Autism Diagnosis - The days & weeks after being diagnosed

Exactly - we'll never know - but we have survived - and hopefully now - after being diagnosed - we can prosper.  Or at least understand ourselves better - and allow others to do the same. 

Your last point about wondering what your life might have been like really resonates with me.

My first reaction when i discovered I was autistic was to have a period of grief. Real grief for my younger self.

How much better might high school have been. University might have been a fabulous experience instead of a nightmare. I might even have friends and a wife!

But I can’t turn the clock back.

I was diagnosed a few months ago after it being picked up during an ADHD assessment in March.  I had suspected that I was autistic on and off for over 10 years. I'm 47 - and when I was diagnosed I took a deep dive into the symptoms and issues of autism in adults and children - and when I then looked back over my life it was like I was seeing myself for the first time. I realised that all of the problems I've had during my life (which have been many) were due to me being autistic - not being mad - bipolar - or schizophrenic - which are just some of the labels that drs have tried to stick on me over the years. 

I've struggled with alcohol and drugs - which I'd used primarily in social situations - but having the diagnosis has empowered me. Now I don't allow myself to be in situations that make me feel anxious or upset. I feel.like I am allowed to be in control. I do appreciate that I am at the beginning of this journey and I may feel differently in a few months - but at the moment I feel positive. 

I haven't yet been able to access any support - but I hope to soon. I do need help. I am on my own and my housing situation is tenuous - but despite this I feel ok at the minute. 

I have been self employed for the last 12 years which has been the only way I have been able to make employment work for me. It gives me flexibility - so if I'm feeling burnt out or depressed or anxious - I can have time off without being sacked. I'd never been able to hold down a job for long before becoming self employed because I would suffer from what I now know is burn out.

I subcontract my services to different companies - I haven't told anyone at any of these places about my diagnosis - I have only told a handful of people that I am close to. 

I feel quite scared about telling people that I don't know well and some that I do - In general I don't like giving people information about myself because I feel it could be used against me - so I have always preferred to literally keep myself to myself - but I would like to be able to discuss my diagnosis more freely - I hope this is something I can work on in any counselling I can access. 

The one thing that I have struggled with a bit is wondering how my life may have turned out differently if I had been diagnosed as a child (with autism and ADHD) - I wonder if I'd had the support then maybe I'd have done better academically - maybe I'd have become a Dr or a scientist? But then conversely - I wonder - if I was diagnosed as a child would I have done a lot of the things I've done? If I was diagnosed as a child life may have been easier in many ways - I would've been more protected - but I also may have been told that I couldn't or shouldn't do certain things? I guess that's why we are told to try and concentrate on the present.

Ditto to lots of this and to Amerantin.  I was diagnosed at the start of January.  I was also offered 6 sessions which were OK, but I did have to chase them up to get on them.  A lot of what was covered I had already read up on.  I've also done some other discussion groups I found on twitter.

I decided to be open, have blogged and spoken about how things are for me at work.  I am lucky in having a supportive team and we are currently trying to put reasonable adjustments in place, although this went a bit pear shaped with a recent office move. 

One of the issues I have is that I don't know what I want or need and can't properly articulate some of the stressors I have.  Everyone says I do a good job although they do know I can get frustrated/stressed more than your average Joe.  So it's great that I'm being offered help and I'm trying to overcome the pride issue of not asking for help but at the same time I'm finding some of the suggestions of different bits of software, techniques and where I should be sat a little bit overwhelming.  I also need a better strategy for what to do on days when I'm in the office and feel like my head might explode, at the minute I just try and keep a lid on it til I get home.

Hi GPK26

I too am 52 and was diagnosed a few months ago. Still on the journey but I do have one bit of experience to share.

I told a handful of people about my diagnosis at work - my manager and three people I’m friendly with and have known for a very long time. My manager has been good about it but the three others have distanced themselves from me and I can only assume they see me differently now or are uncomfortable in some way. It’s been very disappointing indeed.