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Do people actually like doing hobbies etc., or is it all for show?

BeaE

I have tried various hobbies over the years, but it always just feels like I'm filling time, or forcing myself into doing things that society approves of. I've not actually liked doing any of the things.

The tiredness or anxiety caused by hobbies and 'fun' pursuits just doesn't seem worth it. Quiet crafty hobbies or reading generally just feel like filling time, and then I feel bad for not being out and about, or bad for not finishing a project I've bought things for and not finished (or even started...)

For as long as I can remember, I've devoted most of my energy to work or study. Maybe this is why hobbies are less appealing to me - 'living to work' not 'working to live' and all that.

I'm wondering if other people feel like this too, or if you actually have found things that are enjoyable and fulfilling? If I just keep trying with a hobby, will enjoyment for it arise at some point? Maybe I just don't know I'm enjoying things, like alexithymia? 

Any input would be great please, just trying to figure this out!

Parents

  • Hi BeaE 

    Totally get what you mean. Thanks for sharing! 

    It's so difficult to have a hobby as it's so exhausting being at work, living in a neurotypical world and looking after yourself. 

    After a day at work I need a lie down in a dark room for hours. Haven't been able to start or maintain any hobbies sadly. I did some mindfulness online for a while which was good. It's so difficult. 

    I have no idea how people have time for anything outside of work and surviving it. 

    Although I think the key is not giving everything to work. Do a good job but you can do that giving 70 to 80% . I'm just figuring this out. Not everyone gives 100% at work and that's fine and great. 

    Maybe, in giving less to work, there is more left for other things. If you want to do a hobby. Or for other stuff. 

    Hope that helps. 

    Keep us posted on how you get on Slight smile

  • in reply to ALM
    ALM said:
    Do a good job but you can do that giving 70 to 80%

    Yes, I found that too, when I was working. You need to have a separate part of life to maintain mental well being.

  • in reply to Marianne72

    Yes and I think that's best managed in morning times when mind is clearer and less tired. Writing down progress makes health clearer and more tangible going forward, 

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