Autism and ADHD

The article on Embrace Autism was very helpful. It corroborates what I have observed in myself 

I have only tried versions of methylphenidate though due to supply issues. When I go back in July, they want to try the amphetamine type to see if that is better. 

I’ve been in mirtazapine in the past (long before these diagnoses) for insomnia. I had the least issue with it of all the antidepressants I tried. In general though I am very sensitive to all medication so don’t let my experience out you off trying things that may be helpful to you. 

I also have the issue that I take HRT which interacts with dopamine so the adad medication has variables there to deal with too.  

I’m glad to be helpful

Thank you. GP is looking into medication after I basically pleaded for it.

It is, but here is the catch.

For basic biological reasons you can only do it sparingly, and you have to put back the energy you use, and allow for cellular repair etc. 

So, you MIGHT be able to use stimulants very effectvely to get soemtning done more efficiently and quickly BUT there is a price to be paid afterwards...

The guy who gave me me mne clams that he doesn't have too much trouble with that aspect, but he "runs on them", from what he says, and that according to common sense and what I know about biology is a difficult path, for most people. 

They are illegal because the dangers posed by their use are as pernicious as the obvious benefits of appropropriate use are attractive...

The blanket illegality of some "quite useful when used in the right context" drugs is annoying to many right thinking people, but just letting young Johhny score some speed from the chemist or local drug dealer without prior training and passing an examination that shows the "he knows what he is doing" is a recipe for disaster as well. 

I've spent some years tryng to figure out how to make drugs use (ALL Drugs including tea and booze and para-fecking-liver destroying-cetamol) systemically safer and less confusing for all. 

Essentially , we need to have a test that people have to pass before their recreational use of drugs is classed as legal and semi-respecatble.

I also want this coupled with broadening of real medical knoweldge to include US when we ask for it and not have a heirophant class of magicians AKA consultants keeping it to themsleves in or to preseve the difference.

Finally, I want experimental DIY medicine to be legal. I accidentally ingested a mix of two semi-legal "research chemicals" back in about 2010, which seems to have on a one time dose COMPLETELY obliterated my 50 years of enduring on-off suicidal ideation.

Ethically and legally this is an utter minefield for me.

It was illegal (and somewhat dangerous and stupid) to do what I did, but it got what appears to be the wonderful result of getting that particular dangerous psycholgical monkey off my back, with a single dose!!   

It is perfectly legal for me to recount my story,and even include the details of what I took etc. but it's completely illegal (as well as probably dangerous) for you to try it!

So unless a controlled trial and all that expensive stuff is done, by the establishment, (Where's the money going to come from?) 

The same laws that protect us from hucksters marketting false promise, (that REALLY don't seem to apply to oncolgy) also means that useful stuff also gets "swept under the carpet" a lot more than you'd expect.

A community of nutters doing "experimental medicine" on themselves woudl obviously produce some tragic and maybe comedic results, but I bet we'd also produce some great cures and useful knowledge.  

I for example now know (through the practice of DIY experimental medicine) that whilst canestan and many other expensive compounds that foot fungus is only TREATED by big pharma's prodcuts that are marketted to "treat your feet". And it'll keep coming back and your feet get older and crappier looking, until you go off piste and smear VICK VAPOUR RUB all over them.

THEN you get your feet back after four decades of increasing trouble and ichyness and soreness etc. I haven't even used a half a jar over teh last year.

LOL story of my life. I like the process of making lists. I think it gives me a perceived sense of organisation. Notice I use the word "process". Once made they mostly get lost under piles of things or I don't check them. Or items get transferred endlessly from one list to another.

Sometimes you need to force yourself. Do it, then see how you feel after, if it helped. It's evidential for myself that being outside helps. It might be something else for other people.

So many times I've made lists of things I need to do and it always includes "get out of the house at lunchtime" but I seem unable to actually do it.

No, I was put on mirtazapine before my autism diagnosis as a combined depression and insomnia medication (except it didn't help my sleep and I think I was burned out more than depressed).

You are corroborating what I've read elsewhere though: that autism can become more pronounced on ADHD meds because the ADHD and autism balance each other in some ways.

Thanks for that, thats useful testimony for me.

I dont know your set up, but i find a bit of outdoor pursuits however small can help. I mean, just 5 minutes fresh air or a bit of a walk. I forced myself out before - a change in attention can sometimes help. I think sometimes, it's recognising what's happening and having little tools you know might help. It's different for everyone. 

I think I have found work more difficult since Covid because I almost entirely work at home now. Which means no real social pressure to be seen to do something except when on calls and endless distractions at home, including my favourite: staring into space

Yes and I am now more aware if my head feels like it's full of rusty knives and forks spinning around in a centrifuge, this is NOT normal and it's a warning sign that it's  time to wind things down a bit.

Autisician said:

I end up in or on bed during meetings not listening etc

Oh my goodness, this. I zone out of work calls after about 15-20 minutes and so often end up lying on my bed with my wireless headphones on paying no attention whatsoever. I honestly don’t know how I haven’t got into trouble over it.

I've been told this is part of the  demand avoidance autism profile I have...

I get the same thing, often to the point where I can't think of anything else at all and I feel almost like the thing I'm worried about has happened. I can't work (I end up in or on bed during meetings not listening etc ) , can't sleep, eat, I drop hobbies and end up in a right state.

I'm told this is usually the lead up to burnout, so the thoughts are a symptom that were getting irrational and headed down hill, due to having a flat autistic battery, rather than being a normal part of day to day autism.

When I'm good, as in rested, haven't pushed my autism to far (not doing too many things I find distressing) I don't get these thought traps/rumination. My head is never quiet though, but there is a normal level that definitely gets worse if I've had too much distress.

Like tunnel vision typing a message while the PAN HAS BEEN ON MAXIMUM ON THE HOB FOR 5 MINUTES BOILING AWAY. And i havent noticed a thing. Again!

Edit. I do understand re work. The nature of my job entails working indeoendently "out of hours". I always had the feeling my colleagues, who also find the job challenging, could just "get on with it". What they could seemingly bash out, took me forever. There's a lot of other things at play, like demand etc as well.

It’s only recently that I’ve thought deeply about it myself, mainly because of the impact on my work. Or more specifically the impact on me - I get the work done but at the last minute and with great stress. I procrastinate terribly and my mind flits from one thing to another constantly instead of the thing I need to focus on. But then at the last minute: hyperfocus 

The saddest thing is, personally, I didn't know until REALLY RECENTLY how much of a problem this causes me and always has done. Its a normal psrt of my life and i dont know any differently. And every time I read about adhd, nowhere did it mention internal manifestations. Like my initial research into autism it was mostly about the external. Many times in CBT I said "I can't stop thinking about something but it isnt worrying me". Referencing another thread on sleep, and lack of it, this unquietend mind was often the culprit.

It sounds like such a simple thing, doesn’t it! 

But it would be like winning the lottery

Amerantin said:

”Until that day, they did not know what it felt like to “have a quiet mind” or to “want to do something and just be able to decide to do it”.”

ooooooohhhhhh.........HOW NICE would THAT BE !!!!

Hmm, thanks for this. It’s a bit of a depressing read although it does bear out what I’ve heard elsewhere e.g. that ADHD meds may heighten autistic “symptoms”.

However even if stimulants don’t work out I have seen some articles and videos about non-stimulant ADHD meds that may be worth trying (e.g. strattera).

I really envy those people who it does work for. This from your article really stands out:

”Until that day, they did not know what it felt like to “have a quiet mind” or to “want to do something and just be able to decide to do it”.”