Published on 12, July, 2020
Given experience often helps, and there are often newly diagnosed members joining the forum, I thought if we shared the things that help us most in bullet points it would be an easy read reference for everyone?
For me, has been:
- Meeting only small groups if I plan to meet people
- Meditation & Breath work (helped anxiety & digestion)
- Symprove Probiotics (helped anxiety & digestion)
- Walking in nature (elevates mood)
- Watching childhood movies (calming)
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Skip this next bit tbh I just felt compelled to write explainations for some of them.
* I'm of the opinion everyone should be off social media anyway, since the advent of sites like MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Parler, Whisper, and TikTok the human psyche has been horribly damaged. The Ad for them should read "Want to invite a slury of cults into your house in the next 5 mins? Then YOU should join Social Media!" XD
** If I'm going to meet new people I weigh up the pros and cons of just being open about being autistic from the start. But I never mention it in forms unless I really have to, I like to have control over who does and doesn't know so a document just existing to get read by anyone willy nilly is not something I want out there. AFAIC it's my diagnosis my business, nobody else's. If I don't want to mask or the mask slips and they think I'm a bit odd so be it, I'll deal with that when I'm good and ready. But Almost everyone outside of a professional work related setting just gets hit with it right off the bat like "Hi I'm Sam, if I do or say anything that seems like it could be a bit autistic that's because I am."
*** Because I don't have to look them in the eyes on the phone or worry about what I look like, I find it helpful to have a polite chat even if it's just a short "Hi _name_, I'm just calling to confirm our meeting is in _location_, and at _time_ is that correct? Yes okay then, that's great, thank you, see you then." and after that goes well they are 1, not a total stranger anymore, and 2, because their tone will be pleasant I can chase away thoughts that they must instantly hate me for no apparent reason when we actually meet face to face, which makes teh actual meeting more relaxed.If there is more than one person in the actual meeting I will just focus on the person I already spoke to on the phone, and give a courtesy glance at teh other person only when they speak specifically.
The advice about staying off all social media is a good one, especially post-Covid - my younger cousin and her husband , (although non-autistic) are traditional Irish Catholic patriots and have a young family and are determined to raise them in the traditional way, as our grandparents would have done in my home County in Rural Ireland - the eldest of 3 is 10 now and my cousin ditched all of her tech devices and quit her job after her first child was born to become a full time mother despite the financial pressures involved - there is no TV, Internet/broadband, radio, newspapers nor mobile phones at all allowed in the family home, the family, being devout traditional Catholics, pray the Rosary in Latin together as a family daily and attend Traditional Latin Mass as a family every Sunday - the children are all homeschooled, learn all about Irish history and go on pilgrimages to Knock Shrine, Croagh Patrick, Lough Derg and go to the Gaeltacht every summer, so are all fluent Irish Gaelic speakers and are a credit to her, very well behaved, will not be going to university and will enter a trade when they are old enough - they will only be deemed to become adults when they reach the age of 21 and (not) 16 or 18 and they also have daily chores that they must complete before 6pm, as my cousin and her husband want to instill discipline and traditional moral and social values, about which they are totally uncompromising yet correct
It's not a religious or a traditionalist thing for me though. It's purely a mental health thing, and technically these old style forums are a form of social media too it's just the modern platforms are designed to be addictive and influence people and manufacture outrage where none need exist. I'll probably let my son on the internet free-range at 16-18 as that's the age I did and it did me no harm, I already knew who I was by that age and the unqualified opinion of haters online couldn't dent it by that age. I do think modern parents make a mistake letting kids online at 10-13 though, that's when they are most susceptable to bigotry, body image nonsense, predators, and extremist rubbish.
Oakling said: Alone time. This is a chance for me to stim, explore hobbies and explore my special interests. This time is important and purely for me.
i dont get enough of that
The Empire says so.
I Sperg said:When their governments then decided to smash up their previous societal model based on productivity and invention and the nuclear family unit, with one based on abitrary and ever changing rules where the only constant is the never ending attack on all that was considered good & wholesome before. We have had thousands of years of human history now, and there have been many prophets, gurus and seers along the way who have taken a really, really good stab at whomping up a framework for how humans should live, and the routes to self destructions and mayhem are clearly signposted now, yet thus of us who sin, (or violate those common sense precepts in some way, if you prefer) still loudly insist on or right to do it openly, and ignore the rights of others to not be exposed to our weakness. We now take PRIDE in our violations of commonsense, time held traditions and morality.
When their governments then decided to smash up their previous societal model based on productivity and invention and the nuclear family unit, with one based on abitrary and ever changing rules where the only constant is the never ending attack on all that was considered good & wholesome before.
We have had thousands of years of human history now, and there have been many prophets, gurus and seers along the way who have taken a really, really good stab at whomping up a framework for how humans should live, and the routes to self destructions and mayhem are clearly signposted now, yet thus of us who sin, (or violate those common sense precepts in some way, if you prefer) still loudly insist on or right to do it openly, and ignore the rights of others to not be exposed to our weakness.
We now take PRIDE in our violations of commonsense, time held traditions and morality.
I Sperg said:Should kindergarten kids be shown how to twerk, weild a firearm or pack a bong? Really?
This is a really hyperbolic and unhelpful response, you really didn't need to say all that just to say you hate mainstream societal progress.
I'd ask Who this "their governments" are and for an actualy working example of how they "smash up their previous societal model" but this is really off topic to the discussion about what helps people individually as autists. Making the jump from a respectful aknowledgement of religious difference affecting our personal upbringing between me and IrishInManchester to inserting a political slant is just going to derail this thread and feels like it's done in bad faith.
You're welcome to DM me (my DMs are open) what you really think but out of respect for JT I'm not going to discuss this with you further on this thread.