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Working is killing me

Starbuck

We all get tired and stressed from work and we all definitely have our bad days and even bad jobs, but I am finding as time goes on I am coping less and less with work.

I have recently moved jobs due to numerous issues at my last place of work, but I am finding that I am constantly run down, fatigued, stressed and just generally feel unwell as a result of working.  I am in my early thirties and I know we slow down and get tired with age, but I feel ill - not just tired.

My mental health is strained, I am suffering with anxiety and possibly depression, GI issues, skin complaints, respiratory problems, migraines, fatigue, muscles cramps/pain, joint pain, general illnesses etc etc.

Packing my job in is not an option as I have bills to pay, but I also want to work and like having purpose and responsibility - I just wish it didn't take so much out of me.

I have been looking at career changes, but at the moment I cannot financially afford the risks and even then I am not really sure what I could do that would alleviate these health issues.

Most people seem to breeze through life (ok slightly over dramatic) and get a weeks work done without a hitch and then make the most of the weekend.  I spend my weekends and evenings a wreck, just trying to recover to start again.  Are other people like this and just hide it better or is it me?

If I have to work until my late 60s until I retire, I am starting to think I won't make it anywhere near retirement at this rate.

  • in reply to .

    Hi Ellie,

    Good to hear from you - I have been quiet lately on the forums as I just don't have the energy to respond in the evenings or weekends.  I am diagnosed and my employer is aware as well.  I have had a couple of shutdowns which has worried them a bit, but I don't think they know how to approach the whole subject of reasonable adjustments.  I have flagged some concerns I have in relation to future business developments, but I am waiting on the outcomes from that.  My boss is reluctant to talk about the subject for whatever reason and we both struggle to communicate so it is difficult.

    I feel things are far more overly complicated than they need to be in the workplace sometimes and I feel this all the more when I am burnout and my patience is wearing.

    All the best Ellie.

  • in reply to DongFeng5

    Hi DongFeng5 - I have visited my GP and a number of tests have been done.  Everything seems fine and I am just waiting on a result of an EEG, but I am pretty confident that will be ok too.

  • Hello there,

    As soon as I saw the title of this I just had to reply - it sounds so alarmingly familiar to the situation I found myself in two years ago. I am 27 years old now and I have left work to pursue postgraduate qualifications, and I am much happier. I understand this may not be feasible and/or desirable for you, but I have a few suggestions which might help.

    I think you can distill your options down to two: make this job more bearable, or make steps to find one which works better for you. I have compiled a few suggestions of things I did but am happy to suggest more if you need it.

    1. As with many on here, I think it is worth telling your employer if you are on the spectrum. You may not have a formal diagnosis, and this may or may not be something you wish to pursue if you haven't. But definitely communicate with them, even if you say that you are self-diagnosed.

    2. Ask for a referral to Occupational Health. 

    3. If you are diagnosed with any conditions, your employer is obliged to help you make reasonable adjustments to your environment of work under the Equality Act of 2010. Now, their understanding of 'reasonable' is based on interpretation, but there might be a few things you could ask for:

    - to use headphones to block out noise

    - ability to use a different room for complicated tasks (depending on the job, of course, but for instance I used to write my minutes in an isolated room)

    - ability to use tinted glasses/ sunglasses to reduce sensory input

    - access to a work wellbeing programme, if they have one

    - suggestions of a quieter, accessible place to spend your lunch

    As far as possible I would suggest making requests in writing and keeping a good paper trail if you can.

    I appreciate these things may not get you out of your situation, but perhaps they can reduce some of the anxiety and overload feelings you experience at your workplace. 

    I am so sorry that you feel this way and you have my sympathy as work very nearly led to me experiencing a breakdown a couple of years ago. I wish you the best and hope you keep us posted as to your progress.

  • Sorry to hear that you're struggling with work; you are definitely not alone in finding employment difficult. The closest I got to working full time was doing 25hours a week and that caused me to be very unwell mentally and physically. I had to stop working in the end and am currently volunteering and receiving ESA benefit.

    I agree with Dongfeng, it sounds like you could really use some help in improving your health. If you are on the spectrum, telling your employers can be a good move; they may be able to find ways to make things less stressful and demanding for you like Elephant says.

    I really sympathise with your situation, hope things get better for you.

  • Hi Starbuck

    Firstly, are you diagnosed as on the spectrum? Secondly, does you employer and to that effect is there scope for you to request reasonable adjustments at work?  Have you been able to identify what the issues are that are causing you distress and what could/needs to be done to mitigate these?

    Functioning  in terms of jumping the hoops of employment and the responsibilities of paying the bills etc is a stress for many,but putting ASC in the mix can make the experience even more mentally and emotionally demanding (as well as extremely tiring).

    best wishes to you

    Ellie

  • Change jobs to one with fewer responsibilities. It'll mean a salary reduction, but health is priceless.