Baby

I took advice you gave to me and told him that I'm a person and if I say no then I don't want it to happen. He called me a retarded freak and said were threw. So I'm very upset at the moment I wasn't expecting him to say and do that. He literally walked out this morning and he's blocked my number and me on Facebook. I've been crying all day so much I don't like being called mean things. I don't want to be lonely but now I'm alone. Maybe I'll find another man next year if I get better. For now I focus on my health.

I have spoken to my nurses team and they say they can help me talk to family about my health so I think one may come to house tomorrow to talk to everyone. I'm a bit worried about that too be honest. I don't know how everyone's going to react. I don't like it.

Also there's talk about them giving me chemotherapy but I read online that it can make you very sick so I'm not sure if I good idea or not. 

I have been very ill again today though so may be it would be a good idea. I don't know what to do about it.

Wow! I am SO incredibly impressed. And feel with you. It seems 2 days ago you posted and here you are standing up for yourself, which is Self-Care 101. But I do know what it feels like to be met with that same response, it's incredibly painful, but please trust me that: Once you cry through it, and some time passes and you can take uninterrupted quality time to think and allow yourself 'be', and you, in turn, delete him from your future, most likely you will feel absolutely no regrets, but a massive sense of relief.

I was in your situation and I did end up pregnant. But without support, I was depressed, overworked, abused, alone. I already had one son and the man I was with was manipulative, cruel, eventually kidnapping my son and left me in severe debt & in the US that meant homeless. I terminated that second pregnancy and I don't regret it. I do have an adult child now (who I wouldn't change for anything) but nothing has been easy. I left his father shortly after that termination and my whole life incrementally got better one step at a time. In fact, today, 20 years later, I am in a way I could've never dreamed! And I'm not middle class, but I am content. I simply had no idea what I was capable of learning, what I was capable of becoming. And all I needed to do was hunt down everything required for self-care including my physiological, psychological, emotional and spiritual health. That started with drawing lines or boundaries and learning to protect my self, my heart, my potential, my core being. 

"Everyone is worthwhile including me". Take ALL the time you need to heal. Sometimes we find ourselves going through motions of life, being motivated by what seems innate or 'natural'. But that wild, natural animalistic nature, when reasoned with, can become disciplined, focused, intentional and inspiring: it takes work and tears. I had to cry so many wrong perspectives out of my thinking. I mean buckets. 

I sincerely hope you can find friendships - a few key good ones who care about helping, healing and invest time in them. We only need a couple really close friends. The opposite of To Dominate is To Connect. Investing in individuals who are giving rather than those who just want to take is no small matter. Learning to walk away from forceful, controlling and domineering humans was difficult at first. These people are not interested in who we are, just using us. Once I learned I could chose who I wanted to be friends with or who I allowed my self to be close to, it was life changing. x

Wow! I am SO incredibly impressed. And feel with you. It seems 2 days ago you posted and here you are standing up for yourself, which is Self-Care 101. But I do know what it feels like to be met with that same response, it's incredibly painful, but please trust me that: Once you cry through it, and some time passes and you can take uninterrupted quality time to think and allow yourself 'be', and you, in turn, delete him from your future, most likely you will feel absolutely no regrets, but a massive sense of relief.

I was in your situation and I did end up pregnant. But without support, I was depressed, overworked, abused, alone. I already had one son and the man I was with was manipulative, cruel, eventually kidnapping my son and left me in severe debt & in the US that meant homeless. I terminated that second pregnancy and I don't regret it. I do have an adult child now (who I wouldn't change for anything) but nothing has been easy. I left his father shortly after that termination and my whole life incrementally got better one step at a time. In fact, today, 20 years later, I am in a way I could've never dreamed! And I'm not middle class, but I am content. I simply had no idea what I was capable of learning, what I was capable of becoming. And all I needed to do was hunt down everything required for self-care including my physiological, psychological, emotional and spiritual health. That started with drawing lines or boundaries and learning to protect my self, my heart, my potential, my core being. 

"Everyone is worthwhile including me". Take ALL the time you need to heal. Sometimes we find ourselves going through motions of life, being motivated by what seems innate or 'natural'. But that wild, natural animalistic nature, when reasoned with, can become disciplined, focused, intentional and inspiring: it takes work and tears. I had to cry so many wrong perspectives out of my thinking. I mean buckets. 

I sincerely hope you can find friendships - a few key good ones who care about helping, healing and invest time in them. We only need a couple really close friends. The opposite of To Dominate is To Connect. Investing in individuals who are giving rather than those who just want to take is no small matter. Learning to walk away from forceful, controlling and domineering humans was difficult at first. These people are not interested in who we are, just using us. Once I learned I could chose who I wanted to be friends with or who I allowed my self to be close to, it was life changing. x

Once I learned I could chose who I wanted to be friends with or who I allowed my self to be close to, it was life changing. x

Me too! I never realised til recently that I didn't have to just be friends with the people who gravitated to me. I could actually choose who to connect with and who to distance myself from.