When and where do you feel you're being 'as you are' ?

Kate Kestrel the countryside is lovely. I like to sit and draw in the countryside sat in the sun. There's something calming about being in the countryside.

For me, it would be my home. It's the one place I can truly be me. Having said that, if I'm visiting someone I feel comfortable with, then I can find it easy to be my authentic autistic self. Admittedly, as it's been just over 5 years since I last visited anyone that I felt truly comfortable with, I question if I would still find it as easy to be myself.

In the countryside, I just love being out in nature and can feel completely myself there. 

Hey Zoey,

I'm not convinced I have a specific location; it is more a state of mind. What I am positive of is that if you have a late diagnosis and spent a great deal of time before that feeling like the odd one, when you are around people who 'get it', it quickly becomes apparent.

Self-validation is far more critical than seeking assurances from others, especially neurotypicals, as it quickly degenerates into an exercise of futility (you cannot explain it sufficiently/they cannot grasp the concept). Is there a particular reason that sharing your diagnosis is relevant? If you haven't needed to confront it before, it may be a specific can of worms you could do without.

Unmasking is quintessentially being yourself. If you can establish the circumstances which promote that feeling, does it matter how you get there? Or if it's a static location. From my experience, it rarely resembles anything I would have considered vital prediagnosis (I got mine when I was 42). 

The best advice I could give anybody late to the party is to take the time you need to learn to be neurodiverse. Tackle the other questions when you are fully adjusted.

Therapy. She's autistic too which helps. 

Im myself at work as I work alone. I don’t feel particularly different but I feel more comfortable. I feel like I will never know my true unmasked self unless I can be me around others and that feels impossible for me right now. I have my first therapy session on Friday so hopefully this is the start of me figuring things out. My goal is to be myself and not care what anyone else thinks about me. 

fingers crossed 

My bedroom. It's literally the only place I can be me. Everywhere else I have to mask especially at school! I try to be myself with my family but it's difficult. I've kept my diagnosis to myself I don't feel comfortable with the idea of everyone else knowing. 

Hello

My diagnosis was largely ignored. My safe place is this community, some shops and library. Also Facebook as I restrict myself. I do voluntary work now.

I feel free and myself when I’m alone. And also here to sone degree - on this site I can share the most “shameful” (weird) pieces of me without being judged or laughed at, what I get instead is some advice (almost always helpful), understanding and other user’s experience reassuring me that I’m not alone. Honestly I used to think that I’m the only weirdo stimming in this world. So it’s empowering. I have never learned to fully mask (I can asses it by the frequency of being told how weird I am and that I need to be fixed) but now when I know better, how my brain works and why I’m different I care much less about what others think or say about me. I let myself unapologetically just be more myself.