Published on 12, July, 2020
Thanks to Number in another thread (root beer) I've been thinking of the many things I've just 'not got' and done wrong.
Usually the clue that I'm not 'getting it' is the look of wonder on the faces of other people.
I'm suspecting now this may be autism related.
There are countless examples during my life but here a few.
McDonalds: I don't really understand McDonalds and I don't spend time in them without another person.
My mum used to like them so I'd take her there for lunch sometimes.
One of the 1st times she asked me to collect a menu for her and some cutlery.
I couldn't understand why these weren't on the table.
So, I went to the counter and asked for these things.
After this initial trauma, I then had the trauma of trying to understand what you are supposed to eat off of and with.
Doh.
McDonalds is a particular thing with me I think.
I was with my autistic friend on our way back from visiting his mother and we went to a McD.
He asked me to get him a 'root beer'.
So, I asked for such at the counter only to be asked what that is.
I said 'I don't know' so no root beer was presented to my friend.
Another prime example is going to a spa and swimming baths in a hotel.
I'm not a swimmer or a spa goer.
So, the 1st thing I did was put my make-up on before going there.
Then, I couldn't understand how the lockers worked and had to get assistance.
Then, I eventually found the toilets but couldn't find my way back to the swimming pool so I walked through reception soaking wet in my swimming costume.
I was also in a church once when a service began and loads of people sat around me.
I had gone in there because I was in a strange city and cold and was using the church as a refuge.
I thought I could just sit there whilst the service took place.
I hadn't anticipated communion and although I'm not a Catholic or a church goer, and although I didn't understand what I was doing, I felt obliged to follow everyone up and take communion.
There are so many examples I won't continue.
Is it just me or are there other people here who just don't 'get it?'.
That sounds more like it. I finally had some homemade leaf mould for my garden this year. It was wonderful.
Leaf blowers are like "The solution to pollution is dilution" approach to gardening...
The one I borrowed last week however has a switch that sucks the leafs into a bag. Much more satisfying.
Leaf blowers. I don't understand leaf blowers. I've seen one being used twice these past few weeks on grass clippings. I don't understand why you'd blow something from one place to another. Just use a rake in the first place or leave said items in situ.
100% relate to this! My sister was crying the other day and I literally froze and stared, had no idea what to say/if I should say something. Didn't know what to do. I felt bad after for not being able to comfort her and support her during such an emotional time but I don't know what I could have/should have done. One of lives mysteries I'm still trying to work out.
I went on a date once with a chap.
When we came back to his car from the cinema it had been broken into and his tapes stolen (tapes - that dates it).
He went really ballistic and I started giggling.
I think it was partly nerves.
I did feel sympathy for him but his reaction seemed a bit much.
As a general point, I am similar to you in this.
I don't get how to react when someone is upset/crying about something that I wouldn't be upset about. I'll probably laugh to release the tension, or freeze and go silent because I can't say the right thing or do the right body language.
We certainly don't. Our formative years are incredibly influential on us and the paths our lives will take. Which is why bringing back an improved version of SureStart will be so important. But i digress.
"You have to watch the quiet ones haha" why? I personally think you need to an eye on the louder ones who seem to enjoy stirring up trouble.
Women's magazines and the need women have to comment on other womens' weight.
I've found, especially when younger, people are always quick to comment on how quiet someone is, like it's a bad thing. It isn't said explicitly but in the tone of voice or context. There don't seem to be the same kind of comments directed at loud or obnoxious individuals.
I don't get why some people need to make things unpleasant for others. I'm quiet, awkward, and I suppose come across as a little odd at work. Yet instead of just leaving me be, others feel the need to make it known that I'm not welcome or liked.
I'm finally catching up with this thread quick before I head back out and I have to say I'd much rather have had someone like Eureka O'Hara read me a book as a kid than say... Mr Blobby.Oh apparently I'm not the only one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97fw8xjB5u4
We never really leave the past behind do we x
In the 1990's i could not admit what i was even to myself. I was a troubled teenager at the time. I am still greatly repressed by my upbringing.
I'm pleased to hear that.
When I was a teenager in the 70s discussing your sexuality (if you weren't straight!) was a difficult thing to do and you had to choose who you revealed yourself to with great care, because of huge prejudice.
Families fell apart because of it.
At least nowadays there is more openness and in some sectors of society, more acceptance of difference than when we were growing up.
There's a lot of acceptance these days, it's good, encourages people to be themselves and be happy.
Even the staff on my ward accept my autism and the fact I'm Bi. No judgement. It's nice.
Neither was I, but my ears still seem to have fairly decent sensitivity now I am older, and if I'd not worn earplugs most of the time on the range and when at gigs, or operating certain machines, and most importantly not driving with the window open (that ruins your right ear over time) the evidence suggests I'd be a lot deafer now.
When I was young I used to use short plugs and fit 'em deep so it wasn't obvious at gigs...
The most hazardous gigs (for your ears) are little ones where the amps are run into distortion, the bigger ones have more power so they can get up to the legal limit without clipping, and there are regulations in place to limit the overall sound pressure levels.
Keeping up when you get older is hard enough, you may as well give yourself a chance to be able to still at least hear what is going on...
Not sure why I'm concerned about your hearing, when I think about it, but I like to be helpful when I can. (and if my dad hadn't told me about driving with the window down, I'd have ruined the hearing on my right side too, like he did).
Was never an earplug guy.
Take earplugs. Although it's better now, they still sometimes use ear damaging levels of sound.
Autism does seem to be affected by the amount of sound one is processing too.
Going to "Gigs" isn't really so much about the listening...
When i was younger i would attend gigs and then drink heavily to deal with Social Anxiety. I'm not sure how i'd cope sober but i intend to try and attend one again one day.