Autism & Significant Disability?

I feel same as op...i dont even feel like i  compare to other people with a diagnosis. Its very demoralising. I was just allowed to be a child most of life then bam...its overwhelming. Feel free to pm me op.

hi,

animals help me alot also.i can get very lonely and low and wish i could work and find identity in that ..but i just dont cope with it and break down.animals enable us to be loved and give love and have a bond that is hard with humans.

holding and stroking an animal calms me down alot.its just sad that many mental heath housing i have lived in ban animals....

crazy really...as if people arent isolated enough then rules are made to reinforce that isolation.

im hoping to get a pet or two very soon.i think it will help alot.but ive been warned that if i need to move into sheltered housing again i"ll have to give them up..crazy...

Hi Harry

I can sympathize with much you are feeling having been diagnosed with AS later on in life and yes its very tough. I have suffered from years of depression and it came as a relief to find some sort of reason for not feeling like everyone else. I have not worked now for three years - and I am someone who desperately wants to work - but know that it needs to be the right work for me. I have yet to find this but won't give up trying to find it!

So in the meantime I have taken a different tact - finding things I enjoy doing. Since going back to my one passion in life - animals, particulalrly horses - I am beginning to savour the joy of "being in the moment" when I am riding. Its just half an hour a week and I feel very nervous before I go but the positive benefits of finding and doing something you enjoy (with no pressure) is immense. 

Is there any hobby that you are passionate about? If so, although you may feel its all a bit pointless, I would say go with it for a bit and see how you feel. The fact that you have signed up to this community forum is a positive thing to have done so you should give yourself a metaphorical pat on the back for this alone!

That's good to hear Harry, I hope the assessment and the legal support helps. :)

How nice of you to ask :) I knew this would be a cut above the average internet forum...

I've got a new community care assessment next week and a solicitor working on things too. I don't feel tremendously hopeful given the current situation but... ho hum... we'll have to wait and see...

Hi Harry,

How are you doing at the moment? Is there any kind of service you think might help that would direct you towards? I don't know what you may have already tried, you mention you've been in contact with professionals so don't want to suggest what hasn't been helpful so far.

stressed out :( will reply later...

sometimes the only thing that keeps me going is knowing that i will emigrate soon to a quieter more natural part of the world... it's not stressful everywhere...

Perhaps a lot depends on support . . whether it be from understanding and accepting family and friends or from support agencies.

Hopefully the young ones on the spectrum will be less damaged when they reach adulthood in  afew years than I consider myself to be.

I think late diagnosis can mean having lived a very challenging life and the resulting negative  effects . Some bruises don't heal and  invisible injuries can be disabling too.

However positive you try to be, the world outside remains the same and we are in the minority.

We are all different from each other even though we share autism and we have all had different life experiences. 

When I read the posts here from parents who clearly value their children on the spectrum , as do I, I feel a pain in my chest.

Unrecognised autism  . . . autism isn't the curse . . . but the reaction to to it can be .

I dream of encountering empathy.

hi harry,

your not alone..i really relate to what you said.despite going to uni as a youth ive been unable to live independantlly for over 10 years and when ive worked,have broken down eventually..

the stress and strain of trying to cope each day have had a burning out effect on me and has led to chronic depression,ocd and anxiety.i cant go too far alone now.self medicating with alcohol, whilst concerning, is also understandable when each day is so hard.i guess its like having to run on 10 batteries when weve only got 4....exhausting.

my take on it is that its not all about you trying to be positive or try harder ,but rather that its about services and support being available to you and me to help to minimise the chronic impact of every day stresses that most people take for granted...

our disability is invisible and that leads to expectations that we cant always live up to.trying harder can lead to breakdown.and severe depression.

you talked about dependancy...i am dependant on certain limited services...but i dont think that is negative.if help,support and care enable us to live fuller,calmer and happier lives...then bring it on.perhaps we would need to self medicate less then.

please dont feel alone.you arent.

Ah the problem is... I used to be better.

I've asked professionals about this and they've said it's not uncommon as the weight of the years accumulate.

Also I think perhaps people who are more severely disabled may be less inclined to talk about it online. I know no-one IRL with autism...

hi harry, 5 years ago i had exactly the same problem as you. now i am spiritually stable & strong.

to quote chapter 10 of the dao de jing (beware of overglorified translations)... 

be creative & caring. be creative but not dominative. be free from dependence. flourish but don't force. this is called deep love.