Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone!
I am new to the website and I'm looking for some advice or even anyone who just understands and is struggling through the same thing.
I have just started a masters degree at university, moved away from home into a studio apartment in my universities student accommodation and have been trying to adapt on my own.
The university hasn't given us a timetable yet and everything starts in less than a week! I am really struggling with the lack of structure and not knowing what is happening around me. I can't plan for anything and set out my assignment schedule or lecture schedule or anything as I haven't had anything yet. Normally I would sort all of this out straight away so that I can ease myself into a new schedule and plan before having to find a new job and make new friends. I can't do that this time.
I need to get a job desperately, but I feel so anxious going to ask for hours of work when I don't even know when I can work yet! It seems absurd to me and I just think I'll be laughed at. It's hard enough to start a new job, meet new people and navigate a new city without having to worry about anything else.
I also don't know how I'm going to keep up with lectures and assignments this year. Normally what motivates me is being out of the comfort of my home/ room and working in a "working" environment, such as a library or classroom. I can't do that this year. I have to do it all from my studio apartment and I'm already struggling to separate my time from work and pleasure, so to speak. I find myself watching more tv episodes and reading than I do the work I'm actually meant to be doing. My room and my home are for chilling and relaxing and I just can't find a way to separate them during this time and actually motivate myself to work.
Does anyone have any advice or tips on how to be less anxious without a schedule and how to motivate yourself to work at home without getting distracted? Or how to go about finding a new job without knowing your timetable? I would really appreciate any kind of advice as I'm really struggling at the moment!
Thank you!!!
My best thought of the coping with the work aspect is, maybe try as hard as you can bear to find a couple of work buddies. There will likely be other Aspies or near-Aspies in your class.
It might help to contact a lecturer or support at the Uni to help you to connect with other students in you class.
The part here is that having a work buddy will mean you have someone else (one or two others) as a benchmark.
If you notice you're behind a bit, compared to the work buddy, your own psychology will probably help you to catch back up a bit.
You'll also have someone to ask questions [push yourself to ask those questions if you can] to and help each other out.
Also, if both you and you buddy fall behind, you can both support each other and work together to get the support you might both need.
I guess the thing is, is to challenge yourself to reach out. Reach out like your life kind of depends on it.
That's my thoughts on this part.
That's one of my goals for this starting semester, to meet someone who can keep me on track and vice versa for them. It's just so much harder doing that when I'm not actually meeting a single person face-to-face for this semester. Hopefully, I can manage to navigate meeting someone online though.
Thank you
Yeah, I can see the challenge.
I think if I were in this position, I'd try to email the lecturer (when that becomes possible) and ask if each person could share a paragraph or two about themselves by way of introduction, a bit like sometimes happens in some classes and tutor groups in usual circumstances.
Wishing you the best.