Feeling Guilt for autistic accommodations.

If it was a Catholic church, it wasn't wine they were drinking, nor a biscuit (called a host) it was the body,blood, soul and divinity of Jesus. 

Bread has a wider definition than you imagine - it is in the western church unleavened bread (in the east they use leaven bread so more like what you'd think is bread). The bread is like that - compact - so the particles are less likely to fall apart, so a stronger binding, no yeast and finer flour - but definitely bread. 

It's good the values have stayed with you. As for patience, it's like all things, practice makes perfect. Also you are unable to practice patience (a fruit of the Holy Spirit) without God helping you, so ask for help. 

Practising patience for patients. I wish I had more of these skills, I went to a Christian school and the values have definitely stayed with me. Church at the end of every school term and the little biscuit style bread always threw me because I thought “that’s not bread” and why is that kid drinking wine. 

I have difficulties differentiating between the virtues of making allowances for bad time keeping and not being a pushover.

I would struggle particularly when an event runs on past the finish time. There are times in the past when a person or persons in my company would say I was making a big deal over the time running on, yet at other times, they would have complained about the timing to management. I can’t for the life of me understand the difference between some of the situations.

I learned to quietly exit the situation if I could, or else suffer in silence. Nowadays, I can suit myself without it affecting others, but I still can’t understand when bad time keeping is acceptable and when it isn’t.

I think when it’s so new and raw the diagnosis it’s about finding what suits you best. You are still discovering exactly what your needs are and how life can be made to accommodate those needs. I think for me personally I will just up and leave and the main people in my life have kinda gotten used to it. In the work environment thought I would do the same and go quiet because I didn’t have the luxury of getting up and leaving. 

Mr T said:

I wonder if it has something to do with being a 'lateling' as we have probably spent the vast majority of our lives trying to mask our true selves and ignoring our needs just to fit in.

Well said, to suddenly ask for the things we need in order to experience life in a more comfortable way is ironically uncomfortable. Personally I don’t bring up my diagnosis much to others because I don’t want to seem like I want special treatment or others to view me differently.

Yep. I think for me it's a definate need to advocate for myself and not just let everything pass. But I am a Christian too, so I think it important not to always think of my own needs and to take into account the needs of others. So it's actually a balancing act - like there's this sweet old man at my parish who always rants on about things I haven't the slightest interest in and it makes me annoyed (they are really negative things which make me feel defensive as if I'm being told off) so when I can't avoid these things, I stay quiet. The other day it came ot my mind that he's an old man and to just let him ramble and so I prayed while he talked and it was much better. Now I often do this, pray for him whilst he's annoying me. Strangely enough, I'm not annoyed anymore. But saying that, when I can, I avoid an interaction. I'm just saying sometimes you can work around it and sometimes not. It's a choice. Right now I'm trying to get a medical appointment and trying to push the right ammount but also bear in mind that they are busy and there's just been a doctor strike so.... trying to practice patience. 

I get it about food as I'm allergic to so much, people get impatient with me and then I feel that I'm not allowed not to like something. Apart from the dificulty in finding a restaurant where I can actually get something I can eat, others make it all so difficult that I routinely say thanks be no thanks to any invitations out to eat. It really bugs me when people don't want to go somewhere that I can't go, even though I'm happy for them to go and leave me out, it soon ends up with me feeling like I'm being deliberately awkward and attention seeking. I think everyone just ends up feeling bad, it's one of the reasons I avoid socialising.

I have the same issue and have found myself apologizing for having a meltdown even though  it is not something we have any control over. I guess we are too polite?

I totally get how you feel. I am very similar to what you describe. I wonder if it has something to do with being a 'lateling' as we have probably spent the vast majority of our lives trying to mask our true selves and ignoring our needs just to fit in.