Introduction

Hi There, welcome to the forum. Was there anything in particular that triggered the intense period of social isolation?

Hello Kitsun. Thankyou for your welcome! How are you?  I'm going to copy and paste from a reply i gave above so i can answer your question more easily. I hope that you don't mind.  Here it is:

"I know the hermits life well as it's the way i have spent most (but not all) of my adult life.  This particular period of hermitude has been so long that i'm not even sure what year i started it. I suspect it was 2014. Preceding this current period was my longest period of trying to make it in the outside world. Which lasted  3 years from 2011-2014.  When attempting to be social i find the various and subtle forms of rejection deeply hurtful and mentally scarring. It doesn't have to be outright rejection.  Sometimes the subtler rejection of always receiving a low place in an established pecking order/hierarchy can be even more wounding. Things like everyone pairing off whilst you remain single"

I’m good thank you. How are you today? 

I’ve done the hermit thing myself in the past so I know what it’s like. I’ve been on a mission to learn social skills the past several months which has stopped me from being so hermit like, I was only diagnosed at the end of last year so after realising that I had AS I realised where my deficit was and why I have always struggled to make/keep friends, so I decided to do something about it. I find that I get rejected less and people react better to me since I’ve been practicing the social skills that I’ve learned. When we’re you diagnosed? Have you had any support with managing your ASD?

That’s ok. You’re welcome. How are you doing today?

Fair enough re your thoughts on medication/mental health services. At least you know where the resources are if you ever need them. Apparently mind do an online service if you ever need support but don’t feel able to talk to someone face to face.

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

With Regards to whether the time on your own should go on forever, I guess it’s a case of weighing up the pros and cons and maybe finding a balance and whatever it is that you decide to do, doing when you’re ready. So personally I can do 2/3 days a week meeting friends for a couple of hours but any more just gets too exhausting, the remaining 4/5 days I’m spending on my own thank you very much, that’s my balance, but different things work for different people. 

I think you should start the thread ‘how to be a happy autistic?’ I’m sure many people on here would be willing go give you their opinion.

Why don’t you make a bullet point list of your own capabilities and capacities? You could make a project of it  

Hi. Thankyou for your long responses and taking the time to care.

Regarding Mental Health treatment: I feel i don't get on with the many different medicines i have tried and i despise the side effects. I am also not comfortable with thought of formal counselling.  Just having to be in same place once a week would be a stress and a burden to me.  Why i've never learnt to drive. I saw the crisis team in 2016 and they removed the metaphorical gun i had pointed at my dome and toddled off on their way. As is their function.

The time on my own has lasted around 5 years now.  It CAN go on forever but the question is should it? I nearly started another thread yesterday entitled "How to be a happy Autistic" asking for peoples tips.  I can muddle through alright. Sitting by myself obsessing over Pharoah Sanders Jazz albums or whatever my latest interest is.  Life can be so much more. Although i suspect many Autistic's also live the way i do. But not all. I wish i had a bullet point list setting out my own capabilities and capacity sometimes. That would be useful. So at least i'd know that any efforts that i undertook had a potential win at the end of them.  And were not just putting an unnecessary extra burden on my already fragile state,

Hi. Thankyou for your long responses and taking the time to care.

Regarding Mental Health treatment: I feel i don't get on with the many different medicines i have tried and i despise the side effects. I am also not comfortable with thought of formal counselling.  Just having to be in same place once a week would be a stress and a burden to me.  Why i've never learnt to drive. I saw the crisis team in 2016 and they removed the metaphorical gun i had pointed at my dome and toddled off on their way. As is their function.

The time on my own has lasted around 5 years now.  It CAN go on forever but the question is should it? I nearly started another thread yesterday entitled "How to be a happy Autistic" asking for peoples tips.  I can muddle through alright. Sitting by myself obsessing over Pharoah Sanders Jazz albums or whatever my latest interest is.  Life can be so much more. Although i suspect many Autistic's also live the way i do. But not all. I wish i had a bullet point list setting out my own capabilities and capacity sometimes. That would be useful. So at least i'd know that any efforts that i undertook had a potential win at the end of them.  And were not just putting an unnecessary extra burden on my already fragile state,

That’s ok. You’re welcome. How are you doing today?

Fair enough re your thoughts on medication/mental health services. At least you know where the resources are if you ever need them. Apparently mind do an online service if you ever need support but don’t feel able to talk to someone face to face.

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

With Regards to whether the time on your own should go on forever, I guess it’s a case of weighing up the pros and cons and maybe finding a balance and whatever it is that you decide to do, doing when you’re ready. So personally I can do 2/3 days a week meeting friends for a couple of hours but any more just gets too exhausting, the remaining 4/5 days I’m spending on my own thank you very much, that’s my balance, but different things work for different people. 

I think you should start the thread ‘how to be a happy autistic?’ I’m sure many people on here would be willing go give you their opinion.

Why don’t you make a bullet point list of your own capabilities and capacities? You could make a project of it