I want life to stop

Lights, sounds, smells, everything is extra intolerable lately. I cant seem to make myself do stuff, I cant make decisions. I feel tired and am getting headaches. Words are harder. I keep almost having meltdown/shutdowns (just today I felt like a meltdown every 30min). Im exhausted 

I want it all to stop, I want to take a break from everything but I cant. I have homework, I have school, on friday we have an assembly which I always get overwhelmed at but im scared ill have a full on meltdown because I seem to not even be able to handle everyday stimuli so how could I survive a room with hundreds of students with everyone screaming to get hyped for stupid turnabout dance 

I started feeling like rubbish for a couple weeks but then the last 3 days have been absolutly unbearable. Why is life so hard

Took me 21min to type this (not even that long of a post...)

  • Thats a good idea, but do you think theyd even listen? I dont have a doctor diagnosis and to them I did just fine with the other 10 years of school, so id probably just be making it up or being lazy. I know people here say self diagnosis is valid but I feel like if I dont have an official diagnosis then nobody will listen. 

    But I think ill give it a try. I just have no idea what ill say

  • It's the same for me - the curse of autism, being unable to talk most of the time! - I write down what I want to say to my school counselor and she writes back as she knows it is easier for me. You might find that easier, I did for sure a lot easier. Our school had an email system too a few years ago but it's gone now unfortunately.

  • hi . idk when the mods post this but um i hope you're ok . if feels as if u feel suicidal and overwhelmed with everything . it's understandable . 

  • Have you spoken to the school counselor, if your school has one? Also if you talk to your teachers and ask for some extra support they should oblige and cut you some slack.

    I havent. Im not great at talking to people (if I manage to talk at all)

  • Is it possible the time of year isn’t helping?

    Maybe?

    Doesn’t your school make any allowances for additional sick time because of your condition?

    I dont think so. But either way they dont know im autistic so it wouldnt matter

  • Hi. I'm so sorry to hear how difficult you're finding things of late. I go to school and can understand a lot of what you're saying. Have you spoken to the school counselor, if your school has one? Also if you talk to your teachers and ask for some extra support they should oblige and cut you some slack.
    How you're feeling is legit and you need to be supported with your struggles throughout the difficult times. Don't suffer in silence it could lead you to burnout or worse. The time of year makes everything worse imo, I think things will look and feel better when the weather is warmer and brighter.

    Hang in there. You'll get through this and you will feel better. Time heals.

  • Is it possible the time of year isn’t helping? I had to take three days off work last week and I’m still barely functional and my social media is full of people who seem to be suffering from January blues.

    Doesn’t your school make any allowances for additional sick time because of your condition?

  • I dont know... im already over the year limit of absences. And im failing english class, then ill just end up more behind in everything. Ill just end up with a huge load of work and probably wouldnt have had enough time to feel better

  • Can you take some mental health days off from school?

    This might help.