This is a root and branch (pardon the pun), fresh-start, clean slate thread...and continuation of the Are there any women here? post
Mw too. ()!
To Disallowed Cynosure and Spotty Tortoise.
Thank you for your company tonight and as you two just happen be here right now please accept my final offer of a hug as I really ought to get a bit of sleep ready for a long day tomorrow back at work.
take care night owls,
Sleep well Lone. ()x
Um... given what was just written... out of courtesy I should say that I was leaving off as well... life is not predictable in all directions... and also that I am grateful for offered companionship. This is weird and unusual for myself. I still do not like the Internet, however. And I do not go straight to bed, and instead try to play Pokemon, late at nights...
Thank You SpottyTortoise and LoneWarrior in any case, just now, and Grand Fortune to yourselves.
Grsnd fortune to you too DC, no idea about Pokemon but have fun. ()
Hello Spotty Tortoise, nice to see you here. Since I realised about the asd I have felt huge relief at not 'needing' to beat myself up about who I am. Not lazy, thick, rude etc after all! I have almost completely stopped doing the things that I struggled to cope with - coffee mornings, evening classes, craft groups etc. (I am in the fortunate position of not being at work). I do miss doing creative work with other people but on balance I am so much happier just drifting through, just me and my other half. I haven't spoken to anyone other than him about being autistic. I think quite a few people had worked it out before I did! I do see family and love seeing the children (lots of them in the extended family) but it's never for long and I can back out if I need to. I really hope this doesn't all sound complacent or smug, because I'm not. But like you I don't behave any differently when I am with other people - the habits of a lifetime, I suppose.
I hope you're feeling less down today()
No relationships here; and I have loads of "superficial friends". But I always end up with people being angry with me (even though I so do my best). And when people are angry I almost feel as if someone is holding me hostage - and I can't function until that person has "forgiven" me. Even though I know I am not at fault. I end up sending lots of messages trying to justify why I can't meet up, and I feel they don't get it and I feel their annoyance.
I also feel sad because often people come with their issues to me. But when I feel bad, often people don't like ask extra questions and just say okay, and then I feel I have to stop. And the conversation just turns back to them - and I go back into the mode of asking people the right questions. Often I feel that ASD friends are more sensitive and empathetic.
I would be interested to know how the other person experiences it. They seem to like this kind of interaction. They keep going for more than an hour sometimes. I kind of like it, because it is interesting. But it is very tiring. I often feel I need to justify my existence (why I am not at work, why I have no energy, etc) - even when people don't say it bluntly - and many people do, because they don't understand why I'm not back at work. I don't tell everyone about ASD, I sometimes say burn-out (but that has been like 4 years now) and I do have a Lyme infection and CFS/etc kind of symptoms (I think many people with ASD seem prone to this).I often wish I had known what I know about myself now, 30 years ago.... I might have had a hope and a chance at fun relationships and my own family. O gosh I hope I don't sound too mopey and depressed, but then again, maybe that is how I'm feeling now.
I don’t identify as a men, even though I’ve got a male body, I don’t particularly identify as a woman either. Where am I?
I have got a male body and I love it. I have always got on better with women than men.
So you’re a YOU!