Lack of motivation

something to look forward to then

Libraries are closed at the moment where I live, but I believe they will be opening soon. I can't wait until they do!

Do you have a routine?  I find that if I have one I tend to stick to it, also maybe you could visit your local library, I believe they have opened now.  My local town has a community facility which I'm going to volunteer at once I get my self sorted.

Great! Or take photos, make notes, collect things when out that catch your eye, a pretty leaf, an unusual stone or twig. It's amazing what simple things can spark our imagination and creativity. The patterns of light through trees, how shadows can look like something else. Describe a texture of something you touch. Have some fun, explore, chances are this will help with the work you have to do, inspire you and motivate you. Be the child you once were and look for the magic!

Yeah that's a good idea, cheers! I am mostly doing watercolours for this project though, which I need to do in my room, but I could go outside and do some sketching when the weather is decent.

Would it perhaps help to do field trips? Get outside and do some art in random places? Find a spot in the park, and draw, or whatever you need to do. 

Yeah I try to motivate myself with rewards but nothing seems to bring me joy at the moment... I think the loneliness and monotony of being stuck in my room, and going for the same walks over and over, have gotten to me.

Yeah I hope so too. To be honest, the possibility of visiting her, and getting away from here for a while, is the only thing keeping me going at the moment.

I'm on sertraline at the moment. It seems to be the one that works best for me without all the horrible side effects (I literally tried all of the antidepressants). I do take vitamin B complex, vitamin D and other supplements/nootropics, and I eat healthy food (I have to because I have IBS). That's the problem - I am doing everything I can to try to alleviate depression but it seems to be a stubborn beast.

To be honest, I'm not sure if I am enjoying this course anymore. This is partly due to the fact that we have to do everything from home/online, and I'm quite a physical person. I find it hard to make art on command, if I don't feel like it. I do really need to pass this course though, so I can get onto the next one. I think I would feel a lot more inspired if I could go to campus and interact with other creative individuals, and be in a space other than my room, but this hasn't been an option this year due to Covid.

As for my friends, I do have other friends who live in other cities/countries and I speak to them on the phone/on video call occasionally, but they're all busy with their jobs, relationships, social lives etc. I don't really think I have close friends at the moment. I made most of my friends before my diagnosis and eventual burnout, when I successfully pretended to be neurotypical, had a job, looked good, had a social life etc but all these things are gone now as they were unsustainable for me. Lots of people have distanced themselves from me since I stopped working and went on benefits, stopped drinking, dressing up etc.

I hope you get to visit your Aunt later on. Face to face interaction with someone we are close to can make all the difference.

Can I ask you about your medication. If you are not sleeping, is there an antidepressant that you can take to help with that. I know that sleeping pills are out and I never found them to help - always felt drowsy afterwards anyway. But finding the right tablets has really helped me. They won't help the loneliness, but at least if you are having refreshing sleep that will help with motivation.

The other thing I did for my son was start him on vitamin D as he wasn't getting much sun. This has helped him a little. But his diet is not the best, so it might be different for you.

What things do you enjoy about your course?

Hi, sorry you're feeling so lonely and unmotivated. What works for me when I'm I have no motivation to do what I need to is set small challenges. Each morning decide on something you're going to do and set a reward for its completion. Such as plan my next piece of work then have a pretend spa in the bath. Use things you like and enjoy as your motivation. For loneliness, could you set up a face time with friends once a week, arrange a time to get together online? Or whatever will work for you. That could be motivating also as you would want something positive to mention. I'm sorry if that doesn't help. Hope you feel better soon.

Yeah, I'm glad I have my Aunt at least. I told her about my loneliness but there's not much she can do to help at the moment due to the distance between us, apart from the occasional phone call. Also, she's really busy at the moment so I don't want to pester her too much. I am hoping to be able to visit her this year but it all depends on vaccines etc. 

And yeah, I find studying from home very difficult. I'm also permanently exhausted - it takes me ages to get out of bed in the morning, and I tend to go to bed quite early (around 8-9pm) but can't fall asleep until around midnight. So there is a small window during the day, during which I have some spoons. I am making very slow progress and it's worrying.

I'm glad you have an aunt you can talk to. Though it can be hard to open up and talk about loneliness. And other people can just not realise how lonely life can get. I think that Covid has made college life a really lonely experience and with mental health issues (which I have also) it can be a double whammy. There are quite a few folk on here who are artistic, so hopefully  they could become a source of support for you. 

That's good you have got some support from your course. I am prepared for my son failing the first year and just hoping that he might be able to repeat it - though it would be emotionally devastating for him, if he did fail. 

When is the best time of day for you to do work? Are you sleeping okay - my son is continually tired so this has no helped him. When I am depressed, I find it very difficult to concentrate. Is this an issue for you?

Already have - I got an extension for mental health reasons, but I'm extremely behind and need to do something about it... I really need to pass this course. 

Heh thanks. And no. I have an Aunt that I have a good relationship with, but she lives in another country. We speak on the phone once in 2 weeks. I am extremely lonely - I have about 4 good friends, all of whom are busy with their full-time jobs/partners/pets so I don't get to see them often.

What about contacting the tutor and explaining the problems?     I'm sure you're not the only one.

Nope, since I don't know them... 

My  son is studying at the moment and has been getting behind in his course and is going to have to resit some of his assessments in the summer. I think that isolation has played a part of this. I think that you are doing so well managing to do all that you are. I would find not seeing another person for two weeks, very isolating. 

Do you have any family that can support you at the moment?

Are you able to do zoom chats with any of the others?

Does the college have a support team?

I haven't actually met/don't know anyone else on my course - I started it in September last year, and it's only been online. Never got a chance to go to campus because of Covid.

Hiya

What are you looking for?    What do you think would help?        I could only suggest a study-buddy to compare work and progress with.

Is there anyone peppy and positive you could chat to to brighten you up?   Or would that just demoralise you more?