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Do people actually like doing hobbies etc., or is it all for show?

BeaE

I have tried various hobbies over the years, but it always just feels like I'm filling time, or forcing myself into doing things that society approves of. I've not actually liked doing any of the things.

The tiredness or anxiety caused by hobbies and 'fun' pursuits just doesn't seem worth it. Quiet crafty hobbies or reading generally just feel like filling time, and then I feel bad for not being out and about, or bad for not finishing a project I've bought things for and not finished (or even started...)

For as long as I can remember, I've devoted most of my energy to work or study. Maybe this is why hobbies are less appealing to me - 'living to work' not 'working to live' and all that.

I'm wondering if other people feel like this too, or if you actually have found things that are enjoyable and fulfilling? If I just keep trying with a hobby, will enjoyment for it arise at some point? Maybe I just don't know I'm enjoying things, like alexithymia? 

Any input would be great please, just trying to figure this out!

  • I am surprised by your post as I mistakenly assumed everyone had hobbies they enjoyed, clearly for you this is not the case. 

    I don’t experience the “live to work” thing you described and infact assumed that people who lived this way had a deep hole in their core, certainly the people I met in my working life with this approach were compensating for something, often love or validation or self esteem, and never appeared happy or content. But again I may be wrong. 

    I have many hobbies I deeply enjoy, many relating to collecting, reading, learning for its own sake, being creative with words, being with my cats, organising and sorting and tidying, even doing the dishes Joy cat

  • So photography has been my biggest passion for a long time. When i started it was purely for fun, i was obsessed with it. Then as i got better i got more serious about it. Then i tried to turn into a business…thats when the enjoyment started to fade as i was obsessing over technical perfection, eventually it just fizzled away for a good few years. Now i’m enjoying it again, but just for fun. I have no intention of making money on it. Not every hobby has to eventually turn into a money making thing. 

  • I like going hobbies, I see what you mean though I sometimes go through a phrase where certain hobbies don't give me enjoyment - I put that down to needing a break from them - then later I'll find I enjoy doing the ones I took a break from

    For example I was really into reading when I was young, then I had a time of about a year where I still read but not much and didn't really enjoy but then I started to enjoy and l can read more books now in a timeframe