Hi,I'm male, 39, I was diagnosed two years ago and as such I'm looking for two years for some external help about managing my autistic spectrumwithout solution.
I would say that my autism is mild, and as such I would say the main things are ok but I still have some rough corners
I'm in france, and in a medical desert. As such as far as I know there is zero chance that I will find some counseling or similar and I haveto take care of my self on finding what will help myself to suffer less/feel better.
I have several problems, but I would say the three majors ones are anxiety ,irritability and uncontrollable burst of angriness, and lacks of social skills.
I have succeed in managing my anxiety but one part of this management was stopping my work as a computer engineer, and as far as I know,in the current state of anxiety level, I'm unable to fulfill a new job. I have revenue from french medicare (sécurité sociale) and as such I don'tneed a job to survive. I really love computers and would enjoy to do the technical part of my computer job, if possible despite that it impliesmore social interaction than in my ideal way of life. (And of course, additional revenue is always welcome, but additional revenue is all but a priority)
I already read "Asperger's syndrome" book from Tony Attwood (french third edition) two years ago and somehow it helped. I also read quite a lotof testimony of people on the spectrum and that helped too.
What I'm looking for is solid advice and reference of what says expert about the way for someone on the spectrum to learn how to manage my autism by himself.A book form would be perfect but any form is ok. Personal advice and testimony or anything which you think can help is welcome.If possible start your answers by something like "reference book:" that I know what I have to expect from your answer. (If you don't do it because of personal choiceit is not a problem)--Computer lover
I've read a book called Gut and Psychology Syndrome by Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride. On the cover it is written: "Natural treatment for Autism, Dyspraxia, A.D.D, Dyslexia, A.D.H.D, Depression, Schizophrenia."
The book is about how a diet can help manage depression and anxiety for people with Autism. The woman who wrote it claims that it helped her daughter who herself has Autism. I personally have found it helpful even though I'm not yet fully following the book's advice. I'm gradually eating more and more like the book recommends, and each step I get closer to what the book says, I have less anxiety and can socialise a bit better.
The book also recommends people immediately start taking probiotics such as kefir and sauerkraut. I've found these very helpful too. I make my own water kefir at home and drink sauerkraut juice I buy from a shop. These seem to be helping me. When I've cut out sugar, which the book recommends too, I also seem to feel a lot more able to cope.
There are stages recommended in the book. In the beginning it advises you to avoid even fruit and even starches like potatoes and rice. However I've not yet committed myself to doing that, I still eat both those, but I am thinking about trying to eliminate them for a while soon, as I do seem to notice I get more tired, anxious and frustrated after I have starches and struggling more to hold my attention on something and feel emotionally stable after eating fruit.
This is just one person's opinion. Take it with a grain of salt.
Thanks a lot of this feedback.
As far as I know, I'm afraid Natasha Campbell-McBirde is just a one more quackery which is around autism, using the call to nature without evidence beyond her own testimony that her method work. ( For example, see http://americanloons.blogspot.com/2013/05/556-natasha-campbell-mcbride.html ) If you feel good with your current diet following your advice, there is no reason to change it, it is perfectly ok. I'm quite certain, that eating more and more, not to the point to weight problems, is a very good advice to follow to being healthy and as such it should help to cope with anxiety and socialize.Just take care about the good looking advice around autism you might encounter, a lot have not solid ground, and following them will just make you lose time by making you trying inefficient things. At the opposite, Tony Attwood I quoted, is one of the best specialist of autism who rely on very solid scientific studies and give real solution even if there is no magic. (And as far as I know, there is no magic recipe such as the ones promoted by Natasha Campbell-McBride, to cure autism, if one would exist, it would probably known for a long).Take care, and thanks a lot again for giving me your feedback.
Improve your Social Skills by Daniel Wendler is useful for social skills advice. He has Autism himself. It gives tips on ways to communicate with people and how to ask questions and what kind of questions. And how to inspire other people to talk more.
I've tried some of it but have not got the energy at the moment to read it all or remember it all. I know someone else on here who has found it very useful for them and they're a lot better than me at talking to people.
Thanks that looks like a solid advice.
Computer lover said:"reference book:"
Hi, just read your post and couldn't run. So much of what you are saying is so familiar and quite common on this forum. I was diagnosed quite a while ago, and first heard of Asperger in relation to my daughter. I started with Tony Attwood too. It really helped me initially to make sense of the condition, as the list of descriptors on the tic-box page were not making any sense, like 'plays with Ninja Turtles'... lol, my daughter played with dolls.
I used to read a lot of books on autism and I a sorry to say after a while got saturated, as none of them really helped in any way beyond being able to make sense, relate to the condition and review my life experience in the light of new knowledge. I just realised that Asperger was the thing that was happening to me and things started to make sense again. I know i sounds strange.
On social skills, surprisingly, I didn't find any of the advice helpful as the problem, as you probably realised, is not knowing what to do, but actually doing it However I definitely moved on from this debate now. So my bit of reference advice for you is twofold:
First, your communication and ability to connect stems from your internal psycho-biological state, your anxiety gets in the way when it's high and no amount of 'try harder' would make anything but aggravate the situation. That's my experience. What you need is to relax, quite physically being relaxed and zen in your body and mind and the right words and moves would somehow follow. Another thing that helps is to communicate for a purpose, in a way that makes sense to you, you , I mean an Aspie is more relaxed this way and things happen.
Second, I discovered something new and profound for me in the past few months. I had a course at university about the channels on which you communicate, but didn't make much of it then. Recently it clicked. If you read through this forum or another 'balanced ' autism forum you would find an incredible supportive community, and incredible empathy, and social skills. a lot of jokes and laughter, a lot of very similar stories you can relate to. Autistic people connect with each-other on autism forums and in my opinion it is the best way to find a community and to start interacting. If you scroll through pages here you would find a treasure trove of 'reference advice' , a lot of moving accounts and hopefully some new friends. One of the things I found helpful is to make a positive image of your autism and the advice and people here are the best support.
Finally, actually we formed a new charity to create a peer to peer support community an we are embarking on an exciting new adventure. Incidentally, we need a computer programmer. We are a group of autistic people who came together right here on this forum. So if you feel you would like to explore this, PM [personal message] me and we will start talking.
thanks a lot for your answer, it definitely helps.
YouTube videos: Purple Ella. Check out her channel - she shares great, practical advice on living life as an adult on the spectrum. She also makes videos for friends and relatives, so they might be worth showing to the people who are close to you (if you feel comfortable doing so).