Published on 12, July, 2020
hi everyone! i’m looking for some advice. i’m 20 years old. i’ve thought for some time now that i have autism. i’ve got a long list of how i acted as a child and how i act now. i phoned my gp a couple times and even had an appointment to discuss this. as usual, i was turned away from a diagnosis and told to seek help elsewhere, specifically here. i believe a diagnosis would really help me and stop my constant questioning of myself. i was always the ‘well-behaved smart girl’ in school, and i am currently doing well in university, which is why i think no one has taken me seriously. the reality is, i have struggled so much with what i’ve discovered is called ‘masking’. i never realised that neurotypical people don’t do this? it’s so very mentally and physically draining for me, but because it doesn’t affect anyone around me it feels as though i should be doing fine. but i’m really not. it’s so stressful, i really don’t know what to do next. am i going to live like this for the rest of my life?
Absolutely, there's a lot of prejudice against women too - I would take the ASQ test and print off the result, then print off info on how ASD is often not recognised in women and try again. Also approach the university for support. This is an example of good practice for HE: https://www.plymouth.ac.uk/uploads/production/document/path/10/10865/Best_Practice_Guide_03_screen.pdf - ask your university if they have such a policy. Under current law, you don't need a diagnosis to access support for a hidden disability.
Take the AQ: https://psychology-tools.com/test/autism-spectrum-quotient
Read this: https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/diagnosis/pre-diagnosis/adults
Read this and print it off for your GP: https://www.healthline.com/health/autism-in-women
Check whether self-referral is an option with your local NHS Autism Services
Good luck! And in the meantime feel free to make friends and find support here.
I agree with the other members. Try to relax, easier said than done I know... But do try to relax and don't try to be like others, just be yourself because. When I was at school I spent so much time trying to be like the other girls who I thought were better than me. I wasted so much time. Now I'm happy being myself and I do feel better feeling this way.
Honestly everytime I hear some report an attitude like that from their GP, I feel like screaming.
It isn't because you do a good job of appearing to be ok that your needs should be ignored. That's a dangerous attitude. We appear to cope until we just can't. But they could prevent you reaching that point ever by giving you the assessment and empowering you to get that bit support to make life easier.
You do have some other options. While you are a student the university might help you get to an assessment. Alternatively, you could speak to another GP.
Once you come to terms with a Diagnosis or Autism etc, you will naturally relax a bit because it will be a weight off your shoulders. It will be a new journey of getting to know and accept yourself :-)
Have you figured out how to do the relaxing part? I'm curious and very interested as I know that I definitely need to relax more but just seem unable to do the "relaxing"...
Autism is an exclusive club. It is PART of you, it,s our reality. My advice would be DONT compare yourself to other people.Get to know yourself and.........RELAX ....
Hi! As NAS78875 suggested, it might be worth asking your university if they can give you some advice or a preliminary assessment. I know that my university did this, though at the time I had no idea that I am probably autistic. I am currently waiting to be assessed as I strongly suspect that I am autistic. I wish I had realised earlier. I can relate to what you are saying. I also did well academically at school and university but some things were a real struggle... and masking is so exhausting. I am not sure what it is like in the UK, but it might also be worth seeing if there are any autistic societies or advice services in your area. I am currently in Germany and I am receiving very good support and advice from a free advice service specifically for autistic people. They even wrote a letter for my doctor explaining why I should be assessed and gave me some tips to better cope in the meantime. For me, realising that I am autistic was a huge revelation and it has been extremely helpful- it allowed me to better understand my struggles and recognise some of my patterns. So I think you've already made the first step towards better dealing with everything! I hope you manage to get an assessment.
HiHave you looked at referral options for your area? I am similar (very academic, done well etc) and have been able to self refer for a diganosis. Waiting to hear if I am on the waiting list but it has helped to do soemthing about it. You may also be able to ask your university if they offer assessments... you never know.