Published on 12, July, 2020
I know I can't control absolutely everything that happens in my life but I'd like to be able to control the things I can. Unfortunately, I can't.
I've always been a people pleaser, which doesn't help. I find myself more prone to wanting to lash out because of it, I've been in the same position for so long and my inability to assert myself or stand my ground doesn't help.
I would sooner let someone mistreat me than confront them because it's safer to just let them. I know I'll come away from it feeling more angry and resentful but I don't feel safe enough in the moment,
I'm intrigued as to what has helped people (if there is anything that has). Maybe there's something I've not dug deep into enough.
I heard somewhere that if you find yourself agreeing to stuff that you dont actually want to, you could try this. If they ask "can you do this?" then instead of being in the spot of that moment and saying yes, you could let them know that sometimes you agree to things that you didnt want to and that you need more time to think about it. Then you could like text them later or something when you have fully thought through what you want. Ig the only way it wouldnt work is if its a thing they need an awnser to right that moment.
I am bad with people pleaseing but ive been trying to be better about not agreeing to everything
That's my problem, I'm terrible at coming up with something to say in the moment.
There is the occasional point where I'm able to stand my ground but I am more likely to just cave in if it means the person isn't upset with me.
Sometimes if it involves my parents I can send my dad a text later if there's something I've not been happy with but it doesn't feel right.