Published on 12, July, 2020
What are your experiences with dating and do you find it difficult to maintain a relationship? I find communication hard sometimes and can come across cold.
I think it's fair to say i struggle with all aspects of dating and relationships! Looking back at my previous experiences it makes a lot more sense now i know more about Asperger's. I've not dated anyone since i self-diagnosed and i haven't really thought about doing so due to all the bad experiences i've had.
But Evan makes an interesting point there about when to mention it. It's a tricky one. Ideally i think i would mention it straight away because i tend to make a poor first impression, but then maybe that would make the other person uncomfortable. I don't know.
ProtectorOfTheSmall said:
I've not dated anyone since i self-diagnosed and i haven't really thought about doing so due to all the bad experiences i've had.
An interesting point.... I have gone through a series of failed and some nasty relationships...and am considering throwing in the towel in terms of any future relationships. Was this to protect yourself, or others? Or just emotionally worn out and bruised by it all? You don’t have to answer that...it can remain rhetorical...
i need the company of others, I am enjoying my time so far here as I am able to express myself...but don’t think I’m good enough to be someone’s partner... too many flaws and Aspie traits. I’m just trying to work my own self out at the moment.
I just find relationships really tiring. I feel like it takes up too much of my brain to maintain them and i can't concentrate on everything at once. And break-ups take me a long time to recover from.
I also definitely miss the big picture. I also have trouble picking up when I've upset someone or made them annoyed if they are trying to hide it. And then by the time they finally lose their temper it seems to have come out of nowhere to me. So the shock and confusion play a part in me not finding the right words (or sometimes any words).
I am the same.
Yes, I am always extremely loyal and loving inside. Probably, I do not show the love and others do not see it.
TheTalentedMute said:I also find with any relationship you decide what you need and hold dear and what you can live with... it is called "compromise" - maybe some things are just non-negotiable!
I like what you wrote here. Completely agree with you.
Yes, I am remarkably good at attending to detail.
It is often difficult for me understanding the overall picture.
Yes, I stress about each individual fallout and upset and cant see the bigger picture.
TheTalentedMute said:But it does not mean that we don't care, cant love, and be exceptionally lovely people :)
Completely agree with you!