Published on 12, July, 2020
Does this make any kind of sense to anyone?
For me, society seems to be present me with a choice
1. Act normal, uptight and be accepted on the surface, as a walk down the street, but feel depressed, isolated because I have internally obliterated some of the essential quirky parts of my character.
2. Relax, act a bit quirky, and have people avoid me in the street, and be treated like some kind of rapist, mad animal or wierd alien sub-species.
From my own perspective, it seems that people outside have this extra, unnecessary layer, that is like an armed militaristic assault vehicle designed to convince people of their social status - it makes them seem fake, uptight and often rather reactionary, even if they identify as progressive or left wing, because they can't see past their social conditioning needs, that they push in my face at every possible mimenf. If I try to conform to their behaviours of physical uptightness, pushing out my personality like some kind of armed militaristic assault vehicle then my body has to become extremely tense indeed, it's like I'm absorbing all their uptightness, and externally I seem to go to the extreme of their behaviour and often appear robotic or irritable or unreasonably idealistic.
So, that's my dilemma either become robotic or be treated like a potential alien-weirdo-rapist.
Sound familiar, or not?
WiredDifferently said:women typically, but not always, will react to the threat of the invading tribe, with an instinctive fear of rape.
Number said:Walking alone, in the countryside as a single male, does see me treated (in the first instance) as a rapist/murderer......in my experience.
Peter said:oh my sweet summer child. Guys get called a rapist just for looking 'funny' at a women these days.
I found reading these comments disturbing.
It's really a case of 'welcome to my world'.
I've tried very hard to keep myself safe all my life and that includes not walking anywhere alone which is isolated and especially after dark.
It actually ISN'T safe for women and I'm sorry if the repercussion of that is that you feel uncomfortable, but I can assure you it's much worse for us.
If I were walking alone somewhere that I was vulnerable and a single male came towards me (or even worse several) I would instinctively be on high alert, and with good cause.
Hi Debbie, I absolutely acknowledge and support the fact that you feel unsafe in the streets, and I feel dreadful that we live in such a world as this - but it is also true that men are often being labelled, as something vile, and that is as traumatising as feeling unsafe - imagine if everyone assumed you were another Lucy Letby, just because you happen to be a woman walking differently, looked at you with fear and crossed the road to get away from you...
I hope we can all support each other in the difficulties we experience in life, the last thing any of us wants is a war of accusations between the sexes - what both men and women say and experience can both be true, believing what one person says does not invalidate the other person's experience. We can both be believed, and I hope given some support, encouragement and advice to make the best of life in a difficult world.