the wrong move.  Full stop.  We all do make those mistakes, and I hope they'll understand that.  As I said, they were keen to interview me because they know my work, and that I'm good at it.  They were fair to me before by letting me take extended leave to care for my mother - and they said at the time that part of the reason they wanted me back was because I had taken on her care role.  She outlived expectations, though - a further seven months instead of what, considering her condition, should have been weeks.  Because of that, they couldn't hold my job open.  But they said they were sorry to lose me and would welcome any application I wanted to make in future.  I think that'll maybe override any uncertainty that my current very short-term job throws up.

You also don't need to mention it on your CV. No need for future employers to start asking questions :)

I've never been fired from a job and don't want to start now.  I'd sooner resign and move on.  My work coach said that, in the circumstances, it wouldn't affect my UC claim.

I've always advised 'never resign', too.  But I hate the limbo.  I don't know when I'm going to feel ready to go back.  Or maybe I should just go back next week and try to soldier on.  I think a big part of what happened last week was the need to assimilate all the information I was bombarded with on top of coming from a position where I hadn't completely recovered from the experience in my last job.  Last Tuesday, I got home and my head simply froze.  I couldn't deal with it all.  Having some time to let thngs settle into place has helped.  Having said that, though, they will not want me to return if it simply means going sick again.  I can't mess them around like that.  

I've got to check with my line manager whether I can do the GCSE under my own steam, or whether I need to do it as an evening class at the College.  Also, I need to check with her about the NVQ.  I rang her earlier and left a message.

The online courses are timed.  Many of them are three hours.  I think there's a cumulative total of 60 hours of online courses to do.  They cover a lot more ground than I was used to in care.  A lot of it seems superfluous, too, when you consider the student group I'm working with.  They are a special group.  Not really students, as such.  It's much more about daily care and sensory activities - like I was used to doing in the Day Centre I'm being interviewed for on Friday.

There is no getting around the qualifications.  I said that my degree should be enough, but she said that it's College policy to insist on having evidence of the certificates.  If you've lost all of your certificates and can't remember the examining body so that you can approach them again, you need to take the qualifications again.  I've said in the past with jobs that I have maths and English, and no one has ever bothered to check.  Here, though, proof is a statutory requirement.

Martian Tom said:

in spite of having a degree, I'd need to get the maths GCSE if I can't prove that I have any maths qualifications.

Do you have any maths qualifications?

I'm in a similar position with my English.  I never passed my English language O level.

I get round it by :

1. Straight faced lie.  I passed it 40 years ago. Can't find the certificate.
2. State that my degree and post graduate degree dissertation required good standard of English as proof that my English is adequate.
3. Some employers give maths and English tests as part of the recruitment process.  I pass with flying colours.   ( But fail the health and mental stability tests).

Never resign.  I made that mistake in the past.

If they fire you, then there's always a claim for unfair or constructive dismissal, if you have the stamina to go through the process.

My advice is do the online courses.  And the GCSE maths and see how the whole process goes.

I suspect some of the online courses could be short, very short.  Some of my initial induction training in my last job was just a box ticking exercise.  First safety and fire escapes.  20 seconds. There is the fire escape. Meet on grass on opposite side of road.  Box ticked.

Rang HR at the College this morning.  Quite a nerve-racking exchange.  They seem a bit vague on things.  Impatient-sounding.  The woman said that in spite of having a degree, I'd need to get the maths GCSE if I can't prove that I have any maths qualifications.  She said 'within a reasonable timeframe' means 'as soon as you can'.  On the NVQ, she said 'I'd assume you'd need to start that straight away.'  On a couple of other questions about salary, her answers were 'I'd assume...'

Why could they not have made any of this clear to me before?  Isn't it good policy to inform people, before getting their acceptance of a role, exactly what they will be expected to do?  The offer letter I got from them simply says:

The offer is naturally subject to our standard contract of employment.  It is also subject to successful completion of the pre-employment checks and reference requirements.

I think they should have been more specific.  And they should be less vague now.

I'm sick of this.  Perhaps I should just resign and be done with it.

My income will be steady, or steadily growing, and predictable, because I will intend it to be so from the start. 

I won’t accept anything less than £60 an hour, and that’s the starting pay and I will have at least one stream of passive income from the off. 

I’ll be offering 15 hour courses on self esteem, which is an introduction to metaphysics. The course will be £180 per person, for the in person course and I haven’t thought about a price for the same online version yet. 

I’ll be offering one to one metaphysical counselling sessions, in 3 formats. Face to face, online and via some kind of email service. 

I’ll also be offering spiritual treatments. For one off specific problems, such as irritation, anger or loss etc as well as more detailed and individualised treatments. 

And as my first passive stream of income, I’ll have a page on my website, as an amazon affiliate, for all the books I’ve read, and read, that have helped me to attain and maintain my current state of peace and happiness. Over time, I’ll write reviews for each of these books to help people make more informed choices. 

These are just my beginning plans, and they’re more than enough for starters. I’ll deal with the rest, as I come to them. 

As a strategy, I simply found what I was uniquely positioned to do, what I loved to do, what made me feel alive inside and excited, and I took it from there. Finding out what I loved to do etc was the hard part. It’s taken me almost six years to find out. With lots of ups and downs. But I decided that I wasn’t going to live if I couldn’t get off the hamster wheel that I seemed to be on and I was not going to compromise on that, not ever. 

It seemed like no matter what I achieved, how well I did, or what I did, I would only ever get so far and it would all come crashing down and none of it ever felt real.

A lot of this was explained by the diagnosis. But I found out a lot, by self examination, pre diagnosis and post. 

But I made the decision, that I was going to live my life, exactly to my liking, or not at all and I was not willing to compromise. 

So the pay off is amazing, but I paid a high price. I gave my whole life, I laid it on the line, but in doing so, I  found life. 

What kind of self-employment are you going into?  I was self-employed for 15 months once and found it very stressful because my income was so variable.  Some months I made enough to get by, other months I didn't and had to apply for benefits.  In the end, the constant ups and downs of it - the form-filling and proof-provision - made me glad to get back into a situation where I no longer had to worry about those things.  I had a steady, predictable income.  It would have worked out fine if it hadn't been for the unpredictable nature of a colleague.

I’ll be working for myself. It’s not that I don’t want to work, I love working, but no matter how I look at it, working for somebody else doesn’t work for me. So, my only other option therefore is to work for myself.

I worked out what it was that I loved doing most in my life and then I kind of worked out, with help, how a working life could fit into my life. For example, my first support worker, worked out that after three weeks, I’m ready for a break, so I’ll work 3 weeks and have a week off. I’ll also work 3 months and then have a month off and I’ll probably start with a 3 day week. 

Then I worked out what time I could start work, after I had finished my daily morning routine etc. I just kind of built it all up like that and now, it kind of happened all of a sudden, I’m starting a course tomorrow, which can see my working by mid May. But I’ve also got a space to work from and ideas of what I’ll do are somehow just coming to me. 

And the employment thing that the job centre have sent me on, through REED, have already referred me back to autism plus, I start my sessions tomorrow. And they also have a guy who helps people with self employment so I can go and see him as well, when I’m ready. 

I’m not putting any time scales on myself, I just have a feeling I might be working again by May. But if it takes longer than that, I’m cool with that as well. 

Reed can provide financial assistance as well and the support goes on for at least 18 months. And I don’t have to go to the job centre on a regular basis anymore, or hand sick notes in. So I’ve got more time now I don’t have to do those things. 

I just need support to do it all and that support will come chiefly from autism plus. 

I’m never going to work for anyone again. 

I thought you were preparing to return to work later in the year.  How will you manage to get around not working again?  I'd do it if I could.  Even with the other job I'm going for on Friday, they want an NVQ in Care.  That'll take me two years at least.  What's the point?  I've worked in care for 13 years, and successfully, without one.  In my last job, the manager had a Level 5 NVQ.... and was a hopeless carer!