Published on 12, July, 2020
(Darcie/25/F)
The last two weeks have been manic for me. We have had a friend over for a week then we've been babysitting our granddaughter for 5 days and it's been stressful for me. I've also been working in this time and not had any alone time.
My partner changed the bed and did laundry today while I was at work to help me out and while I appreciate it, I hate the way he does it. I hate the way he makes the bed because it's not how I do it and the way he folds the laundry makes me feel physically uncomfortable to the point I have to refold it all and strip and remake the bed. I love him to bits but now we have a colleague staying with us and I'm just so overwhelmed, I want to cry but I can't let it out. My eye/eyebrow are also twitching uncontrollably and my heart rate won't drop below 90 BPM. I'm stressed, overwhelmed and too hot.
HELP!
"The last two weeks have been manic for me. We have had a friend over for a week then we've been babysitting our granddaughter for 5 days and it's been stressful for me. I've also been working in this time and not had any alone time.
My partner changed the bed and did laundry today while I was at work to help me out and while I appreciate it, I hate the way he does it. I hate the way he makes the bed because it's not how I do it and the way he folds the laundry makes me feel physically uncomfortable to the point I have to refold it all and strip and remake the bed [Link removed by moderator] I love him to bits but now we have a colleague staying with us and I'm just so overwhelmed, I want to cry but I can't let it out. My eye/eyebrow are also twitching uncontrollably and my heart rate won't drop below 90 BPM. I'm stressed, overwhelmed and too hot"
hello
It sounds like you’ve had an incredibly overwhelming couple of weeks, juggling work, family, and hosting all at once. It’s totally understandable that you're feeling stressed and in need of some alone time. The fact that your partner is trying to help, but it’s not in the way you’d like, adds to that frustration—especially when you're already feeling on edge.
It might help to communicate gently with your partner about how you're feeling, not focusing so much on how things are done but more on how overwhelmed you are and what kind of support would be most helpful. It’s okay to let yourself feel what you’re going through, and maybe finding a small moment to decompress could ease some of the stress. Also, if you’re feeling physically overwhelmed, like with the eye twitching and increased heart rate, it might be a sign your body is asking for a break. Even if it’s just a few minutes to breathe and cool down, giving yourself that time is important.
Hang in there—you’re handling a lot, and it’s okay to acknowledge that it’s hard right now.
[Edited by moderator]
How does your partner make the bed that makes you so uncomfortable? I can understand clothes folding, some people just do it all wrong and put creases in places there shouldn't be any, maybe you ask your partner not to fold your stuff? Even worse is when people iron thiings wrong! Like putting creases in your jeans and casual trousers and as for ironing underwear...
Hi!
I have a step-daughter that is 4 years younger than me! My partner is 16 years older than me, lol
I definitely felt all my emotions were building up inside but I managed to talk to my partner and we aren't having anyone over for a couple of months and he's working away every other week so I get plenty of quiet time to myself!
darcie said:Darcie/25/F) The last two weeks have been manic for me. We have had a friend over for a week then we've been babysitting our granddaughter for 5 days and it's been stressful for me. I've also been working in this time and not had any alone time. My partner changed the bed and did laundry today while I was at work to help me out and while I appreciate it, I hate the way he does it. I hate the way he makes the bed because it's not how I do it and the way he folds the laundry makes me feel physically uncomfortable to the point I have to refold it all and strip and remake the bed. I love him to bits but now we have a colleague staying with us and I'm just so overwhelmed, I want to cry but I can't let it out. My eye/eyebrow are also twitching uncontrollably and my heart rate won't drop below 90 BPM. I'm stressed, overwhelmed and too hot. HELP!
Darcie/25/F)
It sounds like you’ve been incredibly overwhelmed lately, balancing hosting, work, and personal stress. It’s okay to feel this way, and finding small moments of self-care can make a big difference. Taking a few minutes each day for deep breathing or a brief escape can help calm your mind and lower your heart rate. It might also be helpful to gently communicate your feelings to your partner, expressing [Link removed by moderator] appreciation while sharing how you’re feeling. Setting boundaries for some alone time and seeking support from friends or family can provide relief and perspective. Remember, prioritizing your well-being is crucial, and it’s okay to ask for help when needed.
Bets regards,jacob345
Edited by moderator
question: it looks like you are saying you are 25/F? but.. you then say you have a grand daughter. Can you clarify?
I have been there and know if I ignore my own needs long enough they burst forth all twisted and aggressive in a torrential meltdown. I also feel really really awful after wards too.
What you describe is an unreasonable amount of domicile invasion that all but the most type A extrovert could handle! So many in one's personal space for so long!
Can you create limits on this sort of thing in the future?
It may be foot-down time.
Claim your space or it will be swallowed by an endless parade of others' exigencies and your own life is subsumed into insignificance!
Read "The Art Of War":
https://ia803407.us.archive.org/35/items/TheArtOfWarBySunTzu/ArtOfWar.pdf
free download from the internet archive.