Social fatigue

Thanks everyone. Yeah, I am thinking about the prospect of going part time, or looking for something different. I've already put in for a local school lab tech job and also an LRC post at the school I'm at, so they shouldn't be SO much interaction at least. I've actually only got till the end of this academic year till the end of my contract and it might not even be renewed. All I know is that I can't keep this up forever and I need to start making steps to change the situation now. But it is difficult to know what is best to do as often jobs are interaction-heavy, computer screen heavy, or manual handling, all of which I have my issues with!

Reading your post was like reading about my life. Im a learning assistant in a college and have been working in that sort of role in schools and colleges on and off for the last ten years. Ive just handed in my notice at work as I am so burned out I just cant do it anymore.

Not sure what advice to give but one thing I would say is I think there is a huge difference if you only work part time. I think the most draining thing for us is coming home from a day like that with all that social interaction and knowing we have to do it all again tomorrow. Thats what makes us shut down at the end of the day. Its a self preservation thing because subconciosly we know we have to recharge ourselves and do it all again tomorrow and we cant face that. Knowing when you come home from a day at work that you have a day off to recover at your own pace the next day might take some of the pressure off. Maybe you could go part time?

I much prefer walking - it helps me unwind. It’s great that yo7 can work from home - my husband did this during the pandemic and he much preferred it. 
I think there are jobs that really suit many autistic people - it’s just finding them. My eldest has really struggled with this - he has worked in many offices and found them pretty unbearable. 

I used to work in a school and was able to walk to get transport home. That helped me unwind. 

I now do office work but from home. However when I worked in the building I tried to go for a walk at lunchtime. 

This is why I work online with no human interaction. I don't think I could cope with people for multiple hours a day. Even if I like them that level of contact is too exhausting. Depressing too, as it feels like my self switches off when I'm around people, so as soon as it's over I feel like I don't even exist. Childhood was incredibly stressful due to the lack of solitude and all my breakdowns have been triggered by too much social contact.

I think you have to treat social energy as a finite resource. If you spend it on work, you won't be able to spend it elsewhere, and vice versa.

Is part time or a different job an option?

If I spend time with anyone (other than my close family) I get really exhausted by it. In such a  situation (which I haven’t had to do for ages due to the pandemic)  I’m working so hard at trying to be around people and not screw up in some way that I’m in a sort of ‘high alert’ state and it’s very tense and a real strain - so once I get home I’m just exhausted and I kind of shut down. I just need comfort and quiet to recover. 

Maybe you need to make sure you can build in recovery time into your day/week? In a structured way? 
or could you reduce your hours possibly if you feel it’s becoming too much? 
I think working as a learning assistant in a school is a wonderful and valuable contribution to make - as an autistic person you must have great insights into some of the challenges your pupils are dealing with. So I hope you can find a way to make this work for you if you enjoy the job. 

I’m sure your boyfriend and family will understand if you discuss it with them. Maybe in time you’ll find things improve as you become more relaxed and comfortable in your job? 

Best of luck :)