Confused

Why do I care so much about what people think, why do I want to be liked by everyone but think that no-one does. Why do I trust people but at the same time trust no-one. Why do I want to love but at the same time am unable to feel it. Why do I have no compassion but know when I should be compassionate. And by god why do I dwell on thing sooo much that I end up making *** up that didn’t happen but could happen? Sorry if I’m rambling just confused with what goes on I’m my head

Also last week I was diagnosed with aspergers and I’ve noticed other aspies seem to have a talent or a passion ie computing, maths or engineering yet I have none.