Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone!
I am new to the website and I'm looking for some advice or even anyone who just understands and is struggling through the same thing.
I have just started a masters degree at university, moved away from home into a studio apartment in my universities student accommodation and have been trying to adapt on my own.
The university hasn't given us a timetable yet and everything starts in less than a week! I am really struggling with the lack of structure and not knowing what is happening around me. I can't plan for anything and set out my assignment schedule or lecture schedule or anything as I haven't had anything yet. Normally I would sort all of this out straight away so that I can ease myself into a new schedule and plan before having to find a new job and make new friends. I can't do that this time.
I need to get a job desperately, but I feel so anxious going to ask for hours of work when I don't even know when I can work yet! It seems absurd to me and I just think I'll be laughed at. It's hard enough to start a new job, meet new people and navigate a new city without having to worry about anything else.
I also don't know how I'm going to keep up with lectures and assignments this year. Normally what motivates me is being out of the comfort of my home/ room and working in a "working" environment, such as a library or classroom. I can't do that this year. I have to do it all from my studio apartment and I'm already struggling to separate my time from work and pleasure, so to speak. I find myself watching more tv episodes and reading than I do the work I'm actually meant to be doing. My room and my home are for chilling and relaxing and I just can't find a way to separate them during this time and actually motivate myself to work.
Does anyone have any advice or tips on how to be less anxious without a schedule and how to motivate yourself to work at home without getting distracted? Or how to go about finding a new job without knowing your timetable? I would really appreciate any kind of advice as I'm really struggling at the moment!
Thank you!!!
Thanks Charlotte you too :)
The basics of what they are offering me are study skills support meetings once a week and then mentoring to check on my mental health fortnightly. Beyond that, it is supposed to be putting things up in advance so I don't freak out like I have been doing. I don't know if they will offer you any different but that's basically all I've got at the moment. I hope you can work out how to get some from your uni and I will definitely be chasing up mine over the next few days! I'll let you know what they say if I can. Good luck!!!!
Yeah, I can see the challenge.
I think if I were in this position, I'd try to email the lecturer (when that becomes possible) and ask if each person could share a paragraph or two about themselves by way of introduction, a bit like sometimes happens in some classes and tutor groups in usual circumstances.
Wishing you the best.
You are absolutely not alone and I would be so!!! grateful if you could keep me up to date with what provisions they put in place to support you and how you are finding it all. This is all so new to me too having only recently learnt of my diagnosis 15 days ago I feel complete overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings. Many of which are making me feel deeply alone in this all.
I have basically been asking for information ahead of time where possible but am finding that my tutors seem overwhelmed too to be honest which makes me feel worse. As I feel I can't keep "pestering them with my troubles.
I had a total melt down today during a video tutorial because they changed the time of our second class on a whim and I missed that so ended up joining late and was totally lost.
That's one of my goals for this starting semester, to meet someone who can keep me on track and vice versa for them. It's just so much harder doing that when I'm not actually meeting a single person face-to-face for this semester. Hopefully, I can manage to navigate meeting someone online though.
Thank you
It's so frustrating, isn't it?!!!! I have been offered assistance but they have to wait for my timetable so they can also plan around it, as they will be setting up weekly/ fortnightly meetings to check-in at the same time every week. So annoying.
If it goes on much longer I'm going to see if I can find a lecturers email or something, which is anxiety-inducing on its own as I've never met any of them.
It is comforting to know I'm not alone experiencing this though
Hi Charlotte,
I feel exactly the same! I started university last week and have been thrown head long into my first group assignment with no timetable. I am not being provided lecture notes or reading ahead of classes. I have tutor lead days 3x per week and have missed one day a week due to getting upset and overwhelmed. This has been a direct result of not getting the support I needed despite asking for a number of reasonable allowances to be made ahead of time. In addition to all this I am also extremely new to considering myself a person with Autism as I only received my ASD diagnosis 15 days ago when I also was diagnosed with Dyslexia and Dyscalculia. As a mature student I have been in work for a number of years which only adds to my anxiety as I know many of my peers have continued on from previous courses so are already in the correct mindset for Uni life.
Can I ask whether you are receiving any learning support? Has anyone been in touch to offer in class assistance etc?
:)
My best thought of the coping with the work aspect is, maybe try as hard as you can bear to find a couple of work buddies. There will likely be other Aspies or near-Aspies in your class.
It might help to contact a lecturer or support at the Uni to help you to connect with other students in you class.
The part here is that having a work buddy will mean you have someone else (one or two others) as a benchmark.
If you notice you're behind a bit, compared to the work buddy, your own psychology will probably help you to catch back up a bit.
You'll also have someone to ask questions [push yourself to ask those questions if you can] to and help each other out.
Also, if both you and you buddy fall behind, you can both support each other and work together to get the support you might both need.
I guess the thing is, is to challenge yourself to reach out. Reach out like your life kind of depends on it.
That's my thoughts on this part.